abraxaslogs | [open] Late September/Early October catchall

What do you think I have been doing when I've been in Libertas, Jaskier?

[Alucard reaches back for his wine glass, fingers dancing over stone and-- yes. There it is. He brings the drink forth effortlessly, but the way he cups his hands around the glass makes it seem as if he's treating it as a cup of tea for comfort, not a luxurious drink. Alucard never treats wine in such a way.]

The magic that built the Hall and lets it function has rhyming echoes for structural integrity and defense. I've been using that in rebuilding efforts, when I haven't been making blueprints for temporary housing. [The sip of wine is long. Tired.]

Both can be done. And I perhaps would like to be walking among more than death.

I don't ask. [His voice, when he responds, is softer. He doesn't ask not because he doesn't want to know, but because --

It's too much. If he was honest. If he allows himself that selfishness. He has not asked Nadine, nor Julie, nor Geralt. Nor Alucard. He both wants to know and does not want to know the details. He has only allowed himself to go as far as the Libertas kennels. When he returns home, it is back to Cadens. He does not linger in Libertas anymore.

It is strange to feel this distinct urge to suddenly escape. Since he broke down in front of Yennefer, he has only allowed himself to save face. To swallow it down.

Not because it's better. But because he is indulging in cowardice.]

Are you recreating its runes, then? [If that is the case, it may be something they could rope someone like Jayce into.] Far be it from me to forbid you to indulge. [There's little heat in the response. It is only an answer he finds, personally, a bit detached.] I do think it's an idea. There is no telling what Ellya's next move will be, but I thoroughly doubt this is the end of this conflict. The better prepared we are... well. The better.

[What a poet. Forgive him. He's rather lost a piece of his soul already.]

[Alucard has the grace to look properly embarrassed. Of course Jaskier wouldn't ask. Why should he? He's had to recover himself, and how much additional effort must it take to look at what is happening and not feel a burden of sorts? The dhampir's hands clamp down tighter around the wine glass, applying pressure that puts a crack in the glass. Hardly intentional, but it says everything.

He's gotten used to not feeling delicate over the past several months. The threat to return to the state makes every part of him hurt, even if the reasons are completely understandable.

Better to talk about the practical.]

Some of them. And there were others I came across in my research that have proven useful. It's such clever and practical magic, and there's-- [Hell, he's said as much to Ciri.] There's familiarity. The mechanisms that allowed my father's castle to move from place to place didn't operate on magic like this, but there are shared elements.

[He can at least redirect the conversation, if Jaskier's curiosity wins out. He hopes it will.] I'll...I don't know who I'll reach out to first. But I'll take care of it tomorrow.

[Jaskier hears the very distinct sound of cracking glass, but if he's honest, he's too tired to bring it up, either. Whatever he's done to set Alucard off, the dhamphir is still here, they are still relaxing, and Jaskier will forcibly create expert masseuses if he must to make sure they are relaxed.

Actually. Mm. That's an idea.

He smiles to himself, giving a nod. He's certainly let Alucard take on the bulk of the actual work, with construction, and reconstruction, and apparently rune study. Jaskier is there for the monetary side, and he has not failed to provide. (Well. Money, and occasionally showing up with Mog to encourage everyone.)] It's nice to see you so enthusiastic.

[That much is true. It's a rare gift to be given.] I don't exactly have a direct line to her, but Quilleth may be a reasonable goal, if she is not already swamped with work. [If she's still alive a voice at the back of his head provides.] And there are yet some empty rooms in Cadens still. We can start small if we must.

--Wait. [Alucard pauses, turning to face Jaskier. He just said something and the bard almost glossed over it? The dhampir blinks, tilting his head in one direction, then the other.] Did I just mention an entire castle that could change locations in a moment and you didn't even ask a second question about the concept?

[Now he's worried. Now he's very worried.] I'll ask Axn if he'd be willing to begin with. If he's not game, then there's no point to the rest.

