[ it always does come down to power. power and control. those have been the deciding factor's in yennefer's own life, absolutes that she has followed, that she works within, whether it be the courts or her own magic or the chaos of a budding war. here, too, it comes down to those simple elements - those simple truths. thorne wishes to study the singularity, to understand its power, for what will in the end by their own gains. yennefer had made the direct decision to join the queen's court to remain close to her, to have that connection with the woman with the most power in the castle, so that she would at the very least remain informed.
because thancred's not wrong - yennefer has had many direct audiences with the queen. has been brought into conversations of court (though more as a listener than anything else). has been forced to prove that loyalty in a way that even now, yennefer cannot stop thinking about, that she sees every night when it gets too quiet. when she does her best not to think of geralt.
stephen is not wrong. it is the us that she is most worried about. but it is more specific than that, and when thancred looks to her with his tight eyes, his heavy tone, she holds the eye contact - her own mouth pressed into a thin line. this is the decision she has to make - because here, she could simply stop, her reasons and her theories and her why already explained. she knows the queen to be the biggest threat to the summoned, so she has decided to remain close. to keep an eye on it, on them, on thorne, when so many others chose to run.
yennefer holds thancred's eyes for another moment, geralt's voice still ringing in the back of her mind. not everyone has to offer power before you find their help worthwhile. stephen, thancred, they've offered her something arguably much more important than power. much more rare. they know of her magic, they know of her choices, they have spent the last few weeks with her, and not lady yennefer the venerable.
her eyes glance over to stephen, and then back again. takes the risk. ]
There is someone here, in Abraxas, who is very important to me. [ even now, yennefer can't help the way her chest tightens, the fear of even mentioning ciri making it a little hard to breathe. but this is also the first time she's talking about this, the first time she's giving words to this at all, to someone who wasn't geralt. ] She has great power, power she's brought with her from our sphere, power enough to rival the Singularity, at times. The exact kind of power that the Queen would want for herself. [ yennefer's hands clench at her side into fists, her jaw tight. is this even the right decision? is this even the right point? she doesn't know, but it's too late now.
( and if she can't trust stephen and thancred, who does she have left? ) ]
I will not let Ellya get to her. I won't. [ a beat, and then. ] That is why I haven't left.
no subject
because thancred's not wrong - yennefer has had many direct audiences with the queen. has been brought into conversations of court (though more as a listener than anything else). has been forced to prove that loyalty in a way that even now, yennefer cannot stop thinking about, that she sees every night when it gets too quiet. when she does her best not to think of geralt.
stephen is not wrong. it is the us that she is most worried about. but it is more specific than that, and when thancred looks to her with his tight eyes, his heavy tone, she holds the eye contact - her own mouth pressed into a thin line. this is the decision she has to make - because here, she could simply stop, her reasons and her theories and her why already explained. she knows the queen to be the biggest threat to the summoned, so she has decided to remain close. to keep an eye on it, on them, on thorne, when so many others chose to run.
yennefer holds thancred's eyes for another moment, geralt's voice still ringing in the back of her mind. not everyone has to offer power before you find their help worthwhile. stephen, thancred, they've offered her something arguably much more important than power. much more rare. they know of her magic, they know of her choices, they have spent the last few weeks with her, and not lady yennefer the venerable.
her eyes glance over to stephen, and then back again. takes the risk. ]
There is someone here, in Abraxas, who is very important to me. [ even now, yennefer can't help the way her chest tightens, the fear of even mentioning ciri making it a little hard to breathe. but this is also the first time she's talking about this, the first time she's giving words to this at all, to someone who wasn't geralt. ] She has great power, power she's brought with her from our sphere, power enough to rival the Singularity, at times. The exact kind of power that the Queen would want for herself. [ yennefer's hands clench at her side into fists, her jaw tight. is this even the right decision? is this even the right point? she doesn't know, but it's too late now.
( and if she can't trust stephen and thancred, who does she have left? ) ]
I will not let Ellya get to her. I won't. [ a beat, and then. ] That is why I haven't left.