EVENT #18: EMERGENCE - IC EVENT LOG

[abraxasmods]

Event #18 - Emergence

OOC Plotting Post ⦁ Pre-Event Info ⦁ Setting Descriptions

Whether voluntary or by force, you find yourself transported to the Singularity's crater. There probably aren't many resistors - officials have taken great pains to convince you to come voluntarily, reserving force as a last resort - but it's clear that everyone is required for this to work. It takes multiple mages to stabilize the portal, but you make it there in one piece. If you cooperate, you'll be asked to walk towards the ancient relic. If you resisted, you might be forced to do so while restrained. Regardless, a heavy fog soon descends around the area, obscuring you and your vision.

If you have thoughts of turning back, it's too late: for some of you, the second you step across the threshold, a force pulls at your chest and absorbs your psyche at once. For others, a mystical call beckons you to walk a little further before the same effect takes hold. And for a rare few, the call brings you to the Singularity itself, where you're compelled to touch it - and are subsequently swallowed up like the others.

The Horizon doesn't greet you like you might expect. Instead, something far stranger awaits.

Please communicate with your fellow players as needed! We also recommend discussing with us if you plan on a major environmental upheaval. As a rule of thumb, you should avoid changes to the landscape that will significantly alter the established map.

We've also posted comment sections for WORLDBUILDING and HANDWAVED submissions. Instructions can be found at the respective links.

Year 20,879

When you open your eyes, it feels like you've only blinked. If your body has transformed or you're someplace that shouldn't exist, it doesn't strike you as odd. You were always here. Everything around you was always here, and your physical alterations and new abilities - while perhaps not originally there - have been a part of you for a long, long time.

The world of Abraxas isn't completely foreign. Familiar territories remain, as well as the familiar faces of those with long lifespans. But a lot has changed in 800 years, too, especially where the Gods are concerned. Alongside the Old Gods of the Ancient Pantheon and the Cardinal Gods of the New Order, a third class of deities formed from you and your fellow Summoned: the Ecesis Gods of the Iterum Pantheon.

Politics, People, & Gods

Abraxas's political landscape remains complex, with continued tensions over land, worship, resources, and power. Nonetheless, since the Free Cities is no longer intent on destroying the Singularity, conflict over the ancient relic has lessened. All territories agree that the Godlands - and the Singularity - belong to the Gods themselves.

Beliefs and Gods

The active presence of the Summoned confirms the existence of the Gods. As a result, most Abraxans turn to the Summoned and other Gods for aid or protection. Extreme reverence exists in certain areas, especially on the Isle of the Lost and in parts of Solvunn. In other places, though, the Gods are merely acknowledged as a facet of life - a force that helps or hinders depending on temperament and should be respected, much like the sea. The Gods play a crucial role, sure, but so do the rain and stars. This is particularly true in the Feywilds, the Nether, and the Free Cities.

Small pockets of non-believers actively denounce the Gods. They claim the Summoned should be wiped from the world and the Singularity destroyed to prevent future invasions. Labeled dangerous heretics by Thorne and Solvunn, and "regressives" by the Free Cities - whose scientists and philosophers liken such thinking to be as foolish as declaring the sun unworthy or the earth to be flat - these people are shunned from society. In Solvunn, the consequences are more severe: heretics are exiled to the Barren, where they are subsumed by the desert, the Maw, or whichever Gods may punish them.

At the other end, some sects revere the Godlands so much that they believe feeding themselves to the relic will enhance Abraxas' good fortune for generations to come. Such cults are quite rare, but there are reports of mortals throwing themselves into the Singularity's crater and disintegrating as a gesture of their devotion to the divine.

International Relations

Due to the combined change in their priorities, Thorne and the Free Cities are less at odds. The Free Cities believes in protecting the Singularity; Thorne no longer seeks to control it. Nonetheless, mistrust flares on occasion.

