abraxaslogs | When I'm near the end and I just ain't got the time

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When I'm near the end and I just ain't got the time

WHO: Istredd and some people!
WHAT: Istredd is held with Kyle in the dungeons for a bit and questioned, and then let out.
WHERE: Imprisoned and then back out in Thorne
WHEN: July
WARNINGS: Nothing!

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Is that so? It's an honor to have gained his recommendation.

[ Mace makes no attempt to hide his pleasure at hearing that. He slowly rolls the unfinished scroll into proper form as he listens to Istredd's conclusion. ]

A shame. I'm sure soil imbued with the power of the Singularity would have been highly sought after. But we don't need the fools in Cadens digging around there either, do we?

[ It's all spoken with an air betraying the seriousness of the implications. He keeps a good-natured smile plastered on his face, though his brows raise when Istredd asks him point blank about the Singularity. ]

I have the staunch opinion of any good citizen of the Kingdom, including our departed Ambrose; that the Singularity is our duty to protect. But I am less inclined to throw all breathing subjects into its depths in the pursuit of research.

[ He sets the scroll down on the desk, away to the side. His smile, once again, smooths out the rough edges of the topic of mages lost in study. ]

I will gladly offer my assistance in continuing any ongoing projects you have, of course. But Ambrose was, how shall I put it...overzealous at times.

It is very rare, but he also likes your dogs.

[ Istredd likes animals, but his experience with them is limited. He has several pets in the Horizon. Mace's pleasure in having Lucifer's approval is noted and frankly, appreciated. There is a part of him that naturally feels better when people respect his partner. Lucifer hasn't had much of that in his life. ]

I doubt they would think of it. Their distaste in the Singularity makes them blind to its importance.

[ Istredd doesn't know anyone in the Free Cities as interested in studying the Singularity as he does. He knows there is one young woman there who knows it, but he has a particular approach by studying it on a scientific level. The Summoned there were unlikely to get permission to go like he did. He takes advantage of that. ]

I think that is for the best. I assure you, any of your people will likely die, it is not worth it to send them as experiments. Ambrose was foolish to make that mistake more than once.

[ He doesn't like the man and doesn't have to pretend to anymore. But if Mace thought that he did, at least he knows otherwise now. It was purely professional. ]

The Singularity nearly drowned this continent in its displeasure. We must be vigilant. I want to continue my study this winter if you approve.

Edited 2024-08-27 16:12 (UTC)

[ some part of yennefer remembers how suspicious she had been of him at first. how unused to the attention she'd been, how she couldn't conceptualize anyone wanting any part of the girl she had been. hadn't understood why anyone would want, or care, or even notice that piglet. tissaia had, but only so much as to give yennefer the chance to be someone else. istredd, though? he'd looked at her with bright eyes from that very first moment, and that had meant... more than yennefer is still really willing to say. in many ways, the confidence she carries with her now is due in no small part to that first meeting. their continued meetings. the way he'd wanted her when she was at her most unwanted.

and then he'd appeared in thorne, right at yennefer's lowest. when she'd been, once again, scared and in uncertain territory, desperate for an escape from where she found herself, but rather than helpless, she'd been angry, and then istredd had been summoned.

every since, he had been a kind of rock for her. a grounding force that she did not have to parse through, someone where she did not have to worry about layers, about masks, about what has and what hasn't been said. even after she'd gotten access to her chaos back, even after she had all the means to protect herself that she'd been so desperate for before, their partnership had become habit. a familiar, comfortable, welcome part of her everyday life.

and now it was gone.

yennefer hasn't had time to really think of it in terms of loss, in terms of a version of her life that is now gone, because survival had taken first priority. but seeing istredd now, his sadness and also his quiet, and knowing that this isn't real... that, if she wanted, she could manipulate this very cave and each other, because they cannot simply go down to the caves at a whim. they cannot see each other except for when permission is given.

she frowns at the mention of the jail-break, as she shifts ever so slightly to fully align herself against his side. ]

