I don't trust, but I see right in front of me

[thedevilwhorose]

Who: Lucifer, others
When: May & June
Where: Thorne, Nott, Nocwich, the Horizon
What: OTA prompts and some closed things
Warnings:
Nocwich with Castiel: Cyfaill-induced Problems.
Nocwich with Istredd: A Lot of Blood, animal death, part harvesting, ???? it's a weird thread




I don't know who to betray. ♫
[Will match style.]

Comments

[thedevilwhorose]

[He's forgotten the Beginning.

He's forgotten his involvement. The burn of the Mark ate away at anything bright in his vision and buried away anything good and left him with nothing, that everyone and everything had seen no value left to him.

He pauses his nonsense doodles to shift his hand to stare at his palm and he doesn't remember but he also knows, inherently, that Castiel is right.

Oh.

He wonders if their Father meant for that to happen with the Mark; after all, had to have all the proper fixings and foundations to grow a villain. Retract any nourishment, put in a cold, dark place. Leave for millenia.

He drops his hands over his face to rub quick at his eyes and then flop his arm down away from him.

Anyway they're both going to ignore this conversation having ever happened and it's going to be days or maybe weeks before the true weight of Castiel's 'I admired you' really hits him.

And the rest of it, unraveling among gossamer threads.]

I told Istredd if he had told me months ago I would've laughed at him. Not on purpose. Not to be malicious. Just... Doubt. But at the time even me, as a... person... wouldn't want to lose a friendship over something like the other person falling in love.

[This is the first time he really is struggling to believe they're having this conversation. The problem is the issue is far too close to him and Istredd. He discourages Castiel, he's just in a way discouraging Istredd and himself, isn't he?

So that only leaves encouragement.]

I have heard Dean's scream as I killed you in front of him. ... Which again you somehow survived, you cockroach. [He assumes, anyway, because Jack Knew Castiel, and Jack was literally being born when Lucifer sunk a blade into Castiel's back.] If you really think he's going to just leave you to the wayside, you're a bigger idiot than I am. [Which is saying something.]

If you throw your feelings into a cage you're just being exactly what Dad wanted for us. What's the point of rebelling if you do that?