While things are peaceful during these three months and have been for a few decades, Abraxas hasn't found a cure for war in the Gods. Conflict has broken out in the past and will again. Eyes are on the Nether as it grows in power, and who knows how long Thorne will be content with its losses? Will they convince the Velan Republic to reunite and turn against the Free Cities? For now, though, the territories have found their stride and appear more interested in progress than fighting.

Magic & The Singularity

Magic is relatively unchanged and is a vital part of Abraxan life. The small kingdom of Thorne continues to practice Academic Magic. Meanwhile, Wild Magic plays the same important role in the Velan Republic (formally Nott). Meanwhile, the Free Cities has developed New Magic further. The goal of decoupling magic from technology is less of a focus. Instead, researchers are eager to find new ways to fuse magic and innovation, including aspects of the Gods. Portable shrines, for example, are popular with traveling merchants.

High Magic no longer exists as a specific school of magic now that offerings, pacts, and requests to the Gods are a part of everyday life across Abraxas. Solvunn has returned to its roots, using the ancient Academic Magic practiced by the Lunae for standard tasks while turning to the Gods for greater blessings.

The Singularity has been relatively stable for the past two or three centuries. While occasional disturbances rumble, for the most part, the presence of the Summoned has strengthened it, alleviating its displeasure and ensuring that Abraxas - and possibly the universe itself - continues to exist. Indeed, academic writings from Thorne and the Free Cities across time suggest that the Singularity's devouring of the world has considerably slowed. It is now as much of a threat as the eventual collapse of the sun, something that is bound to occur but not for eons.

Of course, this could quickly change if the Summoned or any other Gods provoke the Singularity by rejecting its connection or denying its magic...so all should take care not to upset the nature of things.

Old World, New World

The map of Abraxas has undergone some notable shifts, although many names and places are the same.

Setting descriptions are HERE for your reference.

Mechapolis, the Witchwood, and the Barren/the Maw contain prompts related to the event itself. Information about those areas can be found under "Exploring the Land" in the section The World as the Divine (Month 1-2).

Month 1-2: Submersion

What do you last remember? Well, that depends. You might recall most things perfectly clearly. You might have new memories that don't feel new at all. Or, you might only remember the most recent year or two. Regardless, there is something missing: an important face, a handful of key events...maybe you don't remember having ever lived anywhere except Abraxas. You might find this unsettling, or you might accept it as just the way things are.

You've transcended those old memories, anyhow. You feel a little distant from the person you were centuries ago, and you most likely look different, too. Perhaps you've sprouted giant wings, become a formless void, or you're now a shapeshifter with no permanent appearance. You've gained a substantial amount of power and influence, the type that people of this world attribute to the Gods.

The first half is a more sandbox-like environment designed for scenarios that emphasize CR and personal character moments. Active conflict between the emergent reality and the world will not arise until the second half.

The World as the Divine

The mortals have bestowed you with a title and possibly a new alias. Do you know your mortal name anymore? Some of you might've taken on a new identity, or you might have held very tightly onto who you were. Regardless, your abilities have grown. Your new powers and appearance are as unique as your dominion, influenced by your interests, subconscious desires, or personal relationships.

While in your full God form, you'll move through the world unperceived. Only when you're sought by a mortal - followers, believers, cultists - can you consciously make your complete divine presence known. To be seen freely by all, you'll have to take on a less overwhelming shape to the mortal gaze. Those who have met the Old Gods or Cardinal Gods in the past finally understand why they seldom reveal their true selves, often arriving in hazy visions or speaking through animals.

Exploring the Land

◎ The Witchwood

As the Summoned continued to ascend, their power began to coalesce, creating a new ecosystem never seen before. The dense woods, originally a temperate climate, warmed and grew into a thriving jungle. The air is humid and heavy with magic, the sky locked into an eternal sunset. Reds and oranges filter through the thick canopy. Birdcall and animal cries echo throughout the jungle. Trees and rocks seemingly move at night, meaning the Witchwood is impossible to map. Foolhardy souls who venture too deep are rarely seen again - unless divine intervention prevents a tragic fate from befalling them. Perhaps one of those intervening Gods is you?

