abraxaslogs | [ OPEN ] hide your love, don't be shy

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[ OPEN ] hide your love, don't be shy

Who: Claude and you!
When: all throughout August and September
Where: Cadens (pre-Nocwich), the Horizon (any time), and Libertas (post-Nocwich)
What: Catch all for both months
Warnings: For anything referencing Libertas: death, violence, and war

( Open and closed starters in the comments! Also good with prose or brackets and if you'd like to plot something more specific, you can find me at

indech, arboria#1862, or by PM at any time. )

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[ There's a tilt of his head that passes for a shrug: he doesn't much care about how people feel towards the Free Cities—or the factions as a whole. Anyone who's tossed their loyalty into that pool has made their bed. And that's not his problem. But it's true he goes out of his way to avoid those who seem to keen on supporting the army. ]

So it seems. [ Can't run a war with a starving platoon. But that isn't why he asked. It's because Ciri had told him she was accompanied by three others. Geralt had not asked their names—he trusts she's discerning about who she does a job with.

But now that he's faced with one potential, he finds himself curious.

He straightens up. ] Heard one of the caravans came upon a rift in the earth.

[ Huh. The rift is quite clearly what their caravan ran into, though rather than only ("only") a rift it'd reminded him a bit more of the canyons he's seen, but Geralt's mentioning it is enough to pique Claude's curiosity even more. ]

Ours certainly did.

[ He peers up at Geralt while putting away the samples, and with the vials now secure stands once more to dust his gloves off to the side away from either of them. Better safe than sorry if the flowers' ability to poison extends to their pollen, and also better to avoid any cross-contamination of what he might offer the apothecaries or alchemists in town.

A simple process of elimination here: he'd really only told Petra and Sylvain about his travels so that leaves his other companions as potential links. Nothing about the journey was top secret from start to finish and he'd already assumed word would spread - if not by mouth then by horizon contact, convenient as it is - so it's more about the knowledge of connecting who knows who to each other through this that Claude's interested in. ]

I take it you know someone I was traveling with, though there's quite a few options there between the four of us who went and... well, the rest of the soldiers.

[ He leans a shoulder against one of the rare low hanging trees that dot the landscape. It's true he may have heard from the soldiers eventually, if not Ciri. He's not gone out of his way to make friends with them, but they patrol the desert and he's found it simpler to keep matters cordial.

Besides, soldiers will pay, too, for a monster killed. ]

Ciri. [ Had they met for the first time on this journey? Or were they familiar prior? It isn't technically relevant, but when it comes to Ciri, he tends to want to know more than he doesn't. ]

She mentioned it on her way home. An unusual disturbance.

[ There's something to it, perhaps, in how he says home instead of back. ] ]

[ Home instead of back, returning, Cadens, any number of other descriptions which could be used for the end of a journey is noted, and Claude contemplates that. Geralt's been here for a long time, he recalls, and Ciri mentioned a year. Perhaps with enough time it will feel like home. It's not a concept Claude's unfamiliar with, even if the execution of being here is much different than moving to somewhere else in his life before.

Something else also comes to mind with this new connection, but first what they found being described with neat brevity gets a short laugh from him. ]

Unusual is certainly a good word for it, considering it seemed to be nothing I've seen before. I'm starting to think that description counts for less and less given how much I've never seen before, [ a wave to the plant he's still standing by, as one more example of so very many, ] but the soldiers were surprised to see a ravine where the map didn't have one marked. That makes it all the more of an oddity, I should think.

But it's funny, I would've said Jesper if I had to guess who you knew since he seems to know just about everyone. Though now that I think about it, I've seen you and Ciri around together here and there. Have you both been here about the same amount of time?

[ Just curious. ]

I am being very impressed by how much you have remembered— it is very like the real thing.

[She almost says 'home,' but all things considered, Garreg Mach hasn't felt like that for some time— and she would rather not touch on their divergent memories at the moment. Here, they are quite literally a world away from all of that. They should have the chance to enjoy being so awhile longer before they must touch on reality again.

Petra bites back another smile, shaking her head.]

