❂ open!

[thoughts]

Who: river & you!!
When: over the first week of december!
Where: nocwich and castle thorne
What: exploring nocwich for that good cross-faction CR and then a week later when river's canon powers return with a suckerpunch
Warnings: possible mentions of human experimentation, torture, and child abuse. there are content warnings for canon themes and an opt-in/opt-out post for her psychic abilities over here, please check it out!

☾ backdated - nocwich

[ being new to abraxas - alarmed and terrified at being stolen away, having spent the first day traversing castle thorne in a daze as she tried to accept the reality of this world - there is no small amount of trepidation as she steps through the portal to nocwich. as far as the theoretical physics of it all, a portal is more outlandish than teleportation, which makes more sense from a logistical standpoint. although she's not a fan of the molecular deconstruction of her body just to be reassembled elsewhere, so maybe a magic portal won't be so bad...

anyone by the castle thorne portal might hear her mumbling about this for a long while before she finally takes a deep breath and steps through.

more than the notion of magic being real how is magic real, river's main curiosity is the fact of being allowed to go to nocwich at all. she isn't used to her captors being willing to let them leave, even if it's on a tight leash. nowhere close to freedom, but it falls to the back of her mind the moment she finds herself in the bright and lively nature of oleuni square.

with no money to spend and no inclination to buy anything in the first place, river spends her time just wandering around looking at everything with eyes the size of saucers. with a staunch lack of propriety, she'll pick up anything she's curious about and may or may not put it back where it belongs. she watches the performances on stage with rapt attention, stares a little too long at any non-human folks walking about, and otherwise seems to float about in a happy daze as she wanders alone through the streets.

might be best she's not left unattended for too long, lest she overstay her welcome and disturb the locals. ]

☉ current date - castle thorne

[ despite her early misgivings and intense mistrust of those what brought them to this world against their will, there is so much about the castle that excites the childlike wonder that encompasses river in her entirety. it's stunningly beautiful, and she spends a lot of time aimlessly wandering around ( generally barefoot ) as she takes in the architecture, hangs out in the gardens, and puts her fingers all over anything that even remotely looks magical.

more often than not, it looks like she's having fun. she might get shy or suspicious when people approach her, especially any of the thornean mages, but she does well enough to explore with a brightness to her features.

in many ways, it's a blessing of her eyes being closed, her mind shut to the influx of noise and chaos that ordinarily floods her senses. river knew better than to hope the silence might stay forever, but it still catches her by surprise when the moment comes during breakfast on her eighth day. like a tidal wave crashing over her, the thoughts and emotions and worries and fears and secrets and everythingeverything around her overloads her senses.

anyone in the dining hall might hear a loud scream and the clatter of dishes as river flings herself out and away from the table. she winds up on the floor, eyes wide and shaking like a leaf in the wind, ready to be blown away by the slightest breeze. she rambles in distress, seemingly without seeing anyone in front of her even as she sees everything. ]

No, no no no. No! You can't - you can't be here, you can't! Qǐng shàngdì liánmǐn - stay away!

[ tears in her eyes and screams in her ears, river may be hard to console as she tries and fails to fight back the rising tide of panic. let's just hope nothing sharp or pointy finds its way into her shaking hands... ]

[ ooc: as a reminder, hover over any chinese text for a translate, and please hop on over to her opt-in/opt-out post to let me know how you'd like me to play her psychic abilities around your character. feel free to reach out to me at ragemarshmallow on discord or varooooom if you want to plot anything out! 💚 ]

Comments

[thoughts]

[ river blinks curiously at claire for her question about earth. she's been told that this world of abraxas is a nexus of other worlds colliding, a hub of the multiverse if it's to be believed. makes sense that there might be folks from earth around here too. ]

Year 2101, the last generation ship leaves Earth for 34Tauri(2020) in search of new planets to colonize. She was left behind due to the depletion of natural resources, overpopulation, and increased global crises. It's been a little over four hundred years since. Was.

