Well I'm not nobody to you. Istredd replies and there is absolutely smugness in his tone there. And that's good enough for me. All he really wanted was to be important to someone. It seemed like such an easy thing to want. He had other lovers and they wanted the same thing from him, but he could never do it, and here he has been, following Lucifer around with lovestruck eyes.
Istredd feels less afraid now that he has said the words and not taken them back. It's comfortable. It feels good and right. He did the brave thing and spoke from the heart. Whatever happens from here, he can be glad. Except it seems like his confession is going to lead somewhere good, and being rewarded for doing the scary thing is new. Fantastic, too.
"Because hope is rare." He knows it was a rhetorical question, Lucifer echoing the same thing back to him, but the answer is true for both of them. They are not people who usually hope for better things for themselves. Being hopeful could lead to misery and loss. This beautiful connection between them always was a risk. So is putting a name to it.
The smile that blossoms from that confirmation is brilliant in a way never seen before because it lacks any reserve. He smiles like an idiot at him, ear to ear, and he's happy. Light and bubbly joy flows between them and he's thrilled and excited and still a little scared. Istredd closes the space and simply presses their foreheads together, a hand gentle on his arm, and that's all it takes for him to soak it in.
"This is all I need," he tells him softly. He means the clarity of Lucifer's feelings. A concrete agreement from him. These simple physical gestures are giving him the intimacy he craves. "I love you, Lucifer." The confession before was more or less forced out and now it is distinct. Direct. Fearless. He's saying it because he feels it and Lucifer deserves to hear it.
"And I don't need you to say it, and I don't need to have sex with you, I'm happy with this. You know that I'm telling the truth." Istredd's entirely truthful through their bond, there is no mistaking it. He is happy. He is content. Anything else is just frosting on the perfect cake. Istredd's hand moves up to behind Lucifer's neck, cradling him.
no subject
Istredd feels less afraid now that he has said the words and not taken them back. It's comfortable. It feels good and right. He did the brave thing and spoke from the heart. Whatever happens from here, he can be glad. Except it seems like his confession is going to lead somewhere good, and being rewarded for doing the scary thing is new. Fantastic, too.
"Because hope is rare." He knows it was a rhetorical question, Lucifer echoing the same thing back to him, but the answer is true for both of them. They are not people who usually hope for better things for themselves. Being hopeful could lead to misery and loss. This beautiful connection between them always was a risk. So is putting a name to it.
The smile that blossoms from that confirmation is brilliant in a way never seen before because it lacks any reserve. He smiles like an idiot at him, ear to ear, and he's happy. Light and bubbly joy flows between them and he's thrilled and excited and still a little scared. Istredd closes the space and simply presses their foreheads together, a hand gentle on his arm, and that's all it takes for him to soak it in.
"This is all I need," he tells him softly. He means the clarity of Lucifer's feelings. A concrete agreement from him. These simple physical gestures are giving him the intimacy he craves. "I love you, Lucifer." The confession before was more or less forced out and now it is distinct. Direct. Fearless. He's saying it because he feels it and Lucifer deserves to hear it.
"And I don't need you to say it, and I don't need to have sex with you, I'm happy with this. You know that I'm telling the truth." Istredd's entirely truthful through their bond, there is no mistaking it. He is happy. He is content. Anything else is just frosting on the perfect cake. Istredd's hand moves up to behind Lucifer's neck, cradling him.
You're mine. He says it with such satisfaction.