[ CATCH-ALL ] i'm allied to the winter

[wiedzminka]

Who: Ciri, Geralt, Rinwell, Jaskier, and others
What: Catch-all for February plans
Where: Cadens, the desert on the road to Aquila, Horizon
When: throughout February
Warnings: will add as needed. probably violence. spoilers for season 2 of the witcher!

Closed headers below, but open for plotting! Hit me up if you'd like a starter. Feel free to PM Ciri's journal or catch me on Plurk at belleteyn

Comments

[wiedzminka]

But--

[ She stops again, struggling to figure out what to say. And why. Does she want to protest because she thinks he's wrong? Or because she thinks he doesn't mean it? Because she isn't sure it's possible?

Simply because she's... afraid?

In a surge of desperation so shocking in its intensity it leaves her lightheaded, Ciri grabs a fistful of his tunic, gripping tight. Her heart pounds in her head, a tangle of thoughts trying to explode out of her at once, sharp shards of memories and hopes and fears all crashing against each other in a horrible din that won't let her fucking think.

She breathes in sharply, staring up at Geralt's steady eyes. ]

Do you really think it's possible?

[ Geralt has not lived through the parts of his future that brought her here. But he is here. And the way he and Jaskier (and Yennefer) had experienced memories they shouldn't have had yet still leaves her uneasy about it all.

At the same time though, he hadn't actually left. Maybe this is how it will be -- time fractured, having to catch up all at once due to some glitch in the Singularity's (or her) magic. They still don't know what caused it, and Geralt's theory that it's her makes an unfortunate amount of sense. She is the connecting factor. She is bridging their past and their future.

...as long as she is here, it's impossible that Geralt won't suffer the fate he has in her past. And yet, she still desperately wonders if she can protect him from it anyway. If things have already changed. If what he and Jaskier and Yennefer 'remembered' are only echoes.

Ciri leans forward, pressing her forehead to his chest. ]

Are you sure?

[gynvael]

[ She grabs him so abruptly, he doesn't think twice before his arm goes around her. Does he? He takes a moment to reply. This is not a decision to make lightly, and yet, he only feels relief at having made it. Because the thought of returning to the Continent is rife with so much fucking risk. What awaits her there, what has yet to come, if the Wild Hunt will come for her the moment she steps through a portal—

He's lost her before. Twice. Once, when he'd believed she couldn't possibly have survived Nilfgaard on her own. Then in the Horizon: a shadow of her that had felt nonetheless real. He woke up to the understanding that nothing changed, that she was likely lost back home. He can't do it again. He's lost too much already.

If they stay, there's a chance she can live a life where no one is hunting her down. On the Continent, that can't ever be possible. Not as long as kingdoms and entities exist who desire her powers, who know where and what she is. ]

Yes. [ His answer is firm. He knows he will talk to Jaskier. And...perhaps Yennefer. If—if. He doesn't know yet. Yennefer remains a complicated matter, as always. ] I'm sure.

[wiedzminka]

[ Ciri presses herself close in his embrace, still trying to figure out how she's feeling, to take control of her racing heart.

All this time, she'd been thinking -- maybe not actively, but somewhere in the back of her mind, ever-present -- that she needs to figure out a way to set things right. That their paths are all wrong and the jumbled mess that has become of the future and the past has to come untangled somehow. That she is the only one with the pieces and the power and that she must, eventually, send them on their way.

She would have to take Geralt somewhere far away once more, unsure if she would ever see him again.

It takes a long time for her to begin to wrap her head around what Geralt is saying instead. Agonizing seconds pass in silence, drawing out into a full minute that crawls by like years. The choice does not have to be hers alone. It does not have to be a choice at all.

There is a chance -- a real chance -- that they can stay like this instead. The decision is to simply... stop. Not to think about trying to get everyone home again, or how the time will right itself. Not to blame herself and wonder if she should have tried harder months ago, if there was some way to reawaken her powers, if she is the reason they're trapped. Not to feel guilty for being content with the life they've built in Cadens, feeling like it is a stolen moment, something that should not exist.

Geralt is right.

We can only move forward.

When Ciri imagines moving forward, all she's seen until now is a convoluted road into darkness, always something ahead, always something chasing behind. And somewhere, in the distance, a hope to see the people she loves again.

She had never imagined Abraxas. She had never imagined a cramped little loft apartment in a desert city worlds beyond any she'd ever seen. She'd never imagined Geralt only ever a thought away, every day. Drinking and swapping stories with Jaskier more evenings than not. Even Yennefer, a continent apart but still more within reach than she's been for far too long.

But Ciri had imagined -- hoped for -- a home. It is a home made of people, of fates bound together and trust kept. It is not a place. It hasn't been for years.

Even after all this time, Geralt's words have stayed with her, a closely-guarded talisman tucked inside her heart. His plea. His promise.

We are your family. It's not perfect, but it is real.

Just as real here as it would be on any other sphere.

Ciri's voice is muffled in Geralt's shirt, thick around the lump in her throat. ]

I have spent half my life... running. Hiding. Being afraid.

I--

[ She chokes. The fear might never go away, not fully. But no matter what happens now, she knows there is something to stand and fight for. Here. Together. ]

I do not want to run anymore.

[gynvael]

[ That's the other thing, too. That Ciri feels responsible for being the one to bring them back. And she shouldn't. That is not her job. It is not her burden, whatever her powers may be. Especially not when they haven't any clue what it might trigger: the Wild Hunt, innumerable gateways, the collapse of the Singularity itself. Ciri, in danger from the Singularity's intense power. Her magic has already been known to backfire over a simple healing spell. He doesn't want to imagine what might happen if she were to try something as powerful and complex as opening a portal into another realm.

Even if he were to want to go back, he would never use Ciri to get there. He would never allow anyone else to, either.

He wraps his arm tightly around her. His heart feels heavy and light all at once. He just. Wants to be with the people he cares about, to know that they are safe, to know that they aren't alone. He's not so naïve to believe that there will be no threats or darkness lurking. There's always risk, danger. He can't always be around to protect her. But it doesn't feel as if the entire world is out to have her, here. ]

Then we'll stay. [ He doesn't know yet, that she's been running alone. That at some point, he was taken from her. ] Together.