[ Amos offers him a shrug before taking another sip of his drink. ]
Maybe they just don't think about people that aren't their own.
[ Which, okay — now he's talking about himself without explicitly talking about himself. It should worry him, at least a little, that Nero has inadvertently started describing Amos to a tee, but it... doesn't. Not really. He knows what he is. And only wanting to look after your own people, saying fuck the rest of the world — that's exactly how Amos has gone through life. That's his best case scenario. No matter how good the company he surrounds himself with, no matter how much he tries to attach himself to righteous people, their motives will never sink in for him. Their philosophies will never be his own.
At the same time, the idea that you can't be good if all you do is look after your own people is. Well. Amos knew he was never going to be good, anyway, so. ]
Others don't have to be worthless to be irrelevant. You just... don't think about them. That's all. And maybe that means Solvunn isn't good. But as long as they're looking after their own, I figure they're alright. It's good enough.
[ This is all going a lot easier for him now that the conversation has shifted closer towards what Amos actually knows. There are contradictions there, sure; he's a contradictory person. Someone who does not care, cannot care, but feels the need to make the effort regardless. It's futile. He'll never be good enough. Still, he has to try.
For at least as long as he can remember to. Place like this, stranger in a strange world, that might end sooner rather than later.
Nero's also easier to talk to when he's more subdued. Or at least closer to Amos' speed. ]
Yup. There are ways you can live a good life without being a good person. [ Not too long ago he'd had to explain that to someone else, though she was a friend. And receptive, at that. Someone else who needed to know that. ] You do the right thing, help others not die? Even if it's just because someone else asked. Or because you think it's funny. Still did a good thing. That's the only part that really counts.
[ He genuinely believes that, too. Not a whole lot of room for arguing there. Someone makes that the founding principle of their life, it's pretty difficult to break it. ]
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Maybe they just don't think about people that aren't their own.
[ Which, okay — now he's talking about himself without explicitly talking about himself. It should worry him, at least a little, that Nero has inadvertently started describing Amos to a tee, but it... doesn't. Not really. He knows what he is. And only wanting to look after your own people, saying fuck the rest of the world — that's exactly how Amos has gone through life. That's his best case scenario. No matter how good the company he surrounds himself with, no matter how much he tries to attach himself to righteous people, their motives will never sink in for him. Their philosophies will never be his own.
At the same time, the idea that you can't be good if all you do is look after your own people is. Well. Amos knew he was never going to be good, anyway, so. ]
Others don't have to be worthless to be irrelevant. You just... don't think about them. That's all. And maybe that means Solvunn isn't good. But as long as they're looking after their own, I figure they're alright. It's good enough.
[ This is all going a lot easier for him now that the conversation has shifted closer towards what Amos actually knows. There are contradictions there, sure; he's a contradictory person. Someone who does not care, cannot care, but feels the need to make the effort regardless. It's futile. He'll never be good enough. Still, he has to try.
For at least as long as he can remember to. Place like this, stranger in a strange world, that might end sooner rather than later.
Nero's also easier to talk to when he's more subdued. Or at least closer to Amos' speed. ]
Yup. There are ways you can live a good life without being a good person. [ Not too long ago he'd had to explain that to someone else, though she was a friend. And receptive, at that. Someone else who needed to know that. ] You do the right thing, help others not die? Even if it's just because someone else asked. Or because you think it's funny. Still did a good thing. That's the only part that really counts.
[ He genuinely believes that, too. Not a whole lot of room for arguing there. Someone makes that the founding principle of their life, it's pretty difficult to break it. ]