Wait? [Jaskier blinks, too. Did he say something strange?

His mouth opens. "Oh." No, he didn't say something strange. Apparently the lack of saying something was the strange part. Jaskier tips his head back, sinking into the water until it reaches his chin, giving an amused little noise.] It may surprise you to hear I have learned new things during our time together, especially on how little detail you can give on most occasions. I suppose... I don't have the energy to pry right now.

[Or he's so tired he barely understood the words. Moving. Castle. A thing that would have sounded like the main ingredient of a fairy tale --]

Perhaps the soul shrivels when the body comes that close to death. [Alucard is making a good point, talking to Axn, and he adds his agreement with a nod -- but he's so caught up in the poetry of the moment, he continues on.] Or I'm beginning a slow, leisurely descent into a sort of madness. Which is a bit fun. I've heard a bit of madness can make one a better artist.

[No energy to pry. Alucard's total lack of a poker face shows here, and it's all worry. He doesn't reach out, because that feels like too many boundaries to be traversing in a day, but the noise he makes is worried and sympathetic. Because well. Been there.]

It withdraws for a time, out of a desire to protect itself. I can only speak from my own experiences on the matter, but...[He understands. Entirely.]

Sometimes, it's a path better walked alone. You can indulge in every feeling as it comes. Maybe it makes better art. Or maybe it just gives you something to try and outrun. That's all it ever did for me.

[He smiles in return, not only for the sound of sympathy (a sound he deeply understands), but for Alucard's words. They're poetic, and more importantly, they sound true. The soul withdraws.

Yes. Yes, that's how he feels. It is buried deep within him, waiting, as he merely survives. He has not even looked at his book of songwriting since he returned, and it is only now it even occurs to him. Art is not churning in his head at the moment. Lyrics do not dance between his ears.

But at least this time, Jaskier feels he can accept it. Not as if the muses are leaving him, but they understand how the soul can wither. That he is being given.... a vacation.

Of sorts.]

I am very terrible at running when it counts. Geralt can tell you. Well -- I can run quite fast, when death is involved, without tripping. I may be underselling myself a bit. [He laughs, and though it's quiet, it is pure. Not even sarcastic. A start!] No, no. You're right. You're perfectly right. I feel a bit of an epitome on the tip of my tongue. That my soul needs this... time to withdraw. So I can.... process. [Which is certainly something to say when he pokes at its deeper meaning. "I'm learning coping mechanisms to survive oncoming trauma." Whew. War really does a number on a man, doesn't it?]

Well. Since you brought it up. Are you going to elaborate on your moving castle? Are you going to end up inventing a cave that can... I don't know, bury itself under ground and pop up elsewhere? That would be fun, too.

It's not linear. [Processing, he means. That's the only way Alucard can describe what it felt like, being alone in the castle. Oppressed by death and memory on all sides.] And there's no other comforting words I have. Just that it is, and recognizing it helps in centering oneself. I did not have that outside perspective.

[Because Alucard is a sad idiot who lives alone. He'll leave it there, unless Jaskier wishes to return to the subject.]

I'd like that for the cave, but it may be a little bit down the road due to other obligations. [Viktor, mostly.

It is easier to show. Alucard holds his palm out flat, imagining the castle emerging from the steam of the spring. Slowly, and then all it once, the steam solidifies into the wild shape of home. Darkens, becomes a perfect scale replica of the castle, all jutting turrets and impossible architecture. If there was ever any question about where Alucard's interest in building and architecture came from, well.]

This is it. My father built it over the centuries.

[No, it isn't. And Jaskier may have spent more time in the world than Alucard, but he has spent far less time on... personal traumas. He has never been far from death on the Continent, or the muck and slime and every being that lives in them. But he made himself a figure that was not involved in political machinations. Not the way he is here.

Only seems fair that he should have to learn new things in this new world of theirs.]