The most dangerous beasts in the Witchwood are the demigod spawns. Creatures born from the Summoned, demigods are powerful enough to affect the world around them should they ever leave the magic-encased forest. See Impact & Consequences for more details on the demigods and how, as the Summoned, you can help maintain Abraxas' ecosystem.

◎ Mechapolis

Heartwood Syndrome persisted in Fomalhaut long after the quarantined population died out. The port city stood as a monument to loss for nearly a century until about 200 years in when the Summoned gained notable influence as Gods. This resulted in a slow but steady acceptance of the Singularity's power as a positive force for potential advancement. New Magic boomed, leading to increased sophistication in technology and the refinement of automatons.

Originally designed to clear and guard Fomalhaut, they were eventually used to rebuild it. Fomalhaut became known as the City of Machines and was renamed Mechapolis. Although humans are barred from entering for safety, the automatons gather soil and air samples for study and perform fishing duties. The clockworks require routine maintenance and must return to a hub city or outpost for recalibration. Clockwork birds are used to communicate with Mechapolis. They can broadcast through the Free Cities's primitive "radio" towers.

You can enhance clockwork performance, boosting the towers or providing additional energy to the automatons. Scientists often have "rituals" when performing maintenance or experiments to earn the Gods' favor, hoping this will prevent their inventions from breaking down.

◎ The Barren/The Badlands

Once contested territory between Thorne and the Free Cities, the Badlands was split into two by a large ravine shortly after Thorne retreated to Hayle. With neither side able to breach the gap, Solvunn naturally laid claim to the western half while the Free Cities retained its eastern half. On the eastern side, the chasm swallowed several well-known bandit camps and the presence of a new entity further drove them away. Bandits now occupy the mountains northeast of Aquila. Due to the entity's threat, the Free Cities increased its military presence in the Badlands to keep careless or foolish travelers from straying too far.

Meanwhile, Solvunn has named its portion of the wasteland the Barren and sought the Gods' assistance to form an enchanted forest. Those who enter are lost forever. Meant for more than just protection, the forest and the Barren serve as a place of exile. Heretics are taken into the woods and left to wander towards the Barren's harsh desert. There, they will face the elements, be devoured by the waiting Maw...or encounter a God.

As a God, you can lead the exiles to their salvation or doom, but choose carefully: the Maw is hungry and must be fed. These exiles want you dead. They don't care for you, and should their lack of faith spread, they might revive attempts to destroy the Singularity - and with it, your home. Is it so wrong to leave them to their fate? On the other hand, saving them might convert them by demonstrating your kindness.

◎ The Maw

The Maw lurks beneath the chasm dividing the Badlands. Named for its gaping jaws, the Maw waits at the widest part of a jagged canyon, mouth open and salivating in the desert heat. Rows and rows of teeth as tall as a man spiral downward into a bloodshot throat. When sated, it retreats deep into the gully, barely visible aside from the shine of a tooth. When hungry, it draws closer to the surface. Hot and heavy winds often carry the putrid scent of its half-digested meals.

Solvunn is not the only territory that uses the Maw. The Free Cities will occasionally march criminals and bandits in that direction, as well, tossing them into the gaping mouth, although this method of execution is much rarer. Desperate exiles from Solvunn will try to cross the chasm despite the danger. None ever make it - at least, not without divine intervention.

Horizon, "Death," and Dormancy

Your domain in the Horizon is no longer constrained by size. How it's changed depends on you. The more detached from your mortality, the more likely it'll have surrealist elements: bizarre statues, physics-defying architecture, odd visual or psychological effects. The Horizon feels like home to all Gods, although you ought to take care not to heed its call beyond reason. Shutting yourself off from the physical world can result in unintended consequences...but completely refusing to enter the Horizon will do the same.

Additionally, Gods are beyond true death, but that doesn't mean you can act with impunity. Engaging in an exhaustive battle with other Gods can weaken you into dormancy. In this state, you will enter an ethereal void inside the Singularity. As you heal, you'll slowly be able to return to your Horizon domain and then the physical world once more. Depending on the extent of the damage, this process could take anywhere from months to decades. For instance, losing your head could take a few months, total dismemberment might take a year, and being vaporized into atoms can take a few decades.