Is that how Sidwell's holding himself, then? Following whims and interests and moving on? [ she snorts, shakes her head. ] I suppose there's a reason Ellya was, supposedly, his favorite niece. [ istredd's comment is heard, and yennefer lets out a breath - a bit like a sigh, a bit like an audible roll of her eyes. yes, okay, she does understand. she gets it. her thought to stay behind had been a poor choice, and really, she is glad to be free of the castle once and for all. but that doesn't help ease whatever it is that roils in her gut now, doesn't make her feel any better knowing that there are any summoned at all still there.

istredd's arm goes around her and he takes her hand in his, and yennefer does let him, almost leans into the touch a bit as he does. she won't admit it as readily as he does, but she also needs the touch. wants his touch. her eyes are on where his thumb runs over her knuckles, her mind spinning a bit with the possibilities of what she should have done differently, what either of them could have done. ]

Would you have stopped it, even if we did? [ her brow arches a little as she glances at him, genuinely curious. ]

A man of taste.

[ Mace's pride in his dogs is well-known even before his timely promotion. He leans down to rub the head of the nearest hound who tilts its head up into the pet. ]

No, but the less we have them sniffing about it, the better.

[ It's a dismissive remark, Mace's focus is clearly elsewhere when it comes to the Singularity. With the now King Sidwell in charge, a greater force might be ready to meet any challenge or thread The Free Cities pose to it. ]

I'm glad you agree, Istredd. People are our most valuable resource.

[ He pulls his hand away from his dog and rests it on the desk with a sigh. ]

It's such a shame he lost sight of that.

[ Mace shakes his head slowly, ensuring that Istredd can see him lamenting the sordid actions of his predecessor. It only lasts for a few seconds. He perks up quickly and claps his hands together. ]

But! You may consider this your approval. I will write up something formally, sealed and all. Just keep me in the loop as needed, will you?

I agree. I'd rather they keep dismissing it.

[ The less attention the better when it comes to a group hostile to something important. Istredd is used to people brushing off things that he personally deems valuable information. It happened frequently in his sphere and while it grated at him, in the end it led him to having information that should not have been publicly known. And he kept it a secret after finding out the truth. ]

I will, thank you for your understanding. But related to people, you must understand my concern for my own.

[ Istredd sees the Summoned as his people first and foremost. Not the Thorne subjects, although he's become fond of many of the natives around here, he knows most people in the area are just trying to live their lives. He worked hard at keeping everyone alive and ready to escape the safe room. He doesn't lack care for Thorne natives just ... his priority is very clear. ]

Considering Ambrose is gone, did he take with him the knowledge of the Summoning spell? Please understand I do not doubt your skills, but as a professional mage myself, I am concerned with what that spell requires. I know through what I was told that in the start, Ambrose made mistakes with the Summoning spell, and the Summoned are who suffered for it. I hope you will be more conscientious about it.

[ They're each other's constants and have been since they were practically children. Istredd will always think of himself as hers, that a part of him was formed so solidly because of her that she lives under his skin permanently. They were the two chosen of their mentors, the rising stars who were outsiders at the same time, and they found something beautiful in the midst of all the pain and cruelty surrounding them.

By coming here, Istredd has become what he never wanted to be. He's part of a court. He deals with royals every day and constant politics and drama. He is a figurehead with the Summoned and puts in effort to look after others, to put their lives and needs before his own. It's a far cry from the archaeologist who forged his own path and spent every day of his life solitary and focused on his curiosities. He cares deeply for the Summoned but he misses the freedom associated with his life before. There was so much less weighing him down.

Yennefer shared the load and they worked well together. If he hadn't been taken by Vilgefortz, he knows he would have stayed with the survivors with her and helped redo the mages too. But for all the logical reasons that he is going to miss her counsel, the gut feeling he has is dismay at losing her in general. He doesn't want space between them. ]

I don't think he's anything like Ellya. He is very shrewd and purposeful. I think he's been planning this for quite some time. Probably around the time of Libertas.

[ Which is not a great deal of time, but enough to start putting things in motion, certainly. She proved unstable and it was not a wise military act. Sidwell needed time and reasons to convince people to his side over his childless niece. Istredd's impressed, to be truthful, in a general sort of way.

But Yennefer's question is an interesting one and he considers before responding. He kisses her knuckles, one at a time, as he runs it through his mind as different options. Ellya staying. There are ups and downs of each option. He's been thinking about this for a long time because members of the Summoned have talked about a coup as well. ]

I think he's more dangerous for the world at large. Any chance at peace he's squashed. He means to dominate the other territories. I don't have a sense for any of his opinions about us or the Singularity, so he's a harder read.

