That's a complicated question, she's gotten over some of it. Not- for herself, but she accepts some people have weird tastes and think this is attractive. But her bar for what people want in a partner is set by people she can't compare herself to. She lets the question linger, face a blank wall of consideration.
"Even if there was, I don't think I could trust it. Not- the way I've seen my friends trust it." As much as it felt great when 'Leif' tugged at her heartstrings, or when Jesper and Mat pulled at her other strings a little lower. She never contemplated they loved her. Not romantically. It wasn't an idea she considered. She didn't see herself tied in knots like Max, or staring across the street longingly like Ginny.
"At home, the only relationship that mattered to me was my friends. More than any guy could hope for, more than even my fucking parents. I had three people and they mostly kept me together. And without them I was a fucking disaster." Abby flopped backward, letting out a long breath, "Here I have new friends, I hope they get to that point. For my fucking sanity. I even sorta have a parent now, and I actually care what she thinks of me. But if any guy came at me with romance in mind, I'd assume there was something wrong with him."
She's being a downer, but that's on Wilhelm asking her a downer question. He really should have known better after all of the shit that got them here that she was a fucked up girl. She didn't apologize for this honesty, it was what he asked for, maybe he can use it for a better answer for himself.
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"Even if there was, I don't think I could trust it. Not- the way I've seen my friends trust it." As much as it felt great when 'Leif' tugged at her heartstrings, or when Jesper and Mat pulled at her other strings a little lower. She never contemplated they loved her. Not romantically. It wasn't an idea she considered. She didn't see herself tied in knots like Max, or staring across the street longingly like Ginny.
"At home, the only relationship that mattered to me was my friends. More than any guy could hope for, more than even my fucking parents. I had three people and they mostly kept me together. And without them I was a fucking disaster." Abby flopped backward, letting out a long breath, "Here I have new friends, I hope they get to that point. For my fucking sanity. I even sorta have a parent now, and I actually care what she thinks of me. But if any guy came at me with romance in mind, I'd assume there was something wrong with him."
She's being a downer, but that's on Wilhelm asking her a downer question. He really should have known better after all of the shit that got them here that she was a fucked up girl. She didn't apologize for this honesty, it was what he asked for, maybe he can use it for a better answer for himself.