[ That's the thing. He's relived it in memories, nightmares, dreams. This is different. This was real, present. Not worse, exactly, but perhaps it feels so because he never learned how to...what to do.
He didn't think he'd ever had to.
It takes effort not to shrug off Jaskier's words, his gentle touch. Instinctively, he wants to reject the comfort Jaskier is offering. He's...fuck. The irony is, surviving was so much simpler. He knows it like the back of his hand, ingrained in him since he was five summers old. But this. Being home, around the people who worry about him. Who care, who want to know if he's doing better, healing, if he needs anything—
It's easier to lick his wounds alone, and yet. He can't bring himself to push Jaskier away. Or to crawl off alone. Not anymore. ]
I made my peace once. [ His voice is quiet. He did. He can do it again, if he has to. But he understands what Jaskier is saying. Thinks he does, at least, and so he adds: ] You rented a room in Nocwich?
[ He isn't changing the topic. It's his way of asking if Jaskier will stay. Here, with him. Tonight. ]
no subject
He didn't think he'd ever had to.
It takes effort not to shrug off Jaskier's words, his gentle touch. Instinctively, he wants to reject the comfort Jaskier is offering. He's...fuck. The irony is, surviving was so much simpler. He knows it like the back of his hand, ingrained in him since he was five summers old. But this. Being home, around the people who worry about him. Who care, who want to know if he's doing better, healing, if he needs anything—
It's easier to lick his wounds alone, and yet. He can't bring himself to push Jaskier away. Or to crawl off alone. Not anymore. ]
I made my peace once. [ His voice is quiet. He did. He can do it again, if he has to. But he understands what Jaskier is saying. Thinks he does, at least, and so he adds: ] You rented a room in Nocwich?
[ He isn't changing the topic. It's his way of asking if Jaskier will stay. Here, with him. Tonight. ]