Istredd smoothes out Lucifer's shirt from where he had curled his fingers in. Before coming here, there was one thing I did that I wish I could take back. I was caught up in intellectual discovery and believing I was doing the right thing, I was so sure. Now all I can see is how big of a mistake it was.
He hunted down the truth about Cirilla from what he found out from Geralt. It should have been difficult to break apart that information, but his bright and sharp mind jumped the distance to answers. And the more he learned, the more excited he was for what it could all mean. She wasn't a person to him, she was a name on a page, and her destiny was the important thing on the continent. Istredd didn't see it as selling her out to the elves, at the time he believed it would save them, as he promised to do, and it was what she was meant for. He regrets it now, that much is obvious, the regret is pouring out of him. He didn't stop to consider what was the best path, he had to do something, he thought.
His feelings are a bit of a mess right then, a soup of them, and he pulls away from Lucifer, putting the book back where it was supposed to go. How am I supposed to just change the .... There is a pause where Istredd hesitates, stopping in the middle of the sentence, and it's like his mind skitters.
His mood shifts in a second and he starts laughing. It's such a sudden burst that he covers it up, although swallowing it down doesn't change the mixture of amusement in his mind. I was about to ask you, of all people, how was I supposed to change a fundamental personality quality? After months of convincing you how change is good and breaking down your walls.
It's kind of like how Lucifer laughed when he realized how ridiculous it was that back in the day the idea of allowing Istredd in his mind made him threaten him, and now they're permanently connected mentally. Istredd shakes his head, knowing it must have sounded random to the owner. Stop and think, someone says, and the other person laughs at them.
He's really laughing at himself.
But I'm here being stubborn. Like an idiot. I'm sorry.
i'm sorry about who i am more than who he is
He hunted down the truth about Cirilla from what he found out from Geralt. It should have been difficult to break apart that information, but his bright and sharp mind jumped the distance to answers. And the more he learned, the more excited he was for what it could all mean. She wasn't a person to him, she was a name on a page, and her destiny was the important thing on the continent. Istredd didn't see it as selling her out to the elves, at the time he believed it would save them, as he promised to do, and it was what she was meant for. He regrets it now, that much is obvious, the regret is pouring out of him. He didn't stop to consider what was the best path, he had to do something, he thought.
His feelings are a bit of a mess right then, a soup of them, and he pulls away from Lucifer, putting the book back where it was supposed to go. How am I supposed to just change the .... There is a pause where Istredd hesitates, stopping in the middle of the sentence, and it's like his mind skitters.
His mood shifts in a second and he starts laughing. It's such a sudden burst that he covers it up, although swallowing it down doesn't change the mixture of amusement in his mind. I was about to ask you, of all people, how was I supposed to change a fundamental personality quality? After months of convincing you how change is good and breaking down your walls.
It's kind of like how Lucifer laughed when he realized how ridiculous it was that back in the day the idea of allowing Istredd in his mind made him threaten him, and now they're permanently connected mentally. Istredd shakes his head, knowing it must have sounded random to the owner. Stop and think, someone says, and the other person laughs at them.
He's really laughing at himself.
But I'm here being stubborn. Like an idiot. I'm sorry.