[ So would he stop it? Probably. The danger you know and live with, like Ellya, could be better than the other potential. ]

[ Mace is unsurprisingly eager to acknowledge his predecessor's own failings. His eyes still narrow slightly as he considers his answer, but it doesn't take long. ]

It is my intention to leave a different mark on the history of Thorne. Even though Ambrose believes he took his most valuable knowledge with him when he fled, I've studied what we have on the Summoning spell.

[ Mace extends a hand out as if in welcoming. ]

You will see not only your future colleagues ushered in safely, but met with far greater hospitality than before. He was limiting himself with ancient texts and quite frankly ignoring the possibilities right in front of him. This will be a new era for us all.

Edited 2024-09-12 04:21 (UTC)

Ciri sighs. At least he knows it...

"You really have a talent for it, Istredd."

She's not angry with him. Just... sad. Frustrated. Upset. At the situation in general: Nero's loss, the inability to use their unique traits to actually help the people who are falling sick, the worry about the changes going on within the Summoned and what it means in the long term for those of them who've genuinely decided to stay.

Istredd may have learned by now she's liable to lash out when she's stressed. In this case, it isn't even his fault.

"I'm not sure how I feel about the Singularity's favoritism. I don't like the idea that our destiny is determined by the thing. Set on the path of... what? Those shared dreams we had within the crater? These changes we're experiencing have been going on for some time, but after all that, it's really become more obvious, hasn't it?"

"I know, I know." Istredd shrugs. "I promise it's not on purpose." Ciri knows that by now. He's never been good with people. He has more practice recently because of Thorne and his place with the Summoned, but it doesn't come naturally. He says the right thing more often than the wrong now, but she makes him nervous.

He has picked up on her lashing out, and he's hoping it isn't personal. She didn't stomp off, she's talking instead about what's going on and her feelings about it. That he's more comfortable with.

"The New Gods were like us once, I feel confident about that now. They're the former Summoned, if Umbvagher is implying what I think." This has been a theory of Istredd's for a long time, and frankly, he does enjoy being right, but it doesn't mean it feels right. He liked his fake life so much that he didn't want to wake up out of it. Lucifer had to force him out.

"I think that is our future. And I wouldn't know how to stop it even if I wanted to. The Singularity is far more powerful than any one of us." Ciri's always had a destiny. He has no idea if this was always supposed to be a part of it. "You've been a child of prophecy, I know it's not your preference. I wish there was a way to make this all a choice for us."

[ constants, that she supposes some part of her should prepared to see the end of. yennefer had very little in her life that she ever kept, so little she allowed herself, knowing that some day it would be stripped from her. she should have planned for this day, had something built and prepared for when it all came tumbling down. should have had a plan to take those with her, when their time came.

instead, she watches istredd and knows the corner he finds himself. knows the responsibility he takes for himself, alone, no matter who else he might be among in the castle. it feels familiar, somehow, knowing there are other summoned and other people and yet here, in this space and with him, they all fall away. his lips press to her knuckles and she can only watch him as he does, tries to memorize the lines of his face, remembers who they had once been and all that they have traversed to be here. ]

They're all the same, to some degree. Royals. [ it's an attempt at humor, a kind of sharp, judgemental, familiar tone. it's meant to hide her real worry, her distrust of the entire ordeal and whatever calm istredd might be finding for himself there. she knows he isn't stupid, as much as she might argue otherwise, but-

gods. it's hard to even imagine him down there. hard to imagine that this is any place that might have found themselves. she watches as his mind works, knowing that the question would be one he would have to consider, and with his answer she finds herself humming. ]

It's hard to imagine anyone on this continent ignoring us, or the Singularity, considering recent events. [ a beat, a moment where yennefer considers all the questions she's wanted to ask, but had been too angry to voice, before she lets out another breath. ] And what of his wife?

I have always been concerned with the nature of the spell. It is dangerous to tamper with time and space to rip people out of other spheres. I hope you approach it with more caution than he did.