Ah. The Hall. [Is Jaskier's assumption. Or the previously mentioned art protections. Well, at least Alucard has his priorities --

Wait. Does that mean a movable cave could be possible? With enough time?

Jaskier closes the distance between them after he plucks up his (full) wine glass again, the water ebbing as he peers down at the castle. Oh. Oh, it's a wicked, sharp thing, but he can see the beauty in it. The image of a moon framed behind it.]

It truly is beautiful. Though not what I would call inviting, exactly. A bit too pointy for all that. [Jaskier places a floating moon just behind the castle, glowing along all those ridges in this small, perfect recreation.] I was expecting it to be on little chicken legs, actually. We have some fables about such a thing.

[And not-so-much fables where that -- that demon comes in. Jaskier doesn't even want to think her name right now.]

It's still in progress.

[There's a gentle shrug. No one is rushing him along at the moment, and the needs of Libertas are much greater. When this is over, there can be music. For now, he has a useful skillset, and it is wiser and kinder to use it on behalf of others.

Alucard wills the little model to spin, and spin it does. Slow. Certain. Showing off all the little flourishes Dracula placed into the thing, meant to scare and to protect in equal measure.]

Of course it isn't. It's meant to scare people off. If not that, the staircases and impossible architecture wear one out before they even approach the residents. Or, if there's a vampire hunter at the door, one moves the structure entirely.

[That last one was important. But...chicken legs?]

I've only heard a few stories from neighbors further north. Interesting that that crosses universes.

[Jaskier huffs in amusement.] I believe I can easily imagine the sort of man who creates a spectacle that he intends to keep people away. It's a nearly enviable type of arrogance. Or he simply did not understand humanity in the least.

[A cloud of what may be bats flies past the moon and around the castle -- another little touch by Jaskier because he finds it all very fitting. Alucard obviously inherited the ability from somewhere.]

Seeing this, it makes me like your mother all the more.

[He has not forgotten how Alucard told him his mother marched up to this to obtain knowledge to help her fellow people. Anyone who would approach such a monstrosity with such headstrong determination is... well. That's truly enviable.

Jaskier holds his hand out in turn, fingers uncurling to show a hut walking to nowhere, bearing long, crooked bird-like legs.] I dare not speak her name even here, but -- I have a friend who has encountered her in the flesh. So it is not just idle stories. I would not be surprised to find such creatures are capable of such a thing... though, to be fair, it is said that only unicorns are still able to cross to other spheres.

You will not be shocked to learn that you're correct on both accounts. [Dracula? Arrogant? Of course. Out of touch and unwilling to deal with humanity? His calling card, after a while.

The florish of bats puts a faint smile on the dhampir's lips, and it's lovely that Jaskier remembers little details. They're almost always the ones that matter most.] You'd had loved her. She balanced kindness without standing for any nonsense, and was always quick to berate that nonsense when it arose. You know she told my father off within two minutes of entering the castle? She was disappointed at his lack of hospitality.

[Alucard was raised with that particular point in mind. It's still funny, even if it leads to painful recollections.]

Understandably so. I won't offer the name I know the story as, just in case. I can't recall what our world's stance on unicorns is.

[No, he's not entirely. It's not exactly arrogance that has him feeling that way (though he is normally always correct, of course); it's that over the years, Jaskier has acquired a very high level of skill at understanding others. It's how he reads a crowd, after all.

Or the history of a man's parentage.]

I absolutely would have loved her. As you know well, I often get along with those who are no-nonsense.

[Because Jaskier absolutely recognizes how much nonsense he himself can create.

Jaskier cruses the hut in his hand, leaning back against the rocks once more. He swallows several gulps of wine.] No, I appreciate your just in case as real caution. There is power in a name like that. [He smiles, though. Unicorns are not exactly benevolent in some cases, but...] What? You don't have unicorns?

And she would have absolutely indulged you.

[Jaskier has a good heart, after all. Few things made his mother as happy as seeing that. Alucard is confident that it would have been friendship almost immediately, with the occasional spat of good natured bickering.

