abraxaslogs | [ OPEN ] split tomorrow from today

Entry tags:

[ OPEN ] split tomorrow from today

Who: Claude and various
When: November + December
Where: Nocwich, Cadens, TBA
What: Catch all for both months
Warnings: None currently, will add/mark as needed

( Open and closed starters in the comments! Also good with prose or brackets and please feel free to wildcard into the open prompts with something else. If you'd prefer plotting first, you can find me at

indech, arboria#1862, or by PM at any time! )

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That Jesper says nothing at first - it's not reassuring. All the more reason Claude keeps his gaze trained on him while they stand in place and with something tensed internally in him somewhere like a bowstring stretched too far. Something somewhere between apprehension and anticipation covering a spectrum of reasons, but the most of all because Claude's aware, he thinks, of all of the implications to this.

When Jesper abruptly walks the other direction his quick reflexes keep him in step or a couple steps behind for both that and the turns down different streets following. He says nothing, not wanting to draw any attention to them, and just walks until they stop somewhere considerably more secluded. Somewhere that would've been a better place to start the conversation, really. Though he's remained expressionless so far, a frown immediately crosses his face at what's said.

"You didn't do anything wrong here. If you hadn't helped, we wouldn't have made it to Solvunn in time. We would've had to turn around and come back empty-handed." Something that's potentially not a comfort now in the face of this, but he crosses his arms lightly over his chest in thought while studying the street outside the alleyway. "Just because they asked how we created the bridge doesn't mean they know anything either. And it definitely doesn't mean that they know anything more than we lashed a bunch of trees together to create the bridge as long as we all say the same thing. If it's not saying the same thing to the same questions, then we lie if they ask something else."

That's not all of it, however, as he levels his gaze on Jesper next. "None of us are going to let them drag you into something you don't want to do or be a part of, Jesper."

"If any of those guards were perceptive enough to look at the bridge, they would probably know it was not a bunch of trees lashed together. I would've done a better job not making it so obvious, but it was too hard to have details. I'm not good enough at it yet."

It wouldn't look like a perfect road or anything, there was definitely a lot of wood and earth mixed up, but anyone with a brain in their heads would see that it looked strange. His abilities mixed all of it together into one. Professional Durasts, people who have done it for years, probably would have been able to do it without problems. But he's never been trained. This is all amateurish.

Jesper at this point in time wouldn't do anything differently, the supplies were necessary and he promised to get them, but he may feel differently in a few weeks. It has been a shitty month to say the least. He'll have to talk to Kaz. They do have a bunch of exits planned if need be. It might sound irrational to go straight to fleeing, but it's more to soothe his own fears. He has the look of someone being hunted, whether or not that's true.

"If all they think I can do is a few tricks, it could be worse. They just can't know what I can actually do." Meaning the ravine wasn't even the thing that would probably interest a military. Certainly there are things about that side of his powers that would be very interesting or useful, but that is not what gets Fabrikators stuck in the army or caught by powerful people.

"I'm not going to let any of you get in between, Claude. Who knows what they would use to get us to fall in line, given the chance." Such as a young, popular Summoned to instigate others into a situation they don't want. Jesper won't allow that.

There's no sense in arguing with that it not looking like the bridges around here so Claude says nothing in response to that, instead studying Jesper carefully. The cornered expression is noted and it's one that resonates with him far too much. It's hard to not think of his own experiences in life. There's an attempt to be objective here but it's unsuccessful when Claude's frown grows the longer he's silent while thinking this over, and the silence stretches on for a decent amount of time before he breaks it.

"Listen, I'm not going to pretend like I understand your history all because you've told me a few things about it here and there. I know that's never true for anyone including myself, but listen carefully when I tell you experience taught me this. There was a time in my life - or more like for most of it - that I felt I had to take on everything by myself. I didn't have friends, not really, and I kept others away because I thought it'd be better to stay uninvolved with anyone and to leave them at a distance to make what I wanted to do easier. And it did in a lot of ways, especially when I thought all I had to worry about was myself.

"But then everything changed, and the problem with that is this: even though I didn't want to acknowledge there were people on my side? They were still there anyway and just waiting for me to recognize it myself. People don't stop having your back just because you want them to, and friends won't leave you behind, either."

The frown on his face softens slightly since, well, point made and all - but Claude hasn't looked away from Jesper to make sure all of that sinks in, or at least sinks in enough for later if it's not enough now. "If they're going to threaten us then they're going to do it whenever they feel like it. They could at any time and no matter what the threat is that's not a good enough reason to abandon each other. I'm sure I'm not the only one who feels that way."

"No, you can't understand." Jesper is rarely sharp with people, but he is now, and he doesn't mean to be a prick about it, but he's tense at the moment. "Where I'm from, being born a Grisha means four things can happen to you. You die, either by using your powers, like my mother, or you're murdered by the Fjerdans, an entire country hunting us down. There are plenty of people willing to sell you to them for a nice price too." It's a product of being in this place that he can talk about his abilities and about his mother, who was a subject of silence for a long time.