Mortals cannot achieve this level of damage, even if they seemingly "succeed" in striking true. Only a God can weaken another God into dormancy. If a mortal removes your head, you can merely pick it up and put it back on.

Impact & Consequences

In the early years of your ascension, you might've wondered why the existing Gods seemingly intervened so little. Why did they not demonstrate their powers more blatantly over the thousands of years? Is it apathy? A desire to watch rather than act? As you come into your abilities, you realize that the Singularity and the universe are significantly more delicate than you thought. You begin to understand why the Gods have behaved the way they do.

Of course, whether you care to keep the world (and yourself) in balance is another story, but to be sure, some of the other Gods and the Summoned do - and you may have to defend your choices.

The equilibrium mechanic is described in OOC terms HERE. The Singularity and a character's ascension will not inherently sway them one way or the other. Any temptations will result from individual personality and development.

Instability Effects

To maintain the universe's equilibrium, you need to be cautious of when and how you interfere when using your status to alter the state of the world. Conversely, you'll also need to take care not to withdraw entirely. Several Gods have undergone periods of instability, though others haven't. Which category you fall under is up to you. It depends on who you are, your experiences, and your desires.

◎ Should you refuse to ACKNOWLEDGE your Godhood or enter the Horizon, you'll find yourself losing time. You may forget how you got from one place to another, or names you knew yesterday slip your mind. Lapses in memory or time can be temporary or permanent, but one thing they are is certainly confusing. With magic building inside you and nowhere for it to go, your power will begin to spill over, causing the Singularity to exhibit bursts of power that spawn demigods in the Witchwood.

◎ Should you give into the temptation to OVERINDULGE your Godhood or retreat to the Horizon for excessive periods, you'll lose more of yourself and your history. You may make decisions that feel unlike you, forget larger chunks of old memories, or struggle to distinguish what's real. Unrestrained use of magic will cause you to absorb yet more power, causing the Singularity to lose power in brief spurts, which can spawn demigods in the Witchwood.

These effects can be halted or even reversed in some cases. You might need someone's help to bring you back or convince you there's another way, or maybe you're the one seeking others out to assist. What you do soon understand is that your ability to manage your powers and stabilize your connection to the Horizon directly affects the Singularity and Abraxas...something that may have been true the moment you were summoned.

Demigod Spawns

Under the red haze of the Witchwood, monstrous creatures known as demigods or spawns emerge from crimson waterfalls and claw their out through the mossy soil. Born out of instabilities caused by careless actions from all Gods, they're usually contained to the Witchwood. For the most part, the older Gods - and the Summoned, if they choose - keep the demigods from leaving. However, now and again, one or two might escape, damaging towns, destroying villages, or causing ecological destruction in ways that are similar to natural disasters.

Demigods are not sentient. How they look can vary, but their appearances are often corrupted and disturbing: twisted animals, amorphous blobs, or alien-like parasites. They may resemble a monster you recognize from home.

Defeating one is possible but a challenge even for the Gods. Most crucially, you cannot kill your own spawn. Another God must deliver the killing blow, so working together is imperative. Should too many demigod spawns be allowed to invade the Witchwood, they will overwhelm and disrupt the Singularity further. Culling them is the only way to maintain stability.

You can submit demigod spawns you create to the WORLDBUILDING section if you want. Similar to using character powers, just keep the scale of destruction at a reasonable level.

Hearing Echoes

Echoes are a form of prayer that resonates through your connection with the Singularity. Solvunn has dedicated a monument to where the "First Echo" was heard, though the accuracy of this is debatable. Like the Network, you can hear an Echo regardless of where you are and can shut them out with concentration. However, your ties to Godhood may compel you to listen every so often. Mortals can entreat you through more formal methods (rituals, offerings, seasonal ceremonies) or in a moment of duress or desperation. They may seek you specifically or call to any God who will listen.