[ it's all said as simple fact, almost as though recited from a textbook. but she imagines what it must be like for someone's home to go from is to was, so she adds in the same gentle deadpan: ]

Wǒ xiàng nǐ hé nǐ de jiārén biǎoshì āidào. They say it was very beautiful, once.

[beautifullies]

[ Is this what it was like for Jamie? To know that someone is so far in you're future they're saying things you can't comprehend? That life as you know it will be eradicated one day? For a moment, she has an overwhelming since of homesickness and for the first time it isn't for family, but for the planet itself. ]

It is beautiful still, for me. I've seen almost all of it, except the Poles, the Arctic. I can't imagine it any other way.

[ In the 20th century before she left, they'd just barely made it to the moon, and this is a little sobering to hear. It's so far in the future, she doesn't know how to wrap her mind around a depleted planet. ]

Many people here have experienced space travel, or it's normal for them, and here I am, still unsure if NASA ever made it past the moon before the end of the 20th century.

[ The foreign language River speaks reminds Claire of Yi Tien Cho. Honorable Wife, he called her, and attempted to teach her as much Mandarin as possible. ]

Did your find new planets? There must be more than just one that's habitable.

[ This isn't the conversation Claire expected to be having, but it's something she's genuinely come to enjoy about her forced time on Abraxas: she's learned more about things she'll never see in her lifetime, and for better or worse, she's come to appreciate the journey of meeting someone new. ]

[thoughts]

[ her interest piques when claire says she's seen most of earth, perking up in her seat a bit. of course, there are very old photos and modern 3D imaging technology has made it easy to produce countless replications of earth-that-was, but textbooks can lie and nothing compares to seeing it with your own eyes.

maybe river is from a far off future where space travel is just the way of the world, but she looks at claire like she's the one holding some kind of fantastic knowledge she could never hope to attain. the sheer impossibility of both past and future colliding in this weird world of abraxas continues to leave her in a constant state of awe. ]

NASA made a valiant effort. Discovered Alpha Centauri in 2020 through infrared telescopes, but didn't manage to get a man past the Moon for another decade.

[ and then a few decades after that, they launched most of humankind much, much further. ]

There are seventy-five planets in the 'Verse as it is, and there's a hundred fifty more moons to boot. Lots of places that are habitable, some more so than others. We tried to make them as close to Earth-That-Was as possible, but not all of them appreciated the terraforming.

[ still said as though reciting information from a book, with a bit of the twang that becomes more customary beyond the core, but she has a quiet note of disdain when she mentions terraforming. their efforts to create nature are unnatural in and of itself; she thinks of everything that was lost when mankind decided to declare all of space as their property. ]

[beautifullies]

[ River is very obviously a clever young woman, there is no doubting that. Claire does wonder at the way she seems to perfectly rattle off elaborate facts, seems to know so much right off the top of her head. It reminds her of the Doctor as far as the depth of her knowledge, though he rattled off facts to her like he breathed air and wasn't all as serious. ]

2020...[ Claire does the math in her head and lets out a breath of air. ] My daughter will be seventy-one. [ If she's even in the 21st century. That makes a small laugh bubble out of her, a silent thought that borders on hysterical because what is her life? ] Sorry, that's just so...incredibly difficult to imagine as a mother.

[ She just brought Bree home from the hospital, didn't she? In any case, as River explains, there's a little confusion about terraforming, making an assumption. ]

It wouldn't be a stretch to wonder if those seeking to find new homes displaced others, would it? It isn't as if whole countries hadn't set a precedent for booting out Indigenous people.

[ Her own disdain comes through, imagining a very specific scenario of forced displacement and razing the land. ]

And please, feel free to ask about Earth as I know it, I don't mean to only ask you questions.

