abraxaslogs | [ OPEN ] the river's overrun

Entry tags:

[ OPEN ] the river's overrun

Who: Claude and various
When: July + August
Where: The Free Cities, the Horizon, TBA
What: Catch all for both months + open TL for Free Cities quests for July
Warnings: None currently, will add/mark as needed

( open + closed starters below | action, prose, and wildcards all welcome | find me at

indech, by PM, or on discord to plot something! )

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[It may be the first time he has had anything to truly smile about, and for it to last so long. The press of their bodies is unfamiliar and electric; it burns like the light he's held in him since the day he was born.

There is a lifting of weight. For once, he is not thinking of his guilt, or his regrets, or his loss.]

Stumbling is... the correct term, I think.

[As much as a newborn drake that has yet to understand where its legs end and its wings begin, so, too, Dion feels he is approaching an entirely new experience. This is not... this is not how he was with Terence, where he always knew where he stood, what Terence thought of him. Still so much of Claude is covered in fog; details of his world, of his life beyond the monastery. The war he was pulled into. The war he survived to be here.

He leans into the hand upon his face.] You captured some parcel of my heart before we were ever gods. That, I can promise you. But I was not sure... if you had the room for such affections.

Maybe I shouldn't say 'maybe' at the start of that, then.

[ With a slight grin for some fun at his own expense for intentionally choosing to do that again - especially when maybe doesn't have a place here. It's more of a definite thing; how couldn't it be when what Dion says feels so grounding? A contrast to the ways Claude voices things evasively himself so often as a defense against figuring out where someone else might stand.

He's reminded again of the unflinching sincerity Dion's offered him time after time, and now is not the time to leave loose ends anywhere when time together in person just like this is limited. The Horizon even with as much as it can do would not be quite the same as being able to stand here wrapped up in each other. ]

The same is true for me again, though it took me longer to know it than I wish it would have since we could have had this sooner. There's not much I wouldn't want to stumble into with you, Dion. So long as we do it together.

[ Room certainly brings about another thought with it that's been in the back of his mind. One which was going to be inevitable no matter what and even more so now when there's an important consideration to that in what Dion's feelings on it may be. Claude doesn't withdraw when he shifts since it's not to pull away but rather to move his hand still lingering in that additional embrace just enough to also brush back some strands away from Dion's face gently. ]

I always have room for you. Though you should know you aren't the only one who has a part of my heart, and because of that I wouldn't ask you to to limit where yours goes now or at any other time. None of that changes how I feel about you, but I understand if it does for you or if you need time to think about it beyond this.

I wouldn't have asked for this to happen any other way.

[The time it took makes it all the more precious, just as his time with Claude as a god was -- those lazy afternoons in the sun, chasing after his attentions, was wavering and energetic as they were.

But those same memories is why he mentioned room at all. While some things happened during those memories that would never happen again, or come to pass -- his dalliance with Ramuh comes to mind -- he would be remiss to not recall the triumvirate Claude had once been a part of, bound so tightly together they could hardly be separated.

He shifts, his hands to Claude's waste. A little room to breathe, but he is unwilling to stop touching him now he has gotten the contact he has craved so terribly.] I admit, such a concept is new to me. [He looks down, clamouring for the same bravery that had him confront the emperor.] I have never had an opportunity to have an open heart. And you -- I can hardly believe mine is the only heart you have a hand on. As long as you are happy, Claude. That is all which matters to me.

[ No, he wouldn't either. The wish for more of this in the past is a fleeting one when after it's said it's replaced with knowing there will be more moments yet to come in the future, and that's a realization no less thrilling. Each of those steps - or stumbles, as so named - led them to here, and for that Claude can only be grateful.

The same is true for the end of Dion's considering throughout which he'd watched carefully. Claude would be deceiving even himself if he pretended like that he didn't inaudibly let out a breath he hadn't entirely noticed he was holding in. ]

If time here has taught me anything, it's that more can be possible than I'd ever guessed. And if there's something you want which wasn't possible where we've left behind, it's worth pursuing.

