"No, you aren't." Viktor turns slightly, as if suddenly realizing that Jayce is much more self-assured than he was even a few short months ago. He can't ply him with carefully-placed words or guilt him by appealing to his softer side. If it wasn't so frustrating, he might be proud--and maybe he is, because he sounds steely, but not disappointed.
He's known, on some level, that it was always going to come to this. Being together has never been without sacrifice, or the underlying knowledge that taking this for himself means giving up on something else. Viktor just has to decide if letting go of his promise to the Undercity is worth what they have. He's not sure. Not yet. He's only had his new lease on life for mere weeks. He needs time.
It would be easy to lay back down on the mattress and put his back to Jayce and sulk. To punish Jayce emotionally for being able to target him so well and see right through his attempted altruism into the selfish desires that prop it up. The prospect is more than a little tempting, but just as Jayce is a better person because of him, Viktor is changed, too. He can't close himself off and disregard this so easily, not anymore. So, after a moment, he uncurls himself, gingerly moving closer to Jayce, sliding an arm around his waist, pressing up against his back.
"I do." Seeing Jayce like this never fails to strike something within him, an overwhelming desire to take back the harsh words and offer comfort, even if his own anger still churns in the pit of his stomach. "You are. What I want. Do you think my goal is to return to a place where you're with someone else? Where you're dead? No. I just thought, that, if there was a way to change it...for us to have everything...I would want to try."
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He's known, on some level, that it was always going to come to this. Being together has never been without sacrifice, or the underlying knowledge that taking this for himself means giving up on something else. Viktor just has to decide if letting go of his promise to the Undercity is worth what they have. He's not sure. Not yet. He's only had his new lease on life for mere weeks. He needs time.
It would be easy to lay back down on the mattress and put his back to Jayce and sulk. To punish Jayce emotionally for being able to target him so well and see right through his attempted altruism into the selfish desires that prop it up. The prospect is more than a little tempting, but just as Jayce is a better person because of him, Viktor is changed, too. He can't close himself off and disregard this so easily, not anymore. So, after a moment, he uncurls himself, gingerly moving closer to Jayce, sliding an arm around his waist, pressing up against his back.
"I do." Seeing Jayce like this never fails to strike something within him, an overwhelming desire to take back the harsh words and offer comfort, even if his own anger still churns in the pit of his stomach. "You are. What I want. Do you think my goal is to return to a place where you're with someone else? Where you're dead? No. I just thought, that, if there was a way to change it...for us to have everything...I would want to try."