[ His brow furrows briefly as Hilda mentions Sylvain and Jesper, something which doesn't seem to compute in this conversation about them before anyone else even gets involved in figuring it out, and said furrow grows deeper when she tries to deny they should care about her for being herself. As if there's some other version of her that either one of them grew to care about instead of the very person standing with her back to them, and no one other than that. Stubbornness keeps his mouth shut in case she has more to say, but it turns out Sylvain does instead as he carefully corrals her back into the conversation's fold.
If Hilda's ends up in his lap he'll reach out long enough to steady her but nothing more in the way of restraints to not keep her from fleeing if that's her next move. And though Sylvain's words aren't meant for him, not really, he still listens closely - and the more he listens the more it unearths a truth to him. A need; it's one Claude hadn't known he possesses until listening to this as it goes on with reassurances he hadn't thought to ask for when they'd talked, but nor had they been offered. This is leagues away from uncertainty. And is it because of what he'd said or hadn't said, or simply because Sylvain wasn't willing to believe the idea of being wanted before, and something through this conversation has changed it?
It's a thought that can wait until later, and Claude shoves it back down beneath everything else when it's not as important as this. By the end of what Sylvain says, he has to think when so much of what the other man's said he agrees with. They could have been the very things he'd say to Hilda if they were having this conversation again and in the same line of thinking as before, perhaps parts of that are what should have been said back in the spa rather than saving them with the belief he'd get to say them to her later. There's a failing here, and it's his for letting her continue to harbor the same doubts despite what they did say to each other.
But - there's more to be added to make it all sink in. If Sylvain won't touch on it beyond this, then he will. ]
If we're playing a game of what ifs here then you've forgotten a few, Hilda. What if you decide you don't want either of us? What if you fall for someone else or even multiple someone elses? I don't think you can say you won't either because none of us can predict the future. Maybe none of this will last forever, or maybe it will. There's no guarantees here. Like Sylvain said, one or all of us could be gone tomorrow since it isn't like we planned to ever even be here in the first place. I don't want to wake up one day, find that's the case, and then have to live with the regret of never trying even if trying ends up meaning having this conversation and nothing else.
The reality is this: neither of us can force you to believe us. There's nothing we can say which will be the perfect words to make it happen. Beyond that, there's only so many times we can tell you whatever we can before you have to decide if you do or not. It's the same in reverse, for the record, because we've both told you you aren't the only one with doubts. But if you always listen for only the negatives, you'll miss what's actually being said.
At some point you have to take a leap and trust someone will be there to catch you, and you're not alone in struggling with that. For a long time in my life... for far too long it felt like there was no one I could ever count on but myself. And then I met you, and then I met the Deer, and then I met Sylvain in a different way than before back in a place which, frankly, should mean nothing in what we're living now because this isn't Fodlan and nothing from there applies. The list goes on from there with everyone we would've never known existed if not for being here.
But this also isn't about either one of us asking you to accept something you can't as it should be all around, too. That's unfair and what I wanted to avoid from the beginning. This is about finding something that works for all of us, not just one or two of us, or whatever it ends up being. If this isn't what you want either now or later on if feelings do change - I don't think either of us will hold that against you. I know I won't. But you should know that if your only reason for saying no now is because you think that by doing so you're doing either of us some sort of favor or kindness: you aren't.
no subject
If Hilda's ends up in his lap he'll reach out long enough to steady her but nothing more in the way of restraints to not keep her from fleeing if that's her next move. And though Sylvain's words aren't meant for him, not really, he still listens closely - and the more he listens the more it unearths a truth to him. A need; it's one Claude hadn't known he possesses until listening to this as it goes on with reassurances he hadn't thought to ask for when they'd talked, but nor had they been offered. This is leagues away from uncertainty. And is it because of what he'd said or hadn't said, or simply because Sylvain wasn't willing to believe the idea of being wanted before, and something through this conversation has changed it?
It's a thought that can wait until later, and Claude shoves it back down beneath everything else when it's not as important as this. By the end of what Sylvain says, he has to think when so much of what the other man's said he agrees with. They could have been the very things he'd say to Hilda if they were having this conversation again and in the same line of thinking as before, perhaps parts of that are what should have been said back in the spa rather than saving them with the belief he'd get to say them to her later. There's a failing here, and it's his for letting her continue to harbor the same doubts despite what they did say to each other.
But - there's more to be added to make it all sink in. If Sylvain won't touch on it beyond this, then he will. ]
If we're playing a game of what ifs here then you've forgotten a few, Hilda. What if you decide you don't want either of us? What if you fall for someone else or even multiple someone elses? I don't think you can say you won't either because none of us can predict the future. Maybe none of this will last forever, or maybe it will. There's no guarantees here. Like Sylvain said, one or all of us could be gone tomorrow since it isn't like we planned to ever even be here in the first place. I don't want to wake up one day, find that's the case, and then have to live with the regret of never trying even if trying ends up meaning having this conversation and nothing else.
The reality is this: neither of us can force you to believe us. There's nothing we can say which will be the perfect words to make it happen. Beyond that, there's only so many times we can tell you whatever we can before you have to decide if you do or not. It's the same in reverse, for the record, because we've both told you you aren't the only one with doubts. But if you always listen for only the negatives, you'll miss what's actually being said.
At some point you have to take a leap and trust someone will be there to catch you, and you're not alone in struggling with that. For a long time in my life... for far too long it felt like there was no one I could ever count on but myself. And then I met you, and then I met the Deer, and then I met Sylvain in a different way than before back in a place which, frankly, should mean nothing in what we're living now because this isn't Fodlan and nothing from there applies. The list goes on from there with everyone we would've never known existed if not for being here.
But this also isn't about either one of us asking you to accept something you can't as it should be all around, too. That's unfair and what I wanted to avoid from the beginning. This is about finding something that works for all of us, not just one or two of us, or whatever it ends up being. If this isn't what you want either now or later on if feelings do change - I don't think either of us will hold that against you. I know I won't. But you should know that if your only reason for saying no now is because you think that by doing so you're doing either of us some sort of favor or kindness: you aren't.