Linhardt would be waking up if he thought he could be telling either of them how to do something more efficiently. He is not even a physical fighter, and he would be critiquing my form every chance he got.

[On its surface, it's a complaint, but there's warmth to it, as well. Those were simpler times for them all.]

The Officer's Academy is being as I remembered.

[ No. It would not be on any map, because Geralt's travelled far enough he'd have noticed it, too, last time he was out that way. He had not. Which is foreboding to say the least, but bloodshed has often brought with it harbingers. Isn't that what they claim? Not that he believes in that shit, and yet. ]

We're familiar, too. [ Jesper does indeed know every fucking one. Can't keep his mouth shut. Jesper, Claude, Ciri. Who's the fourth? Hm. ] About. She's from my sphere.

[ It had been a thing. Ciri showing up after he'd thought her dead, after he'd believed he was too late to find her. He recalls not ever remembering having met her before, and now he has memories of raising her, and then their memories here together both before and after. Feels like it's been years and months at the same time.

He at least doesn't appear to mind speaking of Ciri; what hesitations he might've had lay in the past. Most know what she is to him now. Hard to hide when they share a home, when he trains her still, hunts with her on occasion, and after Nocwich? Half of them have seen him dance with her. ]

Edited 2022-10-05 22:56 (UTC)

Linhardt would critique all of us over anything if only given the chance. It's a good thing he's not here, or else he'd be telling Sylvain how he didn't get the heights of the outer walls right among whatever else comes to mind.

[ He's kidding, kind of, since after bringing up Lysithea: she would do the same thing. Or really, most of the Deer would given how bluntly honest they are. Yet another thing Claude misses, but at least Sylvain and Petra can be counted on for that in their own ways.

Don't think he's forgotten his half-hearted attempt to get some Derdriu sympathy being shut down. (Claude will, however, conveniently forget that was his own doing.) ]

Though... I wonder what would happen if someone else from Fodlan showed up here. [ This is probably not a door he should open, but too late for that now. ] Elsewhere, specifically, so then they show up in the Horizon and surprise, here's Garreg Mach. Kind of like how we showed up here, but maybe even more confusing.

[ The cat starts to squirm so Claude leans to set it down gently onto the ground, and it runs off with a trill. ]

In search of something from the dining hall, maybe?

[ Claude grins a bit at we're familiar, something he doesn't doubt for a second after - well, spending any amount of time around Jesper. He's not sure the teen knows the meaning of the word stranger. That suits him just fine considering he's much the same. ]

Is your home considered a sphere?

[ He's only slightly kidding about this since it's the first time he's heard someone use that term in regards to where they're from, but - if so, he'll be careful to use it from here on out.

Still: 'about' and 'from' are things more important his mind latches onto, a combination that draws it in. It could, if he bends it, fit to describe whatever it is that sums up the mismatches in his memory versus Petra's versus Sylvain's. The association is weak, but that's what's on his mind as Claude studies Geralt, very obviously weighing something back and forth while he debates on whether to say anything. It sounds odd enough to his own ears, not that he's really said it aloud; what will it sound like to someone else's?

In the end, a potential chance to learn something else wins out as it always does. Here comes a non-sequitur born out of this gamble. ]

Do you both... well, remember the same things about what you left before coming here?

[ Sylvain shudders in horror at the very idea. Yeah, he's been on the end of Lindhardt's critiques before. He'll pass, thanks. ] No offense, Petra, but I'm really grateful we got you here instead of Lindhardt.

[ Claude's ponder gets a quiet hum from him, however, as he lets his gaze drift over the familiar structure. Stretching his arms behind his head, he makes a face. ]

Well. Maybe that will be a good thing. We'll be easy to find, even if they get pulled somewhere else. Hopefully it's someone we want to be found by.

[ There are Options there that maybe they'd rather not be. However, it's probably wiser to stick together, even if it does complicate things. Although that does have another issue popping up in his mind as he glances between the two of them. ]

What do we do if someone does end up in one of the other cities instead?

[ One eyebrow lifts. ] Is yours a cube?

