abraxaslogs | open | excuse my ego, can't go incognito

[ There were some days that Cassian was surprised he’d made it as many solar years as he’d had. His recklessness in his youth had been the death of Maarva at times and a constant source of their bickering. Unfortunately age had done nothing to weasel that out of him.

Even without knowing the tragically short lifespan of demigods like Annabeth and Percy, he still hopes that they live long lives.

The mention of her mother again pricks at his curiosity, but he stands fast to his decision not to probe. It was better to stay on lighter topics. But that unfortunately meant that he had to deliver on creating a bantha in the horizon.

For fucks sake.

He rolls his eyes. ]

You’re pushy too. I see why you both get along.

[ ‘Both’ being Annabeth and Bee. Bee only whirs a little in protest but Cassian has already shut his eyes, drawing on the image of a bantha in his mind along with the very brief, impromptu lesson Wanda had given him. It’s not as easy as creating Bee had; he’d grown up alongside the droid whereas bantha’s didn’t exist on Ferrix. But after a moment he feels the threads of magic weave together and when he opens his eyes next, a large, wooly creature stands before them.

He can’t stop the hint of wonder in his voice from slipping out. ]

…That’s a bantha.

[ she bites back a grin at being called pushy as well as the eye roll, if only because she knows it's not an insult, or meant to be rude. he's comparing her to bee, who he obviously as some kind of affection for. ]

Two against one. Maybe we just know what we're about. [ she leans over to pat the droid's head. ]

[ annabeth is curious as cassian gets to work, both in watching how he creates as well as whatever he ultimately brings to life. there's a lot she finds fascinating about the horizon - and she's a quick learner, if the massive size of her domain house has anything to show for it, but it doesn't mean she isn't interested in how other people work through it. ]

[ she barely notices cassian's own surprise at his success, because she's too busy gaping with delight as the bantha fully shapes before them. her face lights up as she studies it, feet moving to circle the creature. ]

It's got goatish horns, almost like a ram. [ she knows he probably doesn't have any idea what she's talking about when it comes to earth animals, but the rambling is largely born out of simple intellectual curiosity. it's not dissimilar to how she could be sometimes, as a god. ] And the fur is like a mammoth, but those are extinct. Rhino feet? Or an elephant... the elephant might make more sense, given the shaggy mammoth fur.

[ she finally looks back at him. ] Do you think I could touch it? You said they're docile, right?

Edited 2024-06-26 19:11 (UTC)

[ Apparently bickering is a form of affection in Cassian’s world. At least towards certain people which now apparently includes Annabeth. It’s shockingly easy to slip into old habits formed from fake memories, something that he thinks he should be more careful about.

But his dynamic with her is something he can ruminate over later because the alternative is missing out on the joy that is practically brimming from the demigod. It’s familiar. It warms his heart in a way that he wouldn’t admit aloud. Just because he doesn’t voice it however, doesn’t mean that it doesn’t show in the way his eyes glint and the corners of his lips twitch.

Her question is answered first by looking up towards the bantha with its kind eyes that he can sort of make out through the shaggy fur hanging low. ]

Go on. The ones I met enjoy being scratched just behind their horns.

[ annabeth loves a good bickering. and it's surprisingly easy to fall into the teasing banter with cassian that's so reminiscent of their time as sibling gods. he doesn't seem to mind it, so neither does she. it's easy to just let herself be herself with cassian, like she doesn't have to prove herself with him anymore. ]

[ when he tells her it's safe to touch it, annabeth doesn't hesitate. she sweeps in closer to the bantha and runs her hand along the fur. it's strange, knowing this is some weird psychic plane of existence and yet the physicality feels real. it's softer than she expected, though it's not like mammoths are still alive for her to compare. ]

[ after a few moments, she stretches up on her toes to do as suggested and scratch behind the horns. ]

Can I name it?

[ annabeth chase, daughter of a war goddess, survivor of tartarus, secret animal lover. she played fetched with cerberus! she loves this weird creature guy already. ]

[ If he were being honest, this bickering was something he hadn't really had with Kerri either. They had both been a little too young, a little too intent and focused on ensuring that they survived to have the luxury of bickering in a carefree way. It's nice - a thought that he doesn't quite allow to form fully either.

Just like how this is also objectively nice. Watching the joy that Annabeth exudes upon meeting the temporarily nameless bantha. When she asks he seems amusedly puzzled but he nods. ]

Why not?