[ A teasing undertone is notably left out of those words. For he means the ones already said and the ones yet to come; for the vulnerability Dion's already extended, Claude knows he's long overdue to do the same. Having not stepped out of any closeness is all the encouragement he needs to shift again, but this time to wrap his arms around Dion's shoulders. ]

There was a time... well. More like years in my life where I believed I'd find no one at all and made peace with it if it meant I could accomplish the other dreams I had. Believe me when I say I'm the last person to have expected ending up with this instead.

But just as that was my choice - and others' - to find happiness, I meant it about yours, too. You make me happy, and I want to do the same for you. Whether that's with me or wherever anything might lead, I won't stop trying for that when it's what you deserve.

[They are words true to his heart. After all, his living at all is an impossibility. And yet here he stands. He thought, after Terence, there would be no more for his heart in his world, or any world. And he meant it to be so; Terence had been by his side for nearly his entire life, and no one can replace him.

He does not mean to replace him. He does not wish to spill any blood nor blood on Terence's name. He cannot know where he is now, how he fares, with his prince having been gone a year -- or longer. He can only hope he found something anew. That he found the healer child and they are both safe.

He prays to Greagor this does not stain his memory. That this bout of selfishness in his prince is not unforgivable.

Claude's arms are a perfect weight on his shoulders. He leans into him, feels... supported. An impossible feeling as well, but Dion cannot lie and say he has not needed such support through his life. He would not have made it this far without Terence's support.

His smile is wistful.] I cannot afford to worry for the future. I should rather focus on the now. [The matters of what he deserves must be set aside. If he only receives what he deserves, then he should have nothing.] Which includes the night. I should like you to stay. I cannot accept to part from you now, with such revelations, at least until tomorrow.

[ There's something else in that smile on Dion's face, he's almost certain. Would like to think he's observed enough different ones by now to know the differences between some of them even as subtle as they might be, and when paired with the words which follow - feels like a key to something. Possibly just that none of them have any control of what is or isn't happening at home, or what was left behind, or even what might be ahead for them here. A combination, or perhaps none of them at all.

Dion is right, no matter what it is; as tempting as it is to let his mind wander down any number of paths, why not focus on the now? They're here together, and that is more than enough to set contemplation aside when there'll be time to learn more about it later. The smile Claude offers back in return is genuine and soft around the edges in even a way he's not entirely aware of for such a request and being drawn closer - as if his answer could ever be anything but yes. ]

I think we can arrange for more than a night whether it's this one or more to come. And for tonight, there's nowhere else I'd rather be.

[ Such words are meant to be capped off with a kiss, and that's just what he leans in for. It's entirely tempting to continue, but maybe in another moment when he has something else in mind first. Now it's just a matter of moving towards it which seems to take him a great deal more effort... which is to say, he either doesn't manage to peel himself away or it's at a pace which might very well be glacial for how slow it is. ]

I seem to remember spending many a time reading together once upon a time. [ Memories he holds dear out of those years, all those times in solitude together which stand out among what all he recalls and ones Claude treasures. Not ones which have happened in reality, however, though there's the chance for them now. ] What do you say we bring the wine with us to get comfortable? The dragon, too, since I wouldn't want to leave her out.

[More than a night. He nearly chokes to hear it. It -- the longer the seconds pass, the more impossibility presses in o him. They still hold so many secrets between the two of them. So many unknowns. And yet they were both so willing to move past that. To care despite it.

This kiss Dion is happy to sink into, lifting a hand to cup Claude's cheek, to lean his weight into his body. Dion may not be the dominant of Shiva, but glacial, for this moment, is a pace he can work with.

He still feels like he's in a whirlwind regardless.]

I would love nothing more. [And yet it is terribly hard to put any distance between them. To even stop kissing him. He's never had this freedom. To stand with a man he has fallen for and not dread the next moment he shall be pulled into war. This place has no power over him.] Oh, no, of course not. We cannot forget the dragon.