[ All worlds are spheres, as far as he's aware. He's yet to find anyone who comes from an irregularly shaped world. Perhaps one day. He's encountered stranger things as of late.

Claude seems to have something on his mind, though; Geralt watches, but does not interrupt. When it comes, he only nods. Mm. Sometimes he's been here so fucking long, he's forgotten that the discrepancy can be...a new experience. ]

No. [ A gulf of years exists between he and Ciri. He isn't the only one, either. How it works, he's not learned, but in some ways he isn't sure it makes a difference. Not for him. Not now that they have made their decision to stay here. They don't need to know if they've no intention of returning to their respective homes or places in time or however the fuck it's meant to be. If that's even possible. Nothing is ever so simple.

There's likely only one reason Claude is asking, though. ] You found friends.

[ For a second Claude does nothing but stare. A cube? Is that really a thing? Asking himself this then makes the unsaid context behind 'sphere' sink in very belatedly and, well. Nothing to do but laugh at that and himself. ]

Okay, you got me there. Ours is certainly also a sphere based on the globes used by researchers, but we don't usually refer to the world by the shape. More like by country or continent, if anything.

[ He'll shrug that off though not without another chuckle at his own expense first. It's a good thing to get some humor in since hearing Geralt and Ciri don't recall the same things is both a comfort and anything but. It leaves him with more questions, but he nods slowly in response. ]

I knew them from the same academy we all attended, but we ended up on different sides of the war. One of them comes from the morning of something I lived months ago, and the other knows of something that never happened for me. If it had, it would've changed everything about what happened. Nothing I did would've then been possible.

[ That's the least complicated explanation he knows how to give, especially given that he does consider them friends despite everything. Sometimes that's the hardest part to reconcile now, something increasingly weighing on his mind the longer they go without talking about it all. But - can't change the past if that's what it is, and they're here now to deal with it.

At some point Claude's gaze shifted to the desert out before them, but now he glances back at Geralt and adds dryly, ] Hopefully your situation is also that delightfully uncomplicated.

[ There isn't much time to discuss, and whether or not Claude is speaking with true confidence or a bravado borne of necessity, Steve isn't going to question it. This wouldn't be the first time that he's relied on a teammate's magic, as Wanda has propelled him around with the sheer force of her hex energy a number of times in the past.

If the worst happens and he falls through the floor anyway, it probably won't be the end of the world. He'll find a way back up. All the same, as Steve backs up to give himself room for a running start, he does brace himself for that unfortunate scenario — which would mean a hard and potentially painful landing.

He watches as Claude's hands begin to take on a translucent green glow, an indication that he's readying the spell. It's so different from what Wanda and Strange do, but Steve's starting to realize that magic can take all sorts of forms.

What matters is how they use it here and now.

He meets Claude's gaze with an unwavering look of his own and then takes off at breakneck speed toward the gap, leaping from the floor at the last second to launch himself across. A split second later, as he nears the other side, he feels a lightness to his steps where he should be landing, as if he's stepped on air. The force of the spell pushes him forward, and suddenly it's like when he was new to the serum and could barely control how fast he was — meaning he does slam into the shut door.

He hears a startled yelp from the other side as he recovers from a brief moment of being dazed from the impact. He looks back to Claude across the way and sends him a quick salute before returning his attention to the door and whoever's trapped behind it. ]

We're gonna get you out of there, just hold on! [ He has to force the door open, and then he's met with — as expected — a pile of debris blocking him from the rest of the room and the person stuck inside. ]

[ For all intents and purposes, to those who live upon it, the Continent on his world is the only continent which matters beyond sparse instances of trading. The others are small, located a long ways across two seas. Even he's never travelled there. What would be the point? Months-long journey, possibly more. Waste of his time.