[ Which he realizes means that the bantha was likely to stick around. ]

[ annabeth has had a strange variety of siblings - her mortal half brothers, her fellow children of athena, the broken rescue of thalia and luke - and the way she's interacted with all of them varies just as much as they do. the bickering is familiar with cassian in another different way. ]

[ her smile softens a little when he agrees, but then her expression becomes contemplative as she mulls over what to call such a creature. she's never had a pet, but part of her always wanted one, so she can't help but want to name this thing. she scritches behind its horn, then drops down to walk over and look at its face again. it only blinks in return. ]

Antoni. [ she nods at the bantha, as though it understands her and the name she's just given it. ]

[ The bantha - or Antoni rather - seems to regard the slight girl before giving her a gentle (for a bantha) head butt of affection. But that's not all. As soon as he's done with his nuzzling, Antoni sees fit to give Annabeth a big, wet, lick drawing a short, bark of a laugh from Cassian and a whirl of protest from Bee. ]

I think that means he likes it.

[ Cassian has never had a pet either. He had always been on the move, rarely staying in Ferrix for long stretches of time. A pet required attention and time that he simply felt he didn't have. And the last thing he wanted was to saddle Maarva with one as her health began to rapidly decline over the years. ]

Why Antoni?

[ her expression briefly softens as the bantha headbutts her, but it's ruined soon enough by the giant slobbery lick of affection it gives her soon after. ]

Eugh! [ even with the cry of disgust, annabeth can't help the stuttered laugh that follows it. she pushes idly at the bantha's face, but leaves her hands buried in the fur there and scratches its chin instead. the transience of her own life hasn't given her much opportunity for pets either. ]

After Antoni Gaudí. He was a famous architect where I'm from, in a country called Spain. His designs were considered deeply influential to modernism, or modernisme in Catalan, which is what he was. He used a lot of geometric and natural influences in his designs, and he liked to use 3D models instead of sketches to showcase his plans. There are a lot of perks to the models like that, but I haven't tried too much of it myself. I think there's kind of an element to surrealism in his buildings, and there are tons of gothic techniques too, that's not just my argument -

[ and lo, annabeth continues to ramble about gaudi and will continue to do so for a few minutes, until cassian deigns it time to interrupt. she will also continue petting antoni the entire duration, because it's a good name sake for a good bantha. ]

[ Antoni isn’t deterred by the sound of disgust from his new friend. In fact it just encourages him to nuzzle into her more. Apparently it hadn’t taken him long to bond with her - and it leaves Cassian wondering how the bantha can have a mind of its own when his maker (Cassian) was hardly the most affectionate type.

But maybe his namesake is. Not that Annabeth would be privy to that information. Although if the way she’s rambling is anything to go off of…she might. Maybe he should ask.

…If she ever decides to take a breath that is. One part of him is curious to see just how much she knows about this Antoni Gaudi, while the other is concerned that she might actually run out of air. The latter wins out. ]

So you admire him.

[ not even the nuzzling deters her gaudi rant, because she just keeps talking through it, even as she leans into the bantha's affection and pats her own hand against its fur too. she doesn't think anything of a fake creature's affection, not when she's got architecture on the brain. ]

[ she does not need to breathe, she's fine, but it's probably for the best when cassian finally interrupts. she doesn't seem bothered by it. ]

I do. I'd really like to see his work in person one day. He's innovative, and there doesn't seem to be a point in designing buildings that don't try something new. That's how you make something that lasts.

[ that part of her godhood certainly stemmed from reality, and perhaps the nature of her under construction domain house makes a little more sense. ]

Will this guy... stick around? [ hm. she wants him to. but she's not gonna be direct about it. ]

Edited 2024-07-04 03:08 (UTC)

[ Part of him expects to see some sort of sheepish embarrassment. Instead unabashed enthusiasm remains. He doesn't know why he feels an odd sense of pride well up like a spring in his chest. Or rather he does know, because of what they had just gone through, but when he peels that back, he finds it doesn't matter.

Someone's passions for a hobby, for an art, had been something he can never say that he's experienced himself. There had never been a moment for him to explore that because every waking moment was spent trying to survive. Anything else felt like a luxury he couldn't afford. So to see this in front him - he's glad that she isn't the same as him in that regard. ]

You will. [ There's a sincerity to his voice. ] I don't doubt that.

[ As he says it, another layer of quiet conviction settles on top of what already exists. They would find a way home for those that wanted to go home. They would. As for Antoni -

Cassian's gaze goes to the bantha whose soulful brown eyes stare back at him. He offers his own gentle pat. ]

He will if you want him to.