You can answer or ignore these cries for help as you like, but your choices carry consequences. Answer too many too eagerly, and your increased interference in mortal lives can upset the world's equilibrium - and the Singularity. Ignore your impact on the world, and your refusal to accept your ascension will equally destabilize the land as prayers go unheard.

Interacting with Other Gods

The Old Gods and the Cardinal Gods are an equal part of this world. For the most part, you coexist peacefully, though personal pacts and tensions can play a role. Each of you is aware of the impact of your actions on the Singularity: extreme displays of power are reserved for substantial transgressions, considering the price it carries.

Further, the older Gods have also walked the earth for centuries before you came. To them, you're still young, and rising against one of them won't end well for you. Nonetheless, many older Gods are more interested in giving advice or guiding you, ensuring the health of the Singularity and the universe so as not to doom all of you - Gods and mortals alike - to the void.

You can REQUEST AN INTERACTION with a God. Interactions will be brief but informative.

You will not be able to request a specific God. For logistical reasons, we have curated the list of Gods available ahead of time. However, we'll do our best to pick one from the pool that suits the purpose of your request.

Month 3: Awakening

Over the past 2 months, you've existed in the emergent reality without question. As you enter the third month, however, everything you've known over the past many centuries begins to shift. You might decide to investigate further, wondering if there's more out there that you aren't seeing. Alternatively, you might choose to ignore it, believing that your awakening is damaging the world and your life.

Catalysts

A catalyst can occur at any time through any circumstance. Do you see a familiar face you've forgotten in the eyes of a stranger? Do you recall a moment in your past while watching the mortals? Has a friend approached you specifically to try and remind you of the things you've forgotten?

With each memory returned you'll gain another piece of yourself. Depending on how much you've lost and how hard you'll cling to this reality, the effect may be clarifying or it might cause you distress and confusion. You might begin to encounter temporal cracks: buildings or areas that normally don't exist will flicker in and out of existence, or your reflection will briefly show an image of you from before your transformations took hold.

If you allow yourself to doubt your abilities or divinity, you might have trouble controlling your powers. If you've made alterations to your Horizon domain, it might start to revert to its original design.

These cracks are difficult to ignore, but if you bury your head, you can make them disappear - briefly, at least.

Shattered Skies

The effects go beyond the individual. As more of you and your fellow Gods reawaken, the sky also begins to form cracks that spread like broken glass. Through the fractures, you glimpse flashes of lightning and a swirling fog. The fissures only grow larger.

Soon, you realize you can see the Singularity itself, reflected upside-down in the crater. Disconcerting though it is, it may serve as proof that something is very wrong. Of course, you can also refuse to acknowledge this disturbance, closing your eyes to the crumbling sky. Doing so will let you remain unaware to the very end, but your friends who are seeking the truth might find your denial distressing.

The sky won't hold, though. Eventually, it does shatter completely - and you awaken abruptly, your body and others scattered several feet away from the Singularity's crater as if you were physically thrown out. The fog begins to dissipate. The lightning has stopped, the unrelenting storms fading across Abraxas. Whatever you went through, it seems to have done exactly what the territories hoped: stabilize the Singularity.

Characters will be returned home afterward. They will be thanked for their assistance regardless of if they cooperated.

Resistors will not face any consequences, as long as they don't cause excessive trouble upon their return. Officials will issue an apology for the heavy-handed action, stating that they saw no other way to keep the world safe. With the portals and weather returning to normal, it does seem to have worked...even if characters may not find the method agreeable.

---

Comments

cw: self harm ref

[gynvael]

[ He is practically inviting her to explode. He wants it, he is waiting for it, the snap that tells him he's struck a nerve.

It doesn't come. Not yet. ]

No. [ The answer falls like a hammer. ] And I am.

[ No, she did not make or choose this. No, this is not real to him. He is willing to let go of this. He's willing to lose it because it isn't theirs. Perhaps if he were attempting to be kinder, he might've explained, might've tried to couch his words. But he's moved beyond careful nudges. He no longer cares about being gentle. He wants her to wake the fuck up. He wants to know that no matter what, whether the sky collapses or the Singularity swallows them whole, she will remember who she is.

