abraxaslogs | open 💫 lights out tonight

[ Himeka will admit she's a little disappointing and not terribly surprised that she's been turned down--maybe not wholly, if only because it doesn't seem like that long ago that Nebula would have taken up the offer even if she made a point about it. Though she's aware that everything that came to pass didn't, technically, did they not still experience it all the same?

Still, one thing that is consistent is that Himeka is patient. She accepts the explanation for what it is and nods, readjusting the weight of the parcel she ought to be delivering. But, no, she's still here offering another olive branch. ]

Well, mayhaps you should stop by the treehouse when you get some time. For dinner or something? If your host family won't mind your absence.

[ Another nail, another hammering. For a moment she briefly misses how they'd repair things on Knowhere or the Bowie - really anywhere else - even if she often chose the harder way. At least it would go faster, but she's not sure she wants that. Not with Himeka so close and some irritatingly confusing bubbling feelings in her stomach. ]

I don't have a host family.

[ She says quickly, perhaps a touch too - like the fact doesn't mean she's ?? living in the woods like some hobo, probably?? She can't trust the people here, less so now after their behavior a few weeks prior. How quickly people in? ]

[ Nebula doesn't let that seed further in as she considers the first question. It feels rude to decline, now, but also: ]

Fine, but only if Rocket is okay with it.

[ Because she thinks - knows? - he's probably less okay with all of this than she is. ]

[ No host family? Himeka is almost surprised until she thinks about it--Nebula hasn't struck her as someone who wants to depend on the kindness of others if she can avoid it since they met.

A part of her wonders how long it may have taken them to cross paths if Rocket hadn't been something of an anchor for their friendship. (Yes, the F word.)

So she does have to ask in her usual non-roundabout way: ]

Where have you been staying?

[ Which is a question that hangs into the air as easily as she tries to cover any assurances needed. ]

Oh, I'm certain he will be. Honestly, I think most of us wouldn't mind a little extra company.

[ Her mouth twitches, like she expects some kind of answer of disappointment from Himeka with her answer. ]

The woods. [ Plainly given, even if to her ears she knows how the other might respond. ] I know how to set up shelter and I've faced worse than most of the fauna here.

[ She can handle herself, she says without saying, taking out a breath as she steps back from her work for the moment. ]

I'm not pleasant company.

[ No disappointment follows, only open curiosity. Like Aloy, she thinks? Aloy had made quite a homestead for herself in the woods and, technically, Himeka and the others did something of the same too...just with a lot of community volunteering and no small amount of magic. A labor of love, she thinks, but she can see how the alternative might seem more appealing to Nebula.

Himeka doesn't mind camping it out, she's does so often on her own travels, but there is something to have a reliable roof and sauna dug underground. ]

Do you like it?

[ Because, really, that's the most important thing. If Nebula actually enjoys it, rather than feeling that she has to.

To her final comment, Himeka does smile a little conspiratorially. ]

I think we can be the judge of that.

Staying out there? [ She returns, mouth forming a line. She shrugs after a moment. ]

Better than being under someone's eye.

[ And that's a good enough reason to "like it," right? Especially in a place so distant from things she knows. ]

[ Nebula rolls her eyes in what could be called a good-natured manner, huffing out a breath. ]

Suppose you will. [ Resigned as she adds, ] I'm not much for table conversation. Didn't have that growing up.

[ Under someone's eye...constantly monitoring, perhaps? She can see why that would be upsetting. There's freedom in being by yourself, though Himeka greatly prefers the company of others most of the time.

Which, upon returning from their "trip" to the Singularity, the treehouse feels...less lively. They hadn't had the time to fully settle into Nero's absence with all that had been happening. But now? It's palpable. ]

What about with friends?

[ It's an innocent enough question, isn't it? One that certainly couldn't be leading to something more. ]

That's alright. You don't need to talk to enjoy someone's company. I'll only be upset if you turn your nose up to the food.

[ Nebula has no desire to stay in the Primary Settlement, it's something she'd settled on before. Helping and keeping an eye on things (on children) was a quiet effort, but she wanted no more closeness than she had. The Settlement felt off in a way she disliked. ]

[ Himeka's question is thus one that catches her off guard and is perplexing. Brows furrowing as she folds arms across her chest, metal over organic. ]

What do you mean?

[ Staying in the woods? She'd rather not, with most things, but she's not going to make assumptions. ]

I wouldn't turn my nose up at food, even if it was disgusting. [ ... ] And so far yours hasn't been.

Good, that was the right answer.

[ About her food, that is. Himeka may be easy going about most things, but she takes a lot of pride in the meals she produces. And Nebula is one that she's determined to get to say she likes something.

Himeka knows she's capable of it. She's seen it, even if it was an alternative reality or something.

That being said... ]

We have plenty of room to spare if you fancy a few nights indoors.