[She perks up at attention pulled to her, lifting from the bed with a stretch. No, it is only fair she should be here, too. When she is yet another thread between them.]

[ If it hadn't already been difficult enough to pull away as it was, Dion makes it even more so when each of those small touches put a pause in what even Claude can admit aren't his best attempts to exit a situation. Because why would he even want to here? Far better to grin against Dion's mouth when it seems he remembers the dragon after all. ]

If she's anything like... well, any wyvern I've ever known, she might've invited herself as it is.

[ One last kiss it is temporarily before he slowly unwinds himself from Dion's embrace now that there's another destination in mind.

In the name of comfort, or rather something far more comfortable, Claude removes all the warm gear meant to ward off Nocwich's chill - gloves, cloak, a scarf - and then tosses them onto one of the armchairs nearby rather haphazardly. Something he's done before a time or two (or several hundred). Much like those other times, there's no checking to see if they land or to fold any of it. Claude's too busy retrieving the book in question next and sitting on the edge of the bed to toe off one boot and then the other next.

One brief pause to scratch the dragon under her chin to further the invitation offered, and then there's nothing left to do but to scoot back to get comfortable and pat the empty space next to him with a smile offered to Dion. ]

C'mon, then. Time to get even more comfortable.

[Dion laughs, quiet, letting Claude slip out of his hands only because he knows that he has him in a way that is not merely physical. It is enough that he can watch him undress, to make himself comfortable in a place that Dion had carved out for himself.

He's allowing this. He's allowed this. Company. Tenderness. Things he never thought he should touch again... that he earned through trust alone.

Dion removes his outer jacket, until he is only dressed in a light, loose chemise that flutters around his chest. Only long enough to hide the stone of his skin underneath. One step at a time, he thinks. Dion is not focused on his curse tonight.

As many years as he spent curled up around Claude in the sun as Bahamut, as much ease as he found in it, it is clear the same ease does not come to him as a man. Not when his experience has been so... limited. He leaves his boots beside Claude's, removes his gloves -- hesitating only for a second -- to reveal the scales and claws that are his hands now.

It feels as if secrets may be all he has to share anymore. But he does wish for more. And it is this that has him lean his body against Claude's, to sink down until his head is in his lap. His dragon crawls between them, fitting herself in the space between Dion's chest and Claude's legs so she lays across both of them. The ease which Dion lacks appears to be contained entirely in his dragon.] The reality of this is even more blissful than those remembered dreams.

[ For his part Claude waits patiently as Dion moves towards the bed, watching what feels like deliberate decisions for each action with a small smile on his own face. Perhaps it's merely the formality he's come to know and finds endearing surfacing again in a squeeze in his chest somewhere around his heart as the other man settles onto his lap. He could tell himself as much, minimize it to just that, but even Claude's never been that good at lying to himself.

Easier to translate it for now to reaching to run a hand through Dion's hair first at the angle where it's fallen and then to brush it back with each gentle pass of his fingers through it. A gesture also meaningful while the dragon settles herself into place like the leosylphs do whenever he sits down in an armchair with a book almost just like this. ]

Lucky for you then we can also arrange for this to be more than once when our thoughts are the same on it being better.

[ But what Claude really means is lucky for him to be allowed this, lucky for them to be here. Something which verges a bit too close to honesty for him to voice despite everything else said through words and actions in this very room, and something to be saved.

The book rests against his chest with it momentarily intentionally placed aside in his thoughts. He'd meant it about reading, but first is reaching for one of Dion's now ungloved hands to again take it in his own with the other man's fingers resting in his palm. A quiet question without words before Claude curls his own fingers around scales and claws he doesn't remember from before though the answer doesn't so much matter as much as the hand in his and the man curled around him. ]

[Like a startled cat or the first touch of a newborn chocobo, Dion stiffens at the touch. This is not his norm. He was not allowed -- or, rather, did not allow himself -- more than small, brief moments of tenderness with Terence. Moments that were still hidden from prying eyes, that were in his tent on the battlefield or, more rarely, his room in the castle.

