đđĄđĄđŚđ˘ đđ˛đŤđ°đŹđŤ (
satanicpanics) wrote in
abraxaslogs2024-05-14 04:00 pm
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"there must be some kind of way out of here"
Who: Eddie & others
When: Post-event
Where: Solvunn, Horizon, Nocwich
What: Catch-all nonsense
Warnings: Will add if needed!
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á´Ęá´ á´á´á´á´Ę á´á´ á´Ęá´ á´ĘÉŞá´ę°
"á´Ęá´Ęá´'ęą á´á´á´ á´á´á´Ę á´á´É´ę°á´ęąÉŞá´É´
ÉŞ á´á´É´'ᴠɢá´á´ É´á´ Ęá´ĘÉŞá´ę°"
{Open and closed starters to follow! If you want something specific, find me at
muttonchops or poultrylegs @ discord}
When: Post-event
Where: Solvunn, Horizon, Nocwich
What: Catch-all nonsense
Warnings: Will add if needed!
"á´Ęá´Ęá´'ęą á´á´á´ á´á´á´Ę á´á´É´ę°á´ęąÉŞá´É´
ÉŞ á´á´É´'ᴠɢá´á´ É´á´ Ęá´ĘÉŞá´ę°"
{Open and closed starters to follow! If you want something specific, find me at
no subject
He can never say he truly knew Chrissy Cunningham. In another time, maybe they could have made for good friends, but all he really knew was that she was a girl who had more going on than she showed to the small world of Hawkins High. Maybe she was in pain, maybe all of them were in pain, but even a pain that deep isnât incapable of being mended. ]
All kids have shit going on, dude. That doesnât mean they need put out of their misery. Would you have wanted that for you?
[ It's a genuine question. He can only imagine life growing up as a lab rat was sheer misery, so heâs curiousâwhere does that thought process come from, and does it extend to Henry himself? ]
Look, I know, and believe me, I would love to make all of this less backwards and be at your throat right now, buuuutâŚI know what itâs like to be accused of shit you havenât done, and as it stands? This you is sort of innocent of those crimes.
[ Innocent of all crimes? Maybe not, but innocent of the ones Eddie is familiar with? Absolutely. He's granting Henry a lot of grace, but god, it would make things so much easier to be angry and Eddie is practically wishing for a reason to hate him, even if itâs something small and petty. Insult Metallica or something, Henry, thatâs all he needs. ]
I never said that. I just said someone else. Could be anyone else.
[ Okay but itâs pretty obvious. ]
no subject
A keen question from Eddie, and one that works to highlight one of Henryâs most unflattering traits that he usually keeps well-hidden: his hypocrisy. Would he have wanted someone to end his life prematurely, with the justification of putting him out of his misery? And what an array of misery he went through.
No. He wouldnât have. Those twenty long years bolstered his anger, allowed it to fester into something strong, making it the equivalent of his will. Carried him through for so, so long. No one had the right to take that away from him.]
You donât understand what it was like. [Low, bitter.] To be trapped for that long. Even before the lab, the town of Hawkins, that old house my family moved us all to, felt like its own kind of prison. And according to your future, I just end up in another.
[The âUpside Downâ, as they called it. Seven years once again trapped elsewhere, changed, and roiling in anger, alone.]
Donât say you wouldnât have done differently if you didnât know what it was like.
[And maybe that doesnât exactly answer the question âwould you have wanted that for you?â but itâs justification enough for Henry. For now, anyway.
As for the topic of Steve, he has to scoff with a wry sort of ill humor.]
Who else could it be? Is he going to be a problem?
no subject
Yeah. Sounds like you wouldnât have wanted that, huh? Canât imagine any of them did either.
[ Itâs a far cry from the young man who arrived in Solvunn two years ago, still constantly on edge and terrified by his own shadow. That Eddie wouldnât even be having this conversation, let alone weaving in snide comments about he man who killed him and his hypocrisy. Maybe it does have a lot to do with the fact that heâs known Henry for quite some time and doesnât foresee being hurt by him, but maybe heâs also made more personal improvement than he realized.
Or he just doesnât know how to handle all of this and heâs just trying to figure out what sort of reaction makes him feel better about it. ]
Iâm not even gonna pretend I have any comparison for what you went through, because it sounds like hell, but uhâŚwhat youâre saying? Reeks a little bit of hypocrisy.
[ Or a lot.
A whole lot.