[ Her mouth twitches: ]

And if I gave the wrong answer?

[ She doubts Himeka would do something - at least not anything that fit the backlog of what she knew as a punishment. She doesn't seem the type. ]

[ Or maybe she is, in a different way, the suggestion making Nebula stop and look her over. Blinking once before shifting back from the house she'd been working on. ]

Why offer? I've been fine so far.

Then I'd ask for a detailed explanation of what had gone wrong in the meals you've had thus far.

[ It may not seem like a punishment, per se, but it's also probably the last thing someone wants to do. ]

And I'd need to remake them several times until I can get them right.

[ Or that. Which could be a good thing, if you want more food, or a bad thing, if you want to avoid prolonged culinary discourse. ]

Why not?

[ It's the easy, carefree answer that Himeka is prone to give when it comes to being social. But even though she came to enjoy Nebula's company in leaps and bounds in that strange reality they shared, there is a more somber reason. ]

...The treehouse has been a little quieter of late. I know I'm not the only one who wouldn't mind the company.

[ They're down one very important family member. And all three of them are feeling it. ]

[ She doesn't ask why food is so important to her. It's not just from her own experience already, but the eight hundred years where it became Himeka's thing. It doesn't stop her from breathing out a sigh that's more of a grunt: ]

You'd have to make me.

[ In the tone of "you couldn't" - maybe it's a challenge to be a challenge? ]

[ Why not, Himeka wagers and Nebula presses her lips together. There's a million reasons why not. She'd said as much earlier: She's not pleasant company. And the way Himeka continues to phrase it is as a favor to them. She wants to say how she's not good company. Certainly, she's not particularly loud company. Nor is she the kind of person capable of making anyone else feel better. ]

[ Reasonably, she continues to think: Why her? ]

Isn't there someone else - [ a beat, punctuated: ] better? Maximoff has already proven she can do anything she wants on her own.

[ Which means, it's not like she can do chores or anything helpful? Nebula, incapable of seeing how she can do something for someone that isn't laboring. ]

You must have plenty of friends around here.

[ It certainly sounds like a challenge. And something Nebula has likely also figured out, she has a very difficult time backing down from a challenge...especially a culinary one. ]

I accept.

[ Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Someone else "better"? Himeka's brows purse together at that, but the concept itself isn't exactly foreign, not feeling like the right choice. Not feeling like you fit in to a specific scenario or place.

There are a multitude of different reasons Himeka could come up with to try and convince otherwise, but Nebula generously supplies one of her own. ]

I do.

[ Her expression turns hopeful. ]

And you're one of them. Is that not enough?

[ Nebula bristles like a cat startled to annoyance. I accept, the other says and she rolls her eyes - hard, abject annoyance (disinterest). She knows exactly what the other means and that's precisely was she drops hands from what she's doing and folds them against her chest. The positioning a tight, closed off one as she leans against the wall she'd been working on and looking at anywhere but Himeka. ]

[ Objectively, Himeka's achieved the maximum tsundere response of: yeah, I know you do. And because of that, she says nothing at all. ]

[ The fact she's already not looking at her is helpful as she speaks further - tries to distance herself from the other. Or, perhaps it's as much distancing as it is not believing anyone outside of the guardians (or the avengers) would want anything to do with her. But then... ]

[ There's that fragile softness in Nebula. In the one that had been broken so many times and had to be reinforced by anger-filled steel. The side that still wants family and freedom and - The side that still speaks with her own sense of honesty even if it's warped behind protective walls. There are two people in this world who seem to wiggle their way in, who that part of her desperately wants to believe in their earnesty. ]

[ She hates that she wants to let them - no matter their history. That it somehow overwrites the statement she wants to give, If you knew what I've done you wouldn't want to be. But Himeka only knows this Nebula and this Nebula - this one tries her damnedest not to be the things she once was. ]

[ Still. She doesn't deserve friendship. ]

[ Her expression shifts from that steely annoyance and her posture loosens. Perhaps "loosens," too is wrong - she keeps the same stance, but the hand that grasps desperately at an elbow in some semblance of control trembles slightly. The organic one, not the metal, so she doesn't feel it against the metal arm. She's quiet - for too long to be reasonable - stewing. ]

Shouldn't you ask someone to be your friend first?

[ The question isn't mocking, rueful perhaps - like some part of her thinks Himeka will regret it one day. She still hasn't looked at her, because it's the next words that's a little more tricky. A lot more tricky. That earn another brief pause and her gaze downward. ]

We're friends.

[ There's something in the way she says it - It's not her dry usual manner of speaking. Lacks the slightly robotic tinge she still often speaks in, but it's thick and heavy. Appreciation. Consideration. She appreciates it more than she can verbalize. She sighs.]

It's enough.

[ What the hell is she getting herself into? ]

open 💫 lights out tonight

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sorry that this response is just five years of nebula's mental process