• OPEN •

[carmesi]

Who: wanda maximoff + others
When: november
Where: solvunn, horizon, nocwich
What: catch-all for the month! including general top-levels for solvunn. horizon threads based on request! additionally, she'll be in nocwich gathering some supplies.
Warnings: tba!

Comments

[theidlemaiden]

[ Wanda's voice hadn't been unkind but it makes her shrink all the same in shame.

For what isn't the first time she wonders when she became so gloomy about where her path would take her when she hadn't given it much thought before. Things always just worked out for her without little effort on her part. Maybe a part of her hoped that this would sort itself out too. ]

No. [ The beginnings of a lump forms in her throat out. Hilda's selfish wants crawl at her throat straining at the leash she had put them on. Shame begins to creep at the back of her neck. ] He's letting me decide what I want. I've just asked for time to figure out how I feel about it all.

[ Her eyes skip up towards Wanda, lips lifting humourlessly. ]

I can't say that I've made much progress.

[carmesi]

[that's hardly much help, if wanda has to be honest. still, she isn't an expert about matters of the heart because she herself can be rather envious and selfish about it, and she's never—well—been in the situation that hilda has been in. always quite monogamous, her relationships, and never with a threat of someone else being in the picture.

not quite in this way.

it's not quite like her, but hilda has earned her trust; has earned seeing wanda like this, and this friendship is so unlike any of the ones the avengers had bestowed her with. she moves to lie down with hilda, slightly atop the shorter woman, wrapping her up in an embrace.]

You're allowed to want anything you desire. I'm sorry that you feel that you're the one getting in the way.

[it cannot be easy.]

You're not.

[theidlemaiden]

[ When Wanda's warmth wraps itself around her, Hilda curls into her instinctively. It continues to chip away at the front she's been putting up that she's been fine about this whole time. That, despite having made up with her best friend, discovering that feelings were returned, still didn't help heal the hurt that had sunk deep into her bones over the last several months.

Wanda's words and comfort aren't some magic spell that will change her greedy, conflicted heart. But they do help soothe it some. Reassure her that in some way her greed is okay even if it goes against everything she's tried to form herself into. Her arms go to wrap around her friend to draw closer, Wanda's faint floral scent enveloping her. ]

I feel like I am. [ And then quietly, almost ashamed - ] I think I like Sylvain too. But he's... [ Dead in their timeline. ] He and Claude can't ever be together in our timeline. Shouldn't it make more sense for them to be together here?

[carmesi]

Would it not make sense for you to also be together with either or both here, then, by that logic?

[the future, the world— it is full of uncertainties, and just because someone doesn't have a future outside of here doesn't mean that it gives them a pass or to have priority over something as complex and delicate as a relationship.

she reflects upon her own circumstances.]

Matt and I have decided to be together not because of the uncertainty of what will happen in our world, or if we should ever meet. We want to be together because of the promise of a future together.

[and that's, irrevocably, also perfectly fine as far as relationships go.

wanda rubs at hilda's back, gentle to not tangle her long, pink hair.]

Matters of the heart don't generally make sense, you know.

[theidlemaiden]

[ What Wanda says is right. Truthfully it's been something that she's asked herself too. Why not just be with them both? Why not just see what could happen? Hilda lapses into a contemplative silence but the answer to Wanda's question comes almost instantly.

Because it was easier said than done.

Maybe if she had remained blissfully ignorant and ignored the rift she felt between her and Claude she would have had an easier time slipping into this scenario she found herself in. Maybe if she hadn't been sucked into an undercurrent of gloom and insecurity, she would have had an easier time adjusting. Instead Abraxas had undone her and pulled the soft gossamer that she had worn for so long to reveal the jealousy and greed beneath it.

She burrows herself deeper into Wanda's embrace with a watery laugh. ]

I wish they were easier. Then I wouldn't have felt like this for months. [ The next words spill from her lips despite herself. ] I just don't think I'm the best fit for either of them. They're both better together than with me. I haven't done anything but hurt them.