He was already target enough. He did not need to spread the danger to anyone else.

Another stiffening when Claude takes his hand, and this time he watches it happen, his eyes having slowly slipped closed from the touch. Of course he understands the sense that Claude does not care, but... Dion does. He has hated the change since it was forced on him.

Now Claude's fingers slip between his, unharried by the feeling of scales. Well. He does have extensive experience with wyverns. A distinct fondness of them. It is only that Dion has always had a firm separation of himself and of Bahamut. They were separate, they were one and the same. His body was his own, apart from the curse.]

A gift. [He tilts his head back to look up to Claude's face. He doesn't need to speak it to make it a question.] From the Singularity, so I've been told. A hint of what is to come.

[ Each reaction is carefully catalogued as he watches to make sure there's not discomfort too great there. Dion's eyes closing are a reassurance as Claude continues to gently run his fingers through the other man's hair in something hopefully soothing to make tension melt away.

Until it comes to hands where it's back again, and he waits patiently for what answer he'll receive. A succinct answer as it turns out, and one which requires no guessing about how Dion feels about it. ]

Maybe what's to come. [ A gentle correction when there's still so much unknown. He remembers Dion as a god well after all their time spent together in those centuries; maybe it's discomfort with that which weighs heavy here. This isn't the only change Claude's seen more as Sylvain also came back with something, and same for others still even before then. That's even before the things he'd done as a god that he'd rather forget in between better memories from then. ] Singularity or not, it changes nothing for me.

[ Which is what he can offer without going into more of those potential unknowns, much as he wants to offer more. Nothing which can be done about that now except gently squeeze the hand in his before lifting it to his lips to kiss the back of it for added reassurance, watching Dion all the while. ]

Maybe. [His repetition could offer some agreement, and it does, but most of Dion is far more pessimistic about his own future. He has already succumbed to the emotions that had taken him over as a god once before. What is to stop him from getting worse? For settling into such feelings?

Perhaps it is this. His memories of all those years (and there were far too many of them) have drifted into fog, and he can no longer recall if he had lifetimes with Claude, or if they met again after centuries apart. But he cannot believe that love for another could make a man worse. It is the very antithesis as to what Ultima believed.

Dion's heart feels weak. Even with the scales, he can feel the press of heat, of lips. Of adoration. It is that which seals the fact he will tell Claude all of his secrets. To ensure he is worthy of such receptions.] Thank you. [He lifts himself, tipping his head in for another kiss.] Then I am yours as long as such beliefs continue.

[ Maybe is something he can accept since it's enough for Dion to acknowledge it. He's under no illusions the other's answer changed even in that echo, but it's enough as he squeezes the hand still in his in response rather than reaching for any words. It's enough to watch Dion consider it even if he can't guess where those thoughts might be going, but that's the thing: there's time to learn them, and that's more than enough, too.

As Dion lifts Claude's already leaning down to meet him with his other hand going to the back of Dion's head to keep him there. If it's not the right time for words when there will be others, then instead he can put them into that kiss until it ends. And when it does he's not quick to pull away, instead holding Dion's gaze with a soft smile which only grows more so at what's said. ]

I could say the same.

[ Murmured quietly with fingers trailing through Dion's hair, and he means it. It would be easy to get distracted - as if he hasn't already when it's easy to linger here with more yet unsaid. Instead Claude presses one less kiss to the corner of the other man's mouth and leans back against the pillows behind him once more to pick up the temporarily forgotten book as they both settle in before he starts to read, Dion's hand still in his own all the while. ]

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[ OPEN ] the river's overrun

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sorry for the wait ;;;

no worries, you're all good!! <3

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wrap up around here? ♥

it's a wrap!