Estinien glances up to catch Amos's expression as he starts talking about his own friend, finding the feeling of it very relatable. In some ways, he feels like an imposter for garnering that sort of reaction. After all, he's mostly just talking as his own friends do... trying to capture some of that energy for himself, through admiration and mimicry.
Even as Amos seems to close himself off after a few seconds, Estinien understands. He feels the same way, really. Though he's gotten better at it, too much softness can be difficult. It's only due to fortunate circumstances and the guidance of others that he's really learned to do it at all. He understands the meaning behind his own words and he means them when he says them, but he knows full well that without an example to follow, he'd be lost.
He doesn't know how to do these things instinctually, like some people do, and it feels wrong to give that impression.
"I, too, have been following the example of others in that regard," he says, shrugging a shoulder and offering his own ephemeral smile. "Without them... I'm not certain I ever would have learned to believe in better things. For the longest time... I could scarcely imagine having any part in it."
But he does now, as uncertainly and as imperfectly as befits his lack of experience. That Amos seems to find any comfort in it feels satisfying, somehow.
"But, aye. Solvunn reminds me of a place close to my heart... and I can only hope that impression is justified."
He has his worries and his doubts, but so far Solvunn has done nothing to earn them. They are not so freely giving that it feels suspicious, but not unfair in their demands. His biggest worry is that he won't be able to do what he needs to if he lets himself get too comfortable.
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Even as Amos seems to close himself off after a few seconds, Estinien understands. He feels the same way, really. Though he's gotten better at it, too much softness can be difficult. It's only due to fortunate circumstances and the guidance of others that he's really learned to do it at all. He understands the meaning behind his own words and he means them when he says them, but he knows full well that without an example to follow, he'd be lost.
He doesn't know how to do these things instinctually, like some people do, and it feels wrong to give that impression.
"I, too, have been following the example of others in that regard," he says, shrugging a shoulder and offering his own ephemeral smile. "Without them... I'm not certain I ever would have learned to believe in better things. For the longest time... I could scarcely imagine having any part in it."
But he does now, as uncertainly and as imperfectly as befits his lack of experience. That Amos seems to find any comfort in it feels satisfying, somehow.
"But, aye. Solvunn reminds me of a place close to my heart... and I can only hope that impression is justified."
He has his worries and his doubts, but so far Solvunn has done nothing to earn them. They are not so freely giving that it feels suspicious, but not unfair in their demands. His biggest worry is that he won't be able to do what he needs to if he lets himself get too comfortable.