satanicpanics: (pic#16020735)
š”ˆš””š””š”¦š”¢ š”š”²š”«š”°š”¬š”« ([personal profile] satanicpanics) wrote in [community profile] abraxaslogs 2024-12-08 05:52 am (UTC)

I don’t hear you denying it. And Steve, there are only so many eloquent ways I can put it. Freak fraternizer? Loser smoocher?

[ He is well aware none of it is his best work, thank you very much, but he laughs at himself regardless. He’s too happy and too content to think up something more clever (though ā€œfreak fraternizerā€ isn’t half bad, you have to admit), and it really is incredible how in the span of moments, everything can suddenly be made right. Things haven’t felt right for a long time.

The last year has been more difficult than Eddie will ever admit, with event after event just stacking up to an unbearable weight. The eternal threat of a war that never seems to come, all the bullshit the gods seem to be stirring up, and even just bearing witness to the way Nero’s death has so deeply affected Steve.

Then there was the crater. The way it sparked a fear of abandonment in him that he’s sure was never quite so blatant before, and the way his brain kept playing tricks on him long afterwards, when again and again he’d think about reaching for Steve’s hand but he’d stop himself because the knot in the pit of his stomach would remind him that what they’d experienced wasn’t real no matter what Clarisse La Rue said—

And sure, most of those things aren’t gone. The gods and war and his fear of being left alone haven’t disappeared just because two guys got their shit together, but in the grand scheme of things? They don’t feel quite so crushing anymore.
]

Yeah, well, it’s kind of the least you can do considering this is all your fault, Steve.

[ He grins wickedly, but he’s not being totally dishonest. He’s convinced that if he tried to stand now, he’d fold at the knees like a newborn deer, and that feeling isn’t going away anytime soon.

The gap between them is getting a little too large for Eddie’s liking, and he chases that stolen kiss, leaning back in as Steve leans away in an attempt to close it. He begins to say something, or begins to laugh about the comment about the Pontiac, but Steve steals his breath away for a second time (but they’re not counting), and whatever it was, it’s not so important anymore.

He melts into the kiss, revels in the feeling of Steve’s hand in his hair, or on his jaw, and the thrill of being allowed to touch him without be afraid of what might happen. And as they lock together, he comes to the immediate conclusion that he’s never going to be able to live without this again and it would be cruel to deprive him of it.

Though he can’t help but think, now that Steve brings it up...making out in the back of a Pontiac could easily be a newfound lifelong dream of Eddie’s as well.
]

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