Who they are. Together.

He fixes his gaze on her. Have they changed? His eyes? Can she see something there that was once missing? He feels whole. He thought he understood what it was to be whole, when he finally regained the memories he lost, but now he knows—that was patchwork at best. A glossy veneer.

Abruptly, lightning fast, he reaches for her hands. His grip would be unforgiving were it not tinged with a desperate urgency. He turns her wrists over where her scars sit. They have been there for as long as he's known her. Like her raven locks and lilac eyes, they do not change. He'd wager anything that deep down, she has not forgotten why. What they mean to her. ]

You want to talk about choices? [ His voice hasn't yet risen, but it's close. ] This was yours when you kept them. Tell yourself you've shed your past all you want. You haven't. We can't abandon who we were.

[ They can't forget the mistakes they've made nor the pain they've endured. Where does it leave them? If they cast off their most harrowing memories? What will happen when the little they've held onto now vanish? Will their bland contentment spin endlessly into the abyss? More than anything, he fears failing Ciri again. Faltering in all the ways they once did. How can they protect her if they let themselves sink into this complacent reality? ]

cw: self harm

[vixening]

[ if he's waiting for a snap, he'll see it the moment his answer leaves his lips. the no hits her like a slap, the I am a painful streak across her eyes. she winces, at first, trying to find her footing in that answer. trying to understand how he could be ready to rid himself of everything they've built, everything they accomplished, everything they finally have here that took decades, centuries, her coma, his loss of memories, the fact that they've returned to each other over and over and over- ]

No. [ yennefer spats back, shakes her head, moves as if she's trying to step away from him. but even as she begins to move, she knows she won't get far. knows that it's futile. that tether that binds them together she can feel now, stronger than ever. stronger than it's ever been that she can remember, pulling, holding her there. ] No, I won't-

[ that is when he reaches for her, lightning fast, too fast for her to consider trying to react. his hands are around her hands, turning her wrists up towards her, and yennefer tries to wrench them away. she tries, once, tugging hard only for him to hold them true, hold her in place. the restraints have her eyes wild, a kind of desperate panic to match his own desperation, but this isn't- no, no she's felt this before, hasn't she? been here before. restrained, imprisoned, held down while they pried away from her the very thing she- ]

It was the only choice I got. [ the words burst out of her, through her gritted teeth. they would be a hiss if she had any more control over them, her teeth bared as she tugs on his grip on her. tries to free herself of the hold.

it is only in the moment after, not even half a breath, that what she says sinks in. the fire, the anger, the fury that she had been spitting back in his face stills in place of wide eyes. the memories do not flood back to her so much as strike through her memories like the lightning around them, matching the storm. flashes, moments suddenly clear and then gone, things she had known and things that had made her and all of this, all of these things she'd forgotten- ]

No. [ this time, it's less of a demand. this time, it sounds more like a plea. another flash courses through her, of pain unimaginable. of being remade, for the first time. reborn. she winces, visibly, and when she looks back up to him it's different, he's different. in just a blink and they're in the basement of a crumbling home, he looks- he looks young. she feels young. they are lifetimes away and his hair falls around his face. he might even see it too, her powers changing the very space around them, manipulating the visions, the images. no longer are they surrounded by the same trees they've come to be so familiar with, but instead stone walls, sunlight streaming through glass windows, pillows around their feet.

when did you last feel happy when you were trapped?

is that what she is? trapped? held together by years and years and years of a path she's walked for so long she doesn't know her way back? is there a back to return to, after everything? ] No. [ she turns her wrists in his hands, presses her palms to his chest, and shoves. the image around them breaks, snaps back, and whether or not there is any force to her shove doesn't matter so much now that the scars on her wrists aren't staring back at her. ]

I won't lose this. I won't lose everything. Not again. [ again? again. even that brings with it a weight, a shift, as ash begins to fall around them, gently at first and then thicker, heavier. with each passing second she can feel the weight of those memories bearing down on her, no matter what it is she says. her fingers blacken where they curl on geralt's chest, balling to fists. ]

[gynvael]

[ His grip only tightens, afraid that if he lets her go, he will lose her for good. She will slip away, sink into this reality, and he will be left with only spectres haunting his decaying woods. In this place glutted with time, forever is an unbearable weight to bear without the people he loves.