[ when it felt like she had nothing else, annabeth always had architecture. it started as a niche interest and became something she clung to, a window into allowing her to create permanence. that underlying feeling is why it had been so hard for her to be pulled from the illusion, beyond anything else. ]

[ she doesn't smile at cassian when he so confidently tells her she'll get to spain one day, despite not even knowing what spain is she's sure, but something in her face softens anyway. it's nice, to have someone believe in it for her. ]

I hope so. [ she has to get back home first, and finish a war. but maybe one day. she turns her attention to antoni, scratching through his fur again to avoid how that makes her feel. ]

Yeah. I do want him to stick around. [ she is definitely mostly talking about the bantha. ] There's plenty of space for him here.

[ in her domain with it's big and grassy and spacious outdoors, there's plenty of room for a bantha creature. clearly she's not talking about the house, that's big enough for a lot of people who aren't there. ]

[ He can appreciate the beauty in architecture, but so rarely does he have time to sit back or stand to admire it. A building is a building. Its design mattered little to him so much as what purpose it served. And in his mind, they were all so impermanent like so many other things in his life. It was the people that moved within them, lived and existed within them that brought it to life that mattered to him.

But maybe there were those that could capture that feeling in the form of wood, brick and stone. Maybe Antoni Gaudi had been one of them and that was why Annabeth admired him so much. He can only speculate however.

Her answer is met with a quiet nod of understanding and a held look. Reading into the topic of whether or not a magicked bantha could stay or if they were talking about something else isn't something he particularly wants to dwell on - even if the answer would still likely be the same. ]

Then he'll stay. [ His gaze lingers for a beat longer before moving back to Antoni. ] He might get lonely after a while though. They're pack animals.

[ Now they're definitely just talking about the bantha. ]

[ for annabeth, all of seven and living in a cycle of people who wove in and out of her life, the ability to create a structure capable of giving her a real home stuck with her. it's partially what she's attempting here and now in the horizon, trying to figure out what a home is supposed to look like, though she doesn't quite realize it yet. ]

[ plus, she's just a fucking nerd with a giant ego. she really does want to leave a mark on her world. to prove she's important. ]

I can always make him some friends. Camp Half-Blood's still missing some of its more friendly creatures here. [ like pegasi. ]

I have a question. About your name. [ it seems like it comes out of nowhere, but it's been lingering in the back of her head, waiting for the opportunity to pop out. this might not be the right opportunity but her adhd says otherwise. ]

[ That’s something he’d tease her about if he ever found out. Affectionately of course. He can’t say he shares a similar desire; does he now want to try and change the galaxy for the better? Yes. But he could care less if people know or remember his name. The work, the end result, is more important than the fame or infamy.

The mention of other friends or creatures in this case makes Antoni snort in approval as he moves to nuzzle Annabeth again. ]

I think he likes the sound of that.

[ If he thinks that the topic of his name is out of place he doesn’t let on. Actually, he half expected this conversation to happen, not necessarily with Annabeth, but with others in general. ]

Yes?

[ if she's important, no one can ever leave her behind! ]

[ a smile flickers on her face again when antoni nuzzles her, and she leans her head against him again. perhaps she's always wanted a pet because pets will always give you affection. ]

Then I'll have to work on that for him.

[ she considers what she wants to ask of him carefully, still wary about spooking him off. she keeps her head against antoni, idly petting him because it makes for a good distraction. ]

You told me your name was Alyx. But I know you're Cassian. [ her eyebrows wrinkle thoughtfully for a second. ] You're Cassian in my head now.

Back home, names are powerful. Important. Sometimes we have to be careful about them. [ she's gotten more lax over the years, the more angry she gets, but it doesn't change the fact that names in her godly world matter significantly. ] So I guess I just want to know... what you want me to call you? If Cassian is a secret, I can keep it one.

We can work on it together. [ A ghost of a smile appears on his face. ] They're from my galaxy after all.

[ Annabeth's question is exactly what he expects it to be and she isn't the first to ask him that since they'd woken up from that dream. A part of him isn't surprised to recall that he'd gone by several different monikers during their time as gods. In that sense it made it no different from his life now.

Common sense tells him that he should insist that he be referred to as Alyx but there's no point in it now. But in the same breath, if people knew now that his name was Cassian then what was the point in trying to hide it from the Summoned? Especially someone like Annabeth who had shared history with. For her to call him anything else feels...odd.

He can appreciate the idea that there's power in names. But he's tossed his aside so many times that it's easy to forget that's the case. ]

You can call me Cassian. That's my name. But I'd prefer to called Alyx in public.