[ She sees that spark of curiosity and understands it, coming from the opposite perspective. And perhaps, with a bit more talking, she'll understand a little more about this woman. ]

[thoughts]

[ river giggles just a little at claire's mention of her daughter, imagining the lamentations of a mother for their child's future. she tries not to think of her own mother - how easily her parents abandoned her to the academy's devices, how quickly they disavowed simon for daring to look for her, those no good tam children that are now lost to the stars - and instead, she just hopes that claire's daughter will enjoy the hubble telescope when it's their turn to meet the universe. ]

In four hundred years of space-farin', we never did find signs of extraterrestrial lifeforms. [ she sounds a bit put out by this fact ] Easier to colonize empty stars, so it's probably for the best. We're a greedy species.

[ they don't quite teach the history of earth the way claire might know of it - too inflammatory, river supposes, which makes her appreciate claire's frankness about it. she wants to know so much that an open invitation to ask questions might be a bit dangerous. river ponders it for a moment before blinking at claire and starting with a simple: ]

What do you miss the most?

[ yes, a very simple, easy to answer low stakes questions... ]

[beautifullies]

[ If Claire knew what River's life had been, River would find herself with someone instantly willing to be a mother-figure, if she wanted such a thing. Many things get to Claire, but none more than those who were treated cruelly, especially young. ]

At least humanity had to build their own settlements this time. But four hundred years is a long time to never come across another planet of sentient beings, especially considering...well.

[ Claire looks around; the fact that they're all on Abraxas and not from the same places means everyone's home is out there, somewhere in the infinite expanse of space. ]

No beings have ever found Earth from my point of view, but perhaps something out there is searching as well, thinking the same things we are.

[ River's question is simple but broad, and so many answers tumble through Claire's mind at once that she has to shake her head just a little to clear it. ]

From traveling, I miss seeing how varied the planet could be. Snow and mountains one moment and then, a hundred miles in one direction there's a desert. Sunset on the coast and being able to see the sunrise on the horizon. Or hiking until you think there's no point and you're going nowhere, only to break through a clearing to the most beautiful landscape you've ever seen. Those are things I haven't experienced since I was probably around your age.

[ Exhaling, she tries to come up with a better answer than something so broad. ]

Right now, in this moment, it's people I miss. My husband, our children.

[ Bree of course, but Fergus too, and by extension, Marsali, which means grandchildren to miss. Can she miss something she hasn't experienced yet? ]

[thoughts]

[ it's a salient point and river looks around when claire does. the notion of werewolves and vampires hasn't quite sunk in yet, but it's undeniable in the features of folks that walk past, along with the colorful variations of summoned she's encountered. it's hard to believe - but she's always thought the same, or at least hoped for it, because the idea that humankind are the only sentient creatures in the entire 'verse just seems so incredibly lonely.

she turns her attention back to claire for her answer though, her eyes gleaming a bit at the vivid descriptions. she wishes she could see it for herself; the tams weren't exactly the hiking sort. ]

Lots of nature on most planets too, but they were all modeled after Earth. The Liàngmèng likes to say we improved upon it. A copycat can't compare their art to the original and say it's better.

[ again, that note of flippancy for terraforming, and perhaps a bit of wistfulness that she won't ever get to experience earth-that-was for herself. family, though - maybe that's another unattainable thing she may never see in her lifetime. ]

Do you wish they were here? Or are they safe, back home?

[beautifullies]

[ This question has come up more and more often for Claire, and each time, she feels like her answer changes a little. She used to be ardently against it, now she isn't so sure. There's plenty of hesitation for River to infer this is a delicate question, but there's consideration being given for an answer, not a careful avoidance. ]

I honestly don't know. There are things at home that are just as, if not more dangerous than some things that have happened here. There's the American Revolution to look forward to, so when I leave here, am I going to a less dangerous place? My husband will be forced to fight, our family will be uprooted and scattered for who knows how long.

[ It makes her nauseous to think about, that she could still be a widow, that her daughter could be attacked, that so much could happen while she and Jamie tried their damndest to be on the right side of history. ]

I think for as long as I'm here without them, a part of me will always want to go back. But if they were here, we'd have to have a long conversation about this being our permanent home, even if we could go back.

[ It might be too soon for River to be able to tell, but Claire wonders the same. ]

Is home dangerous enough that you wouldn't mind everyone you care for being here?