The elves created secret passages everywhere

[magicalarchaeologist]

WHO: Istredd and anyone!
WHAT: Catch-all for September
WHERE: Thorne, Horizon, Nocwich
WHEN: Nebulous all over September stuff.
WARNINGS: Spoilers for The Witcher season 3! PTSD from details within the season.





Starters Below!

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Comments

[mobezon]

"I'm acquainted with Michael. I also know what's someone else's business is theirs." He likes Michael, and if anything he's more on the fence of meeting any of the Winchesters from what he heard. He does judge, but not for this, especially after their last conversation. Lestat was arguably considered a point of view for evil if seen from the outside, and Claudia had her serial killer means. He didn't agree with them over their killing, but he still loved them. Istredd's ask is only a mirror, transporting him back to the frustrations of why he does not open up. Istredd has the courage to ask what Louis couldn't, which in itself is admirable. There's assurance in his tone.

"I'm not religious anymore. I think everyone, even 'the devil', deserves a second chance. I ain't no saint myself." He wants to make sure Istredd knows his peace on it, at least the extent he can admit. And yes, even if Lucifer would be an asshole to him he'll keep an open mind for the day he were to ever meet him. It's the next part that keeps him quiet out of respect when he picks up on the vulnerability over these memories. It's a silent honoring, what he's done with Claudia's shrine when he visits. To people gone, to a home destroyed, to the loss of it all. He finds he truly feels for Istredd and his loss. Louis would be angry, but he keeps it to himself. Instead, it's melancholy that wins out.

"You're here. I hope you find solace in the home you've made for yourself. It'll hurt for a long time. If I know something from the time we've known one another, it's that you're strong-willed, Istredd."

[magicalarchaeologist]

"Michael and I get along decently. They're all tortured in their own way, their God was harsher on the angels than anyone else." It's very strange if you think about it. His first creations, designed to worship him and never ask questions, and they're the ones he focuses on hurting. Istredd can't make heads or tails of what their 'Father' was thinking or his motivations, but they don't know either. He's much more spiteful toward that God than anything else.

He reaches out to take Louis' hand, comfortable in their connection to do that. "I think everyone who adapts to this place eventually starts to see it as a second chance." Probably because they have to do that. Otherwise they'll be stuck in this place forever with no sense of purpose.

"I am happy here, it's not very easy when you love and hate the same people. You understand." Since Louis and he have already discussed the mixed feelings toward Lestat, and possibly even Claudia. "The way they raised us was monstrous and they weren't good people, but they were the only family I knew. And my mentor wasn't my father, but I still hoped he could change, and he's dead now."

Istredd did 'betray' Stregobor right before coming here, reporting him to the others, when he thought he was the villain. He wanted him to see justice, but not for him to die. Now they will never have closure, eternally. It's the mixed feelings that are staying with him. The Brotherhood was never something he thought could end. It was supposed to permanently exist as a headache that he would eventually have to take over like the rest of his class.

"I'll be okay, I just haven't mourned."

[mobezon]

It may be different, but he somehow thinks it all ends up the same, if it is to believe that the spirit, the mind, and soul all were to belong to a singular god, and that same god could easily sacrifice their child. There's a pang to that, to think that he may have done the same on the surface. He is no god, nor does he ever wish to reach such heights. He tried to stop it, but what is done is done and he carries the wound of it for all eternity. It started with Paris. He's learning to live with it. It's a part that he hopes to be able to talk about with Istredd one day. He knows deeply what Istredd speaks about as if it were from his own, since he's still finding ways to mourn. The shrine he refurbished still stands for Claudia and grows strong under his care.

He opens his hand up when Istredd grabs it, securing the hold with the grasp of his fingers over the back of his hand. It’s becoming easier, to allow thinking in which he isn’t alone. Is it enough, he thinks. There’s a tremble in his voice that becomes fortified.

"Mourn." It's such a simple statement to make, one that he thinks Istredd has probably heard or knows well enough. He does not need Louis to tell him. There's relief in saying it out loud, one that he wasn't given the opportunity to do properly.

“People we love often can hurt us the most. And we them. Don't matter what relationship it is. It mattered to you. Circumstances makes us do what we have to do. I’d like you to read Claudia’s diary when you feel up to it. It’s back where I left my reading nook. It's safe there. My most valuable possession." He knows it's not the original one, that the Horizon is only granting him another gift from his will. A shorten breath before he speaks up again. Istredd's vulnerability is opening his up, "You have my permission. I’ve found it’s best to mourn with others. I'm here, for whenever you need to take a bookmark to life.”

[magicalarchaeologist]

I don't know, he thinks back. But I hope so. What else can he do? This is the only answer he can reach for. Istredd may be older than he looks but compared to the rest, his class is considered young. He has hundreds of years ahead of him still, at least.

"Of course, if you give me permission." Istredd would never enter anyone's mind or their private space without permission. That is something he takes very seriously, and what he reassures other people of when they get nervous being around a telepath.

"Stregobor was a terrible person. Truly. Racist against elves, cruel, apathetic, manipulative. He taught me how to spy and break others, he wanted me to be his heir." So there is a paternal edge to their relationship, in the worst way. "As a young introverted boy, it meant a lot, for our rector to single me out." Istredd's always been the outsider. Even as a child he felt like an outsider. He didn't excel at the things the other students were focused on, he was too internal. But he did excel at what Stregobor considered the most important, so he was chosen.

"It took me longer than I'd like to break away from him, but I never was able to really fully do it. Even with this memory update, when I turned him in for what I thought were his crimes, I wanted to believe he'd finally listen." Istredd laughs, humorlessly, shaking his head. Because it's naive, it's still so naive. This was just jammed into his memory and he's making the same mistakes. "And now he's dead. Which means all the stupid childish things I hoped for with him are dead too."

Any hopes at a better man, at a mentor he could be proud of, of even some tiny bit of change. Or of believing that despite everything, Stregobor did care for something. For him. His emotions make his voice shaky. "They're all gone, and I used to think if the old guard would just die or leave, we'd be able to rebuild, but now it's real."