[ There's a pause. ]

...Thank you for asking. [ And then because it almost feels too serious - ] Is that your way of telling me that your name isn't Annabeth?

[ something very small brightens in her at the offer. like it's more proof he's not really going anywhere. ] Yeah. We could do that.

[ annabeth waits with a surprising amount of nerves for his answer to his name, because she hadn't been lying about the meaning and power behind them. she wants to know him as cassian, not a pseudonym, but she absolves to respect whatever he decides. she can do that much for him. so when he tells her she can keep calling him cassian, it feels like a bubble of tension in her deflates. she nods, very seriously, though a smile tugs at the corner of her mouth. ]

Alyx in public. I can do that. [ cassian when it's just them implies, again, they'll spend more time together, and she doesn't quite want to vocalize it, like it could be snatched away just as quickly. ]

[ but then she snorts, rolling her eyes. ] No, I'm only Annabeth. Annabeth Chase, Daughter of Athena.

[ not that it means anything to him, but given the name topic, she feels compelled to include it. he shared and allowed his real name for her - it's like the least she can do. ]

[ Her brightness is as slight as his own can be, but he senses it all the same. And that is ultimately keeps that ghost of a smile on his face that much longer, warmth lingering in the air long after it actually dissipates.

She is right in saying that that name means nothing to him. All the intricates and the power that mark Athena as a goddess to be feared and in awe of are lost on him. However, he understands what saying it means. It's an extension of trust. Something that they'd both had an unwavering amount of in the dream. The regret he has about cracking some of her dearly yearned future still lingers and has been by no means forgotten; and while he's gotten better at apologizing for things he's done, he's not certain if he wants to bring it back up now. Not when it feels like they've been dancing around the topic the entire time or that she wants to address it at all.

For a moment he regards her before extending a hand to shake - almost like a way of starting over. ]

Cassian Jeron Andor. Son of Maarva and Clem Andor.

[ They were not gods. They had been people, flawed as humans were, but no less important to him. He hopes that Annabeth will hear that in what goes left unsaid. ]

Edited 2024-07-14 04:17 (UTC)

[ he gives his full name, and it surprises her so much that there's an awkward delay before she realizes he's offering his hand out to shake alongside it. she shoves her own out and clasps his hand, and it's very likely he'll feel the callouses in her palm. she shakes it firmly, but without any testing. it's almost affectionate, despite herself. ]

Thank you, for trusting me with your name.

[ and with his parents. she hears it and recognizes the certain level of gravity that comes with sharing that much of himself, because - well, it might be like a re-introduction, but annabeth still knows a lot about cassian and knows that he is certainly not effusive. he hoards secrets like a weapon, and to be trusted with this one means a lot to her. ]

[ she doesn't feel the need to add her own father's name in kind. ]

[ Awkward pauses aren't typically enough to make him feel awkward in turn. But perhaps because she's younger, or because of their supposed shared history, he feels it creep at the edges of his own typical steady nature. Thankfully neither of them have to sit in it for very long. He returns her handshake, strong and steady before letting go, the callouses not going unnoticed. ]

Thank you for trusting me with yours. And the name of your mother.

[ He sticks his resolve about asking no further questions about her despite the twinge of curiosity that wants him to. Most of the time he can leave things alone - but he finds himself wanting to learn more about Annabeth; to compare what he knew to what is actually true. To learn what is fact from fiction. That will come in time though.

Antoni breaks the silence, letting out another bray as he begins to trudge off further into Annabeth's domain. Bee lets out a somewhat startled sound before trundling off after the bantha, apparently taking it upon himself to be his keeper. Cassian watches them both before letting out a somewhat fond sigh. ]

I think Antoni helped himself to a tour. Can I tag along?

[ suddenly she is very overwhelmed. annabeth is... happy that cassian seemingly wants to stick around and glad that they both seem to feel a little awkward about everything, but there's still a lot to process. she pulls her hand back as he does and tries not to fidget. processing her emotions is definitely not always her strong suit. ]

[ trust. sometimes annabeth thinks she trusts too easily and sometimes she thinks she's far too wary. she's still figuring out the best middle ground for herself. thankfully, antoni's noises give her something else to focus on beyond her scrambling emotions. ]

[ she watches the bantha meander off with a certain fondness in her expression, only to startle herself as bee takes off after it with noise of his own. she lets out a puff of a laugh before she nods at cassian, already agreeing to a tour without even thinking about it. ]

He'll probably like the strawberry fields. I can show you.

open | excuse my ego, can't go incognito

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wrap soon? 💕

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