[ Istredd isn't certain that he believes that Mace will, if he sees only limitations and considers the possibilities rather than the dangers. He is young and Istredd is old in comparison, so he's not certain that he feels better about this. Ambrose was always foolish and dangerous in his eyes. All he can do is hope this time is different. What else is there to do? Istredd has no authority in this place and it's a new regime. ]

If you need help or knowledge from an outside magic perspective, I am available to you. I want to make Thorne as safe as it can be.

[ If he can make himself an asset, he can protect the Summoned better. Istredd hopes that the offer softens his critical statement of Ambrose's mistakes before. ]

You would know. I escaped a life at court. [ Istredd kisses her palm. ] At a very high cost, but all the same.

[ He means her, of course. He planned on going to a court to be with her, against all of his own interests and desires. Something he would have probably grown to resent, thus why they were unlikely to make it as young mages moving up in the world. At the time, as a romantic fool, he couldn't fathom that, but they know it now. It took coming here for the two of them to be able to be the team they probably always should have been. Life has twists and turns, and they've adapted as best they can.

These are the only royals he's truly dealt with and he loathes them, honestly. The ones before, the ones now. Istredd hopes that there are, somewhere, decent enough royalty, but he doubts their sphere or this one is capable of popping them out. Dark worlds with a lot of trouble doesn't pop out a lot of good people in general. Only those who find a way to survive.

He's in a sad mood and his mind is going to that sadness. She's right in front of him and he still misses her. He reaches out to stroke her hair, dark strands between his fingers. Their bond still works in Nott so she'll be able to reach out if she needs him, but he won't be able to come running the same way. He'll have to trust Stephen and Thancred to do that. ]

They have yet to use the Summoning spell without Ambrose. I'm very concerned about that.

[ Ambrose was already stupid and reckless and Istredd is positive the spell is bad for this world, as he's been saying almost from the start of coming here. The concept of the spell is foolish. But now with the book gone, he's positive Thorne will keep attempting anyway, and possibly get it wrong. He is not looking forward to whatever comes from this. Hopefully nothing serious. If Mace has been watching him all this time, perhaps he's copied the spell accurately. ]

The people like her, she shows concern and interest in the poor and common citizens. A good contrast to a stern military king. She helped kill the King so I assume she's as bloodthirsty as he is.

"There is always a choice."

This, she must believe in. Even if there is nothing else. In the dreamed-up future they'd 'lived,' suspended for weeks in the Singularity's crater, she had been herself in some ways Destiny. But she had also done her best to cling to her humanity, to her own freedom, and allow it for others. She'd opened doors -- but rarely made anyone step through outside their own volition.

And this is exactly the path she'd chosen in that dream too. The very reason she'd fought for decades, centuries to break free from the Singularity, to allow them all the option of leaving if they wanted to, alongside Viktor.

In this moment, she can see that future unfolding. She can see herself making similar mistakes.

Ciri closes her eyes a few moments longer than a blink.

"If any of the former Summoned turned 'new gods' have any shred of their humanity left, I wonder what they would choose. Are they stuck here like the rest of us? Like we were in that dream? Where does the Singularity's will come from? It has one, for all that it's a big fucking rock. What need has it of us?"

[ The lecture does not go beyond him, but the new High Mage chooses to believe it's more of an admonishment of Ambrose than a warning. Mace brings a hand to his chest and gives a short bow. ]

My ambitions don't revolve around seeing how many new Summoned I can collect, I assure you. [ The truth of the statement is irrefutable. ] Though given recent developments, we will be looking to recruit a few more souls in the coming months. But I believe our new King and Queen will be more practical in their own requests.

[ When he straightens, his smile regains some warmth. ]

A kind offer! One I will assuredly call you on. Now, is there anything else I can help you with? Else I still have a mess ahead of me, as you can well see.

[ One of the dogs huffs. ]

"I think they are stuck here like we were. Umbvagher is one of them and he chose to show us it, I think it's from personal experience." He was once a Summoned like them, became a god, and now is stuck there after thousands of years that pass. It makes the most sense, and explains why a god was displaying knowledge of other world's language.

"Lucifer explained to me that he was using symbols called emojis that are from his world, and some others said the same. He was communicating in a way that only made sense if he was from a different sphere once." That is what Istredd took as proof that the theory was correct, and then the vision happened and it seemed like it was the answers they were seeking. The problem being that now the only answers are ones they don't necessarily want to hear.