But it isn't important, so he doesn't mention it. His attention is instead on what Claude is saying. A casual enough explanation—except the part where Claude says never happened for me. His head tilts. That's new. That's different. A gap of years, he's heard of that. A discrepancy is something else altogether. It isn't that the concept is foreign. Theories of...alternative versions, he's spoken to one or two about it. He's just never met anyone who's experienced it in Abraxas itself. ]

Mm. Just about as. [ How does one reconcile an event that never occurred to someone you knew? It would be as though he met Jaskier, but a Jaskier who did not know him to have gone to Rinde and met Yennefer. (A Yennefer who had not betrayed him.) ]

You're saying they know you to have made a different choice.

[ It works - this is what sticks in Claude's mind the most even if he also follows it with a wince as Steve hits a rather solid remaining part of the structure on when he lands. Later, all that effort of getting across on Steve's part being so effortless will register with him, probably raise some questions but for now: hot damn, his spell didn't fail.

This is, however, only celebrated behind that mask of concentration as he gets up and dusts his trousers off with focus immediately back on their goal of helping whoever is trapped. As Steve calls out a reassurance, Claude's looking around to see if he can get across. He has faith in his agility, but that is a sizable gap.

Steve forcing the door open redoubles his efforts, because now it also occurs to Claude that if the other's able to get through the debris, and whether it's one person or several trapped behind it, they're going to need to find a way to bring them out of the building. ]

I'm going to look for a way back around to there, [ he calls over to Steve and without waiting to see if the other man heard him, it's off to his search.

The other end of the hallway from where they'd hopped up from the floor below doesn't seem promising at first. There's more collapsed beams, walls, rubble he has to climb past or over. Claude's progress is slow, much slower than he'd hoped it'd be, thanks to making sure whatever he steps on is solid or if it'll give away beneath his weight as he goes. Eventually he makes it to a turn in the hallway, but it's a dead end based on more walls having fallen.

But it's not without hope - there's another hole in a ceiling and this time, Claude has a wall to use for hand and footholds up to it. The climb's quick and leads to the roof rather than another floor and Claude moves across it, eyes on the shingles beneath his feet to approximate retracing his steps to where Steve's working. The path leads him to a ruined ceiling and he crouches down to peer through it. If his guess is as lucky as he wants it to be, maybe it's the same room as before. But he'll settle for it being close enough to there, too. ]

[ A choice. It'd be simple if it was just that. Wouldn't it? It's crossed his mind before since hearing what Sylvain told him, then what Petra told him. The latter of which is more concerning as it'd rewrite history, at least to Claude. But he also believes Petra, hence the complication. ]

Maybe. I suppose there's a chance it relies on choice for one of them, but the other? [ Where to even start. Claude has to think about that, strip away details that matter to him but require all kinds of added explanation. ] In what I lived of Fodlan's war, we marched on the Empire's capital and they never approached ours in the Alliance. But for one of my friends, it was the Empire who marched on our capital. Whatever happened there in Derdriu, they had the upper hand and I surrendered.

Which, in all honesty, sounds like something I'd do. Dying for an ideal's never been one of my dreams, not for me or for anyone else.

[ There's a good chance he's too nonchalant for that last part though it is the truth. Sounding lighthearted's how he approaches most things so this will get included into it to keep it on more of an even keel in his mind. What Petra described at Derdriu (and what Sylvain's lived so far) isn't the only difference, but he's not even sure he wants to get into how Teach does or doesn't factor into all of this. Not yet. ]

Maybe none of that matters now considering we're all here and can't change whatever happened for each of us. Especially if we... aren't the only ones this has happened to.

Dying is in few people's dreams.

[ The remark is dry. He starts back towards his horse, only a few paces away. Begins taking off her saddle. He's not keen on riding back in it heat, and here's a good place as any to wait for dusk. The sun's already low in the sky.

The multiverse is what a handful here call it. He's not unfamiliar with the term—the kind of writings scholars with too much time on their hands explore—but Claude's explanation sounds...an extreme version of the concept. Not small choices made or different realms existing. Rather, a shift in a world where the people, the places, remain the same but the events do not. ]

Ciri and I are a few years apart. But our memories align. She just knows more.

