Lucifer probably keeps ending up in this position because he keeps acting almost human around humans.
Kahlil should know better, but when this is over he'll still blame the drink.
Keeping him in place should've been a mistake. With anyone else, maybe not, but he's well aware how strong Lucifer is at this point, how little he can do to escape without damaging them both very seriously. It's not that he needs blood to use his abilities, it's that his powers are inherently dangerous. The Gray Space is hostile to even those who know how to navigate it. Mistakes are too easy to make, and using his power in a panic will always end badly. Dayyid taught him that.
Dayyid also used to lock him in warded rooms with no light that he could not escape from. Even when he was young, he preferred the beatings.
So, he listens, because at first he doesn't really have a choice. Not without doing something incredibly dangerous and stupid, in front of a lot of dangerous people. He's not so intoxicated that he doesn't realize that. At this point, he's practically sober from the adrenaline.
He doesn't know much about Lucifer's story. Satan doesn't mean much to him. His religion doesn't have stories where god created his own enemy. All that is part of god is divine. Even the destroyer isn't evil. He just is.
Kahlil has no family left. He has no church, though the world is better for it. He has no home. He didn't have his memories for two years, and in that time his mind has fabricated a history that makes no sense. He had Alidas, and as soon as Kahlil became comfortable with that new life, it was pulled out from under him like a rug. Alidas gave him freedom, and he didn't have any idea what to do with it. He has Jack now, and for a while that was good, but now Jack has Sabine again and he's waiting for the rug to be pulled again.
Kahlil has: a name he's chosen for himself, and a mission he's chosen to believe.
That should be enough. That was enough for a decade. Why isn't it enough now?
He doesn't know whether to be more embarrassed for himself right now, or Lucifer. Probably himself. He doesn't know how Lucifer was abandoned in his past. He would ask the devil himself, but it's not really the time or place right now.
The roadside kitten analogy is - for whatever reason, what finally breaks the spell. That Lucifer says they have this in common. He doesn't immediately know what to do with that. He wants to laugh, but unlike Lucifer he's able to stop himself from doing that.
Instead, he chooses to do something that he hopes has Dayyid's soulless bones rolling in their unmarked grave.
"Thank you," he slowly says, finally meeting Lucifer's gaze after that long, stunned pause. Then -
"This is for trying to murder me." He telegraphs his movements very carefully, placing both hands on either side of Lucifer's head. They're of the same height, so when he tips the divine being's head down it doesn't take much to lean over and place a platonic kiss on his forehead. A peck. He pulls away with a hard, but not uncaring smile.
He hopes you feel the same way as he does whenever you touch the food on his plate.
Unless Lucifer plans to rip his face off his skull right then and there, he's going to make a hasty exit - on foot, to actually get some water and calm down, feeling for the second time in a month that he just cheated death.
cw mention of past child abuse
Kahlil should know better, but when this is over he'll still blame the drink.
Keeping him in place should've been a mistake. With anyone else, maybe not, but he's well aware how strong Lucifer is at this point, how little he can do to escape without damaging them both very seriously. It's not that he needs blood to use his abilities, it's that his powers are inherently dangerous. The Gray Space is hostile to even those who know how to navigate it. Mistakes are too easy to make, and using his power in a panic will always end badly. Dayyid taught him that.
Dayyid also used to lock him in warded rooms with no light that he could not escape from. Even when he was young, he preferred the beatings.
So, he listens, because at first he doesn't really have a choice. Not without doing something incredibly dangerous and stupid, in front of a lot of dangerous people. He's not so intoxicated that he doesn't realize that. At this point, he's practically sober from the adrenaline.
He doesn't know much about Lucifer's story. Satan doesn't mean much to him. His religion doesn't have stories where god created his own enemy. All that is part of god is divine. Even the destroyer isn't evil. He just is.
Kahlil has no family left. He has no church, though the world is better for it. He has no home. He didn't have his memories for two years, and in that time his mind has fabricated a history that makes no sense. He had Alidas, and as soon as Kahlil became comfortable with that new life, it was pulled out from under him like a rug. Alidas gave him freedom, and he didn't have any idea what to do with it. He has Jack now, and for a while that was good, but now Jack has Sabine again and he's waiting for the rug to be pulled again.
Kahlil has: a name he's chosen for himself, and a mission he's chosen to believe.
That should be enough. That was enough for a decade. Why isn't it enough now?
He doesn't know whether to be more embarrassed for himself right now, or Lucifer. Probably himself. He doesn't know how Lucifer was abandoned in his past. He would ask the devil himself, but it's not really the time or place right now.
The roadside kitten analogy is - for whatever reason, what finally breaks the spell. That Lucifer says they have this in common. He doesn't immediately know what to do with that. He wants to laugh, but unlike Lucifer he's able to stop himself from doing that.
Instead, he chooses to do something that he hopes has Dayyid's soulless bones rolling in their unmarked grave.
"Thank you," he slowly says, finally meeting Lucifer's gaze after that long, stunned pause. Then -
"This is for trying to murder me." He telegraphs his movements very carefully, placing both hands on either side of Lucifer's head. They're of the same height, so when he tips the divine being's head down it doesn't take much to lean over and place a platonic kiss on his forehead. A peck. He pulls away with a hard, but not uncaring smile.
He hopes you feel the same way as he does whenever you touch the food on his plate.
Unless Lucifer plans to rip his face off his skull right then and there, he's going to make a hasty exit - on foot, to actually get some water and calm down, feeling for the second time in a month that he just cheated death.