"I wonder if he showed us that to explain where we are headed ... but perhaps also as a chance to stop it from happening." It's hard to know the temperament of a god that seemed to play games. Istredd feels like knowing their future so early, centuries away from them now, gives an opportunity.

"The Singularity ... I wish I knew. No one is more disappointed than me that I've studied it for years with no clear answers as to its abilities." Istredd has been doing his level best, but it won't talk to him. "I wonder if we have become symbiotic, it gives us power but perhaps we give it back too."

[ That ... may be a decent thing to hear. Someone would arguably want to recruit as many new people as they can to impress their employer. He will have to wait and see if Mace is telling the truth at the next Summoning. He respectfully bows. ]

No. Thank you for your time, High Mage.

[ And he leaves, eyeing the dogs on his way out. ]

Did you? Because you're still wrapped up in it from where I'm sitting- and it feels a lot like my doing.

[ again, is what she doesn't say. again is what she feels. and yes, she knows istredd has made his own decisions. has brought himself to his own places of his own free will. it's selfish of her to feel like she is the only reason he has ended up where he has. istredd has made his own choices that have brought him to his own places, he chose his own paths. but in the face of it all, in the shadow of it all, she feels it curl in her gut.

it doesn't help that she can feel the sadness in him, knows that for all that he tells her things are fine, that he will be fine (because they always are, in the end. they have to be) he still carries that dark sadness in him.

his fingers move to her hair, fiddling with curls, with the dark locks, and yennefer shifts - settling more firmly, comfortly, against him. its her way of encouraging it, hungry for the physical touch of him even when she knows this is all just the illusion. ]

Ambrose left with that knowledge, then. Or some version of it. I doubt it'll be that way forever, he had too many mages in audience each Summoning for it to be secret for much longer.

[ part of her thinks that if she could just track down ambrose and destroy the book, maybe that would save them all some heartache. but she knows it wouldn't be that simple, knows the consequences would continue to spiral outward from there. but it doesn't stop her from wanting. doesn't stop her from needing some kind of outlet, somewhere. ]

From what I've heard, she's the one who did the late king in. Though she's got her own pet mage who I'm sure was a large part of it.

I did it for you to start, but I've made this as much my own choice.

[ Istredd hated courts but he did play the game for her when he first got here. He followed her instructions, did as she suggested, became a teacher, provided support for her. That was even before they reunited romantically. He got involved in Thorne to be the partner she needed, but eventually it was his own actions that led him here. He became a central point of contact for the Summoned. He helped Rhy with the parties which put him in the court's view and his research with Ambrose made him valuable to the mage.

This is the path he chose, something he has been weighted down by more frequently lately, but it isn't on her shoulders. He's had his opportunities to walk away or to take a step back. And he chose to stay while pushing her to leave. There's no one to blame for the situation they're in now but the Sidwells. Who he has to live with and around now, resenting every breath that they take in. Istredd was never a fan of the past royals, but he thinks he prefers them. The Sidwells are too smart. They're dangerous. ]

I'm sure they have a version. Their pet mage is in charge now, I doubt they'd do that if they didn't have the spell down.

[ It would be stupid to make that mistake and they are not that. He sighs and looks at her, reaching out to touch her face, pull her in closer to him. ]

I miss you. I'm pathetic. [ Istredd smiles faintly at her. ] I got too spoiled with you nearby at all times.

[ He's saying out loud what he already knows to be true. It's not logical for him to feel like a part of himself has broken away but that is the truth of living without her nearby. For two years they had the kind of relationship that he used to dream about when they were young, that's all. He has to remind himself that romantic dreams don't always work out. Or at the least, it will until they get that future they saw for themselves, when they could be everything.

He cups her face in his hands and draws her into a kiss. It is long and lingering and building in passion because the next time he gets one won't be promised for tomorrow or the day after. Her taste, her smell, it'll all be out of his system in the castle before long, and he'll have other avenues to get it again but he's being petty about that detail. ]

I love you with all of my heart, Yenna. You know that, yes? There is nothing I wouldn't do for you.

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When I'm near the end and I just ain't got the time

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