[ She was a child, in other words, when he last saw her. Young and headstrong. Now she's grown and equally headstrong so not too much has changed. He feels it now and then, that gulf between them. There are things she will not say to him that he knows she's keeping. He's just not asked. Doesn't seem the right time. ]

Maybe not dying in general, but when it comes to dying for an ideal you might be surprised at how popular that can be in Fodlan. Both as its own ideal and in reality.

[ Well. Another thing likely to not matter here, given the Fodlan contingent's collective feelings on this war back when it'd only been brewing. One more thing he should probably add to the list of things to discuss, really.

When Geralt steps back to his horse it gets a slight smile from Claude, if only because it's reminiscent of what he would've done with his own wyvern. Claude's attention turns to a different plant nearby but this one he recognizes thanks to Nadine's guidance, and he goes back to kneeling to collect what he can of the shell-leaves. Those will be earmarked for the clinic's supplies before anything for his own use, and as Geralt speaks again Claude glances up. ]

I'm only a year or so ahead of them in my case. But a few years between both of you, even if you share the same memories. [ A pause to focus on cutting a tough stem without injuring the leaves and while he does the math on what the other man's said. ] Doesn't sound any easier, not that any of this is. It also sounds like you and Ciri have known each other for a while.

[ Perhaps there are those like that here. He wonders. How many will die for a war that isn't theirs? What makes it theirs? Geralt hasn't any attachment to the land, the politics, but the people are another matter.

And they cannot exactly go home. ]

Long enough. [ Longer for Ciri. He doesn't get into the surge of memories that struck them, how he didn't remember her and then he did. Then they all did. But even with those memories, only months had passed. For Ciri, she's known him years.

Still seems to like having him around, though. So he must've done something right in those years. ] I took her in when she was a girl.

[ He's brushing Roach as he speaks, cleaning off the dust and ash and dirt. The air's not gotten much better since Libertas went up in flames, but the smoke's finally cleared out of the sky a little. More than ever, he misses the sharp clear air of the winter mountains. ]

[ Long enough doesn't tell him much by itself, an island of a sentence, but it does with the added context after. Ciri had mentioned training from a young age, and he has to wonder how that fits into this. Something else which could hold no weight in Abraxas, perhaps doesn't make much of a difference besides establishing relationships to those who are curious. (Like Claude.) ]

Are you someone who trained her? She'd said something about training and stubbornness, two things I can relate to well myself. That was back when we were using bows and arrows, though, and before I saw her in action with a sword. Much different.

[ An easier topic than war and what it might bring to them or what it's wrought upon their homes, given he still has questions wisely tucked away from their last conversation. For now, the leaves he's collected get secured in their own pouch. Claude retrieves a list tucked away in yet another satchel pocket to peruse through what he'd scribbled on with today's botany goals. It occurs to him during his reading his words possibly sounded ambiguous at best, and he taps a finger idly against the paper in his hand. ]

That was meant as a compliment if so, considering I thought her bow skills were quite good. But seeing her with a sword in hand was... something else entirely. Probably what my combat instructor hoped I'd be able to do back when he taught me, but swords never were my strongest suit.

I will be taking that as a compliment.

[She beams for just a moment as they continue on together; fond as she is of Lindhardt, she thinks she is probably the better choice when it comes to easy company. Their resident crest scholar is quite shrewd, and though he can be very pleasant sometimes, it can take a bit of patience that not everyone has.]

If we do end up finding more friends, and they end up in other cities... this would be good neutral territory to meet in, yes?

[Getting them there would be tricky, though.]

They might not find it without being shown, though... if someone were to be arriving in another city, we might not even be knowing about it for ages. It was luck that you were finding us when you did, Claude.

Maybe.

[ That's a placeholder of a reaction because Claude needs to buy himself a little bit more time to formulate an answer. It's not an easy one to find as he glances at the classrooms once more. Or rather, the one he wants to say perhaps isn't the realistic one in the end.

Still, there's only so long he can stay silent before they'll both give him strange looks for that being out of character, so with a sigh only to himself Claude shrugs and smiles. ]

It was a long few months of looking around here in hopes I'd find anyone I knew, even if I didn't want to find anyone. Not that I don't like you guys, but - you know what I mean. If whoever it is doesn't also end up in the Free Cities, I don't envy them that same searching experience.