He huffs out a sigh and rolls his eyes, determined to not drag Steve into this mess. Steve knowsâof course he knows, why would Eddie leave him in the dark about this? And yeah, Steve is pissed, but this right here--this is just about Eddie and Henry right now. ]
Donât worry about Harrington, alright? Heâs got other shit going on right now.
no subject
Ugly edges that flare at that accusation.]
If you canât tell me how you would have done any differently, other than remain trapped and resigned to your fate, then you donât have any right to call me that.
[Heâs successfully derailed the conversation from any mention of Steve, at least. For now.]
no subject
Yeah, wellâŚI can tell you that I probably wouldnât be killing kids who had nothing to do with it, soâŚ
[ He shrugs and begins pacing a circle around the tree, just to have something else to do with himself. Heâs not scared; thereâs just a baseline of anxiety surrounding the situation that he canât quite shake. Itâs clearly not enough to make him shut up.
Heâll take the opportunity to move on from Steve thank you very much. It would be an enormous a stretch to say that this doesnât involve him tooâit absolutely does and always did, but unlike Eddie, Steve is pissed. Steve isnât hiding the fact that heâs pissed, but Eddie kind of wants to keep him and Dustin as far away from this as he can for now. ]
Iâm not trying to start shit with you, dude. Iâm just saying it like it is. You wanted to fight. You didnât want to be put out of your misery. Maybe they wanted a chance to fight too.
no subject
Somehow, it doesn't quite turn into a conflagration. Just a little burning ember, stewing inside of him. That's frustrating, too.]
Well, that's not how the world works, is it? [He presses the palm of a hand flat against the tree trunk, leans forward a little towards Eddie, brow furrowed.] The strong oftentimes devour the weak.
[You know, like a spider devouring its prey. Like a predator having no other choice. That's what it comes down to.]
I wasn't going to sit in the lab and rot away for the rest of my days. Or in that future, just wait for someone to find me. No one is ever coming for help.
[20 years in Brenner's lab has made Henry realize this intrinsically.]
If I had to do "bad" things to escape, then so be it. It's really as simple as that, Eddie â you don't have to agree.
no subject
Jesus Christâ
[ itâs all so absurd. He drags his hands down his face and he just has to laugh. ]
This is a joke, man. The fact that I canât even properly argue with you about this is a joke. What the hell?
[ No, maybe he doesnât understand. Maybe he can never understand. Only the other people who were in that lab can possibly understand. But Eddie does understand the concept of the âthe means justify the endsâ, and if Henryâs wrath began and ended with the lab workers or the people who put him in there to begin with, Eddie would easily turn a blind eye. A handful of stupid high school students didnât put him in there, soâŚwhat does this mean? Henryâs just an evil person? Surely not. ]
What do they have to do with it, though? Seriously, thatâs what Iâm stuck on, and yeah, I know you haven't done it yet, but just humor me with a guess. What does killing the depressed, small town, painfully ordinary high school students get you?
rises from my grave
And how is he supposed to answer that when, intrinsically, he knows himself just well enough to equally know the answer: because it always feels good to take your anger out on something.
He settles on something in-between. Eddie's laugh borders on rankling him, but he lets it side to the back of his mind for now.]
From what I can "recall"? A way out.
[To be free. Maybe that's what Eddie doesn't understand. Henry, even back at HNL, would do nearly anything to guarantee his freedom; and he had almost been free and unstoppable had Eleven not banished him... somewhere. That other realm that Eddie speaks of, that he now has context for.
And maybe that's the sticking point. Henry has very few moral lines in the sand that he'l not cross for the sake of clawing himself back into freedom, and setting things right.]
That me from the future... [It's hard to still think of "Vecna" as "himself." So changed with the course of seven years.] ...wanted to be free and change the world. Do you think a few teens would have given him reason to stop?
no subject
Even outside of the lab, Hawkins was stifling and cruel and maybe they were all looking for a way out of that shitty little town at the end of the dayâbut very few of them were actually trapped by any of it. Their opportunities just hadnât come yet, but what opportunity would ever come at the expense of someone elseâs life?
Heâs scrubs his face with his hands, huffs out an empty chuckle. ]
You know what, man? If you ever figure it out for sure, you just let me know.
[ He doesnât really want to just leave this conversation open-ended. He came here hoping for answers or a fix, but it feels like theyâve reached an impasse. Henry canât truly know why he ends up doing what he does, and Eddie canât possibly know if Henry doesnât know. ]
I donât know what to do about this, soâŚ
[ So, say something if you do, is what he seems to be implying. ]