The tether between them frays. For a moment, he fears its tattered ends will not hold.

It does.

He recognizes the look in her eyes, raw and wounded. He's worn it himself more than once, each time his memories pierced the surface. It grinds glass into your bones, pulling you beneath the earth with cold hands. It isn't, he wants to say. It isn't the only choice she had. They've not had many, but they have had them. He was not sure then, but he knows now that each time they come together, they are doing it because they choose to. There are no tricks or magic or wishes. Destiny cannot compel who makes a home in his heart. She can only determine who passes through its doors.

The forest collapses with Yennefer. The crumbled home swirls into view around them, droplets of melted rime clinging to the window, thin curtains billowing. And then, in a breath, they are further elsewhere. Plush red cushions sprout underfoot—

(I was right about you.
I was right about you, too.)

Geralt stumbles a half-step back, not from the strength of her shove but from the shattering illusion. He is not really what she wants to force away, he thinks.

Her stained hands can't seem to decide whether they mean to clutch at him or push him again. He grasps her by the arm. Instead of pulling her to him, he closes the distance until she's pressed against him and he can feel her breath. Thick plumes of smoke rise into the sky. The sound of crackling flames bursts between his ears. Is it coming from him or Yen? Does it matter? They've both swallowed the taste of ash a hundred times over. ]

You won't. [ The words tear roughly from his chest. ] You won't. We are not bound to this mirage. You, me—our daughter—we belong where we go together.

[vixening]

[ she feels his grip tighten, but it's distant. like something she has to work to understand, something she has to pull through time and space itself. there is roaring in her ears, but she can't place if it's from the space around them or somewhere in the back of her own mind. eight hundred years is a long time to sift through, to have piled up and up and then to try and push away. to try and sieve out eighty years, to pick through memories upon memories, lifetimes upon lifetimes, try find something she'd let herself let go of a long time ago.

the pain is very physical, her reaction more so. and while pain is not something that has ever been unfamiliar to her, this one pulls out a visceral need in her to run. to leave this pain in the past, to rebuild and recreate, to be reborn. but geralt's grip keeps her grounded, keeps her there. he is right to assume she does not mean to push him away so much as to push away everything else, but she doesn't know how.

there is a kind of yell that escapes her, frustrated and pained, through gritted teeth. she can feel the heat in her palms, her hands, and it's possible geralt can as well. she does not call fire to her, does not let her chaos explode, but there is very nearly a promise of it. a threat, if he wants to see it that way. but before anything comes, before any sparks ignite or the smoke gets too thick, geralt steps forward and closes whatever distance had been there between them - pulling her to his chest. smoke and fire, ash and wind, pillar around them.

yennefer lets herself be pressed into him, feels herself curl into his chest. she feels his words more than she hears them, deep, rough gravel she's come to know so well, has always known so well.

you won't he says, no, promises- and it all comes crumbling down. years, decades, aretuza and tissaia, the ascension ceremony, istredd's betrayal. she feels years of pain and frustration, of ambition and ruthlessness. in the single beat of her heart she clips through decades in court, the final straw, her search - however futile - and geralt. jaskier. sodden. her powers, the voleth meir, ciri. geralt says our daughter like it was something that was always that simple, like it was always true. but all this has done is prove to her it isn't, it's never been that simple. they have never been simple.

but is that so bad?

at first she can't breathe, doesn't know if it's the ash in her lungs or the weight in her chest. the things she'd done, the things she chose to do, the things- but then more memories seep through, crash into her. the after. the months of training. ciri. before she knows it, the winds begin to slow, then fade. once again, yennefer cannot be certain she's shaking from the exertion, the exhaustion, or something else. she forces a breath, and then another, before she's able to pull back from geralt enough to look up at him, one last attempt to really see. ]

And our daughter? [ she asks, her voice rough, used. she swallows. it is in the meeting of their eyes that she feels the decision be made - she hasn't yet found her footing in everything she has seen. in everything she feels. ] She... she is going with you?