[ There are, in fact, several people he would not like to find in Abraxas. He's not about to say that since that'd be tipping his hand far too much, wouldn't it? The smile stays in place. ]

I suppose we'll find out if luck is on our side soon enough. Rumors about more arrivals made their way into Cadens which is how I knew to look for you. I'd assume we'll hear the same again when the time comes, so that's one way we can check.

[ Geralt doesn't answer at first. He runs the brush over Roach, letting Claude finish speaking. Half the time, he isn't sure if Claude is talking to him or if the man is musing all of the thoughts in between out loud.

He weighs what he wants to say in the meantime. Eventually settles on: ] I raised her.

[ He did more than train her. She is more than his student. It's not a thought he stumbles over anymore. His memories from home are firm in his mind; he's no longer missing those pieces that left him wondering just how they came together—not the grand scope of it, but the quiet little moments. The bits on her plate she'd always pick around at dinner, the treats she'd sneak his horse, that face she'd make at him when he sent her to bed.

And she should impress with her skill. He never taught her anything less. ]

I imagine one day, she'll best me. [ He's not serious, but it isn't wholly a joke. He's only getting older by the season. ]

Edited 2022-10-11 07:06 (UTC)

[ Sylvain glances over at Claude when that silence drags out from the other man, sensing he was holding something back without being able to put his finger on what. Which was odd. Claude didn't usually give things like that away, huh. Or maybe he was just getting more perceptive about picking up on it? He'd have to think about it later.

For the moment, he gets distracted by the answer that does come. It's a grim thought, one of their companions trapped in one of the other cities, separate from them. Potentially on the other side of the war, especially if they ended up in THorne. not something Sylvain ever wants to deal with again, that's for sure.

But for now, he sidesteps and slings an arm around Claude's shoulders in friendly camaraderie, a playful smirk teasing about the corners of his lips. ]

Don't worry, we're here now, you don't have to worry about being lonely anymore. And we'll help you keep an eye out for anyone else, too.

[ Somehow, even with the mention of years and his own fishing for whether that training looped in there among it, Claude isn't expecting Geralt to say he raised Ciri. During the silence he'd kept reviewing his notes, thought of something here and there to add to them once back at the inn, content to wait for whatever the other man opts to share.

So what finally comes out of his mouth after his own lack of immediate response is, ] Huh.

[ There's a lot to unpack there. Or, more accurately, it promptly drags a lot of things out of some corner of Claude's mind he'd been doing this best to not think about. A joke about children upstaging their parents gets discarded because now his thoughts are on Petra and Sylvain again even if said thoughts hadn't wandered far. What it means that they're here, why he knows what he does, why seeing them is far more complicated than he's been pretending that it's not. How he might feel if any of the Deer show up someday when that possibility comes with both relief and trepidation attached. Is it the same for Geralt? ]

Does it make it easier or harder that she's here too?

[ He asks this before he's fully aware he's going to, but there it is. For once he's not interested in the fine details of something. Any answer will do even if the answers he can think of to apply to himself are no less tangled, no easier to sift through. There's a chance that - aside from the general lack of words - Claude's telling on himself here by keeping his eyes his list even if it's also clear he's not really looking at it, not with his tone also decisively not light or teasing but tinged with something heavier. ]

[ That's a far more subdued response than usual. Geralt pauses a moment before resuming his work on his horse. There's obviously something on the man's mind. It's just a matter of how much he wants to pry. ]

It's not that simple. [ Both. Neither. Nothing about Ciri is easy, but it isn't right to say it's difficult, either. In a sense, he doesn't think of it in those terms. Whatever complications she does or does not bring into his life, she will always be worth it. ]

She's here. I wouldn't give her up for anything.

[ And she's the entire reason he's even attached to this world in the first place. If not for her, he'd be the first fighting through that doorway to return home. To find her. ]

Are you asking because of your new friends?

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[ OPEN ] hide your love, don't be shy

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