[ It's almost too easy to forget for a moment that they aren't still in danger. He stops placing little kisses on Viktor so that he can look at him, a hand still at his cheek. ]

I know. [ a beat ] I think I felt it.

[ Viktor's fear and then his relief, right as Kyle came back to consciousness. He brushes his thumb over Viktor's cheek again, a crease at his brow and a flicker of doubt as he processes all the pieces of this conversation. ]

- you know that I'm only grateful, right? You saved me. [ If Viktor feels any guilt over the method he used, the side effect of whatever connection they shared for a brief moment - there's no reason for it in Kyle's mind. He cups his cheek again, speaking in a hushed tone. ]

I've cheated death many, many times now. I thought I only survived because god still has some purpose for me, and I've struggled each time to understand why. [ Why him and not his family - and beyond that, what Parfir even wants of him in this world. He thought he saw the signs of his will again in Viktor's domain, tried to offer himself in that way, and found it rejected. He's been thinking about that. He closes his eyes now. ]

But maybe I'm just allowed to live. [ Maybe this is a weak man's way out, but it's not exactly a new realization. It's been a while since he last called himself Kahlil, he no longer guards the Rifter's black sword, and he has not been called back to Basawar. Even if he was - it would be to step back into his other self's life, and he doesn't want that, if he ever did. ]

I'm afraid of losing you too. [ To the dangers here, to Viktor's future - his choices once he returns to Zaun. But he tries to focus on the present. ]

I've loved this life. I love you.

[ Maybe it's okay for him to say it now. ]