[gynvael]

[ She collapses into his arms, fire in her hands extinguishing. He already knows she won't hurt him. Not like that, not again; he remembers learning to trust her, the clawing ache it entailed. It means more to him than the easy calm they've held for the past eight centuries.

Geralt holds her tightly. Light shivers run through her as the roaring flames around them slowly die. In Ciri's time, I do not survive. Is that what they're returning to? He doesn't know. He remembers what they left behind in fragments, but not where they were, not what lies ahead. He thinks of Dean, who may not be there when the sky finally shatters. (It is supposed to break. He sees that now. That it is not to be stopped, as he first thought.) Perhaps there will come a time when Geralt will not be there, either—for her or Ciri.

But not yet. ]

Yes. [ Geralt rests his hand against Yenner's cheek, then leans forward until their foreheads touch. The delicate scent of lilacs fills his senses. She is solid beneath his hands in a way she has not been in a long time. (She feels real.) ] She'll be waiting for us.

[ So they must return, to Ciri if nothing else. It's the only way they stay together. He's sure of it. He is. He has to be because what is left of this dream except ashes? Maybe that's all it ever was. Maybe there was nothing of this world except houses made of sawdust.

When he finally releases her, he isn't sure how much time has passed. His eyes are fixed on hers, searching. ] I have to find Jaskier. Will you get Ciri?

[ He needs his friend, too. Ciri is out there somewhere; he had to leave her to get to Yennefer, but she won't have gone far. She understands the truth. Still, he'll feel better if the two of them are together. ]

and wrapped c:

[vixening]

[ geralt may remember all it is they've survived, but yennefer is still feeling the force of it. like a physical weight pressing down on her shoulders as she breathes it in, swallows it down. she feels the full extent of each and every emotion - the regret, the loneliness, the pain, the anger, the power, the rage, the devastation, the hopelessness, the fear. she swallows, trying to push it down, as a single second passes and she moves through the entire length of relationships remembered - people she hadn't known, then did, who she would have burned down the world to protect, who she failed, who she lost.

his grip keeps her upright, keeps her steady as the processes through, and then as the winds begin to die and the fire settles and yennefer feels her lungs fill with air and not ash, she knows that this is it. somehow, the pressure of a few decades feels thicker than that of eight hundred years. somehow, they're still here on the other side of it.

in ciri's time, I do not survive. she does not know if it is geralt's thoughts she reads, or the settling of an understanding she once had. the knowledge that there was, at one point, but had been lost to time. she hates how it curls in her stomach, hates that it doesn't leave, even as she attempts to breathe it out. a large reason she hadn't wanted to let go of this was that for once, she had felt confident in their futures. in what they had, and could have. now?

uncertainty feels somehow both distant and familiar. unwelcome and at home.

she breathes, looks up to him, and as geralt's hand comes to her cheek and their foreheads press, yennefer lets her eyes close. lets her fingers gently grasp at the fabric on his chest. she wants to linger in this moment, wants their time to hold, but even as she wishes for it she knows it to be impossible.

ciri will be there. she needs to find ciri.

when geralt does pull away from her, it does not feel like an end, and perhaps that is the most impressive part about it all. I have to find jaskier he says, and yennefer's hand goes to his arm. squeezes. he does not need her blessing, but there is something else to the way her hand lifts from his arm. they need jaskier, they both do, wherever it is they're going. ]

Of course. I'll find Ciri, and then we'll go together. All together.

[ there is only a short pause before she nods and turns away from him, because they both have someone to find. somewhere to be.

and she does know they'll find each other, in the end. for whatever reason, she believes it to be true. ]