There is, for a moment, the thought that some place might summon her here. Alucard stiffens at that realization, but it is easy to shake.]

This is what I'm saying, I'm not sure. I've seen items cataloged at unicorn horns, but I've not been able to determine if they're genuine or not. Could be from another horned animal, or it might be genuine. As I've not met one myself, the matter could go either way.

And indulged in me making fun of you, I hope.

[What's the point of befriending a man's mother if he can't use the opportunity to pick at them? (Not to bring up that Jaskier has definitely befriended mothers for other reasons but, of course, for one, he would not risk cucking Dracula, of all people. It seems like a very ill-advised idea.

He does not even bring that thought up.)]

I suppose I have never met a unicorn myself... though I rather convinced myself I've seen one. However, at the time, I was slightly inebriated from a rather heady mixture of wine and herbs, so...

[Look. Things happen at university.]

Oh, doubtlessly. You, her, and Sypha in a room is a worst case scenario for such a concept.

[He can't even imagine what would come of that, besides chaos and blows to his ego. But his mother would enjoy Jaskier for the wit, if not shut the flirting down immediately because well.

Jaskier doesn't need to know exactly how into each other his parents were.]

So you don't know if they're real either. You were drunk.

[He throws his head back and laughs. And yes, it's a bit touched with drink. That's the point of this. And if he lets the drink settle, he can dissuade his mind from lingering on terrible, inconvenient things. He's certainly set on doing so. Except he says into the quiet:] Ah, Sypha. I miss her.

[He knows Alucard must, too.

Hector, not so much. All of these people he's so found of from a sphere he will never visit. He drinks, swirling after merely for something to do with his hands. It's a funny thing, isn't it?]

No, I'm quite sure they are. We're taught about them in university, you know; I mean, as much as one truly learns about the beasties of the world beyond "you must never attempt to encounter a single one of them, because they will all likely kill you." I never met a vampire on the Continent, but I never doubted their existence. I believe it is more rational to believe in the impossible than to be perplexed when one finally encounters it.

[Alucard is now well-acquainted with Jaskier's attempts at philosophy when the wine truly hits.]

[To that, Alucard can only nod. He's not discussed her departure, nor does he see any reason to do so with others. She was here, they repaired things and made progress, and doubtlessly there is more to do in Wallachia. She is better equipped for it than he is. That's the simple truth of it all, and he while he might be upset, it is not the worst thing that has happened in his life by far.

He huffs, taking the point. How dare vampires be the example though???]

Fine, fine. They're real in your world. Does the lore about having to be a virgin to see one exist in your world? Because that could explain why you've never seen one.

[Alucard, did you really just do that???]

[They're always relevant when one's closest friend is a vampire!]

Actually, it does! Of course, I believe only old wives believe such a thing. There are surely elves that have seen unicorns, I should suspect, since they're both old beings. [Of course this is all speculation, but it's what Jaskier believes. Or what he'd like to.

It makes for good stories.]

I -- [He'd simply gone on with it without having every word hit his mind.] That's an incredibly silly joke when you know, very well, how far from a virgin I am.

[Well, not personally, but Alucard has certainly had chances otherwise to find out. Despite it, Jaskier snorts, flicking water in the dhampir's face.] You're drunk.

[Alucard offers a sideways grin once Jaskier realizes what, exactly, the dhampir has said this. It took him long enough, and frankly the reaction is worth it. He leans back, water sloshing as he uses his arms to brace himself against the side of the springs.]

Only in our shared imagination. But yes. And it's good wine, so why not indulge?

[It's one of those moments where Alucard is actually unclenched and acting like an actual person, rather than the stick up his ass dhampir scion he always puts on as. The break is nice, and he wouldn't do this in just anyone's company. Jaskier has earned it and then some. He's probably the only person who has.]

[open] Late September/Early October catchall

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