"Or you get taken to the Ravkan army, where you have no choice but to fight for people, some who wouldn't mind joining in the mass slaughter due to sheer prejudice, but have been convinced we're worth keeping alive to be fodder." The thing is that Nina loves Ravka, he knows that because she's argued with him about this before, and she wasn't terribly happy about him hiding his abilities from her. But he would assume anyone raised to be a proud and loyal soldier would feel that way.

"Or you get used for your abilities, sometimes by being captured, sometimes by willingly selling it but with always the threat hanging over of the rest. Or you hide, like I did, which is difficult because not using them makes you sick, not always in obvious ways." Like his addictions and some of his other mental issues, since his health was high but the damage was done elsewhere. He explains all of this very flatly and directly, laying out a lifetime of fear and avoidance that frames being a loose Grisha.

"That has been my life. Maybe they aren't the same here, I don't know, I could be being unfair, but I'm not going to use the people I care about, like you, to become my armor. If the answer is to sell them, I'll do it. Then ... everyone will be alright." Maybe not him, but that's fine, it's not like he hasn't compromised before in his life. He's all for the best case scenario.

The tone is beyond justified and Claude just appears as unruffled as he usually is when what he's said is countered. He listens again with a deliberately neutral look on his face, not due to a lack of thoughts or feelings (or without something between sympathy and empathy with what this brings to light) but because Jesper's explanations are more important here. There's history Claude couldn't have ever inferred from what he was told before, and so all of it is deemed paramount now. More context, more background: all of it working to shape a further level of understanding on his end.

"You're right, there's much about that I wouldn't understand beyond the surface of what you're telling me." First things first and in order of importance in his mind - to make sure Jesper understands none of that is up for debate. "That's all rather different from what I know, and having lived under all of that has to make this an extra level of terrible.

"If I can speak out of turn again," with a smile on the apologetic side, since it's rather apparent what he'd said before was as much as it's going to be this time, too, "what if the officials don't know about your abilities? Even if they know something is different about the bridge, it doesn't mean they've pinpointed it to you specifically as of right now. And if that's the case, we certainly don't want to volunteer that information to them if we treat the Free Cities as the enemy, as we should be doing. And I still won't be volunteering it either regardless of anything. If they decide to ask me in again my answers to them won't change."

All of this is walking a fine line to keep it as the well-intentioned advice it's meant to be and Claude's all too aware of that. It's part of the reason why he moves to lean back against the wall himself off to Jesper's side, careful to leave the other with an ample amount of personal space for whatever he needs. "As someone who's created plans upon plans with contingencies for each and every one of them, that plan I think of first when starting? I've found it's rarely the right one. But in the end, the only person whose opinion actually matters on that is your own. Just know you aren't alone for any of it, no matter what you choose."

Jesper doesn't really come out with this information right away, he likes to be the carefree roguish type who never seems like he's worried or at risk for anything. He showed off his abilities on the supply run on purpose and the telekinesis probably would've been fine, even if the level of which he showed with his blades was up there, but it's not that unusual magic. But of course he went too far, he got cocky. He hasn't been living with the fear.

"If it's not me, it's Ciri. They know someone did something suspicious that day, and I'll be damned if I let anything I did fall on her head. It's important they don't know about her teleporting, I don't know why, but it is." Jesper just knows that she was hesitant about it the way he was, which means there are reasons she doesn't need to share about why that is a secret to her. Jesper is a very simple guy when it comes down to it. His loyalty to others always matters more to him than himself. "If it's one of us, it has to be me. It was me." And maybe he can divert them if they look at her.

Jesper is actually a fantastic liar, and most of the time he would have faith in his ability to shrug things off or joke about it until everyone was at ease. But this is likely to make him tense. His mind is going over a variety of options. He has to talk with Kaz and Inej. There may be a smart way to do this.

"Magic isn't illegal here. The only suspicious thing is that we hid it." And both he and Ciri had their reasons for doing that. What if he just admits to it? Explains why he'd want to hide it, it's not like the Summoned aren't somewhat known in their existence. The point is if those are the only abilities they know, it's not that dangerous. "Thank you for giving me a head's up and covering for it, but this is my mess. And maybe they pay well, who knows." He could use the money, after spending all of theirs.

There's a look on Claude's face - briefly - which very much implies it's imperative officials don't know about Ciri's or Jesper's abilities, but this time? He chooses to let that pass without comment.

For a few seconds, anyway.

"They don't need to know anything about any of us if we can avoid it. There's no telling what they know about us already since there has to be reasons they have in mind for why they wanted to call us here at all, let alone know we exist in the first place. But if they knew about our full histories, I also have to doubt they would've never let me leave that outpost where we were brought in. I would've had no choice but to sign up to the military for whatever they wanted me to do."

That could still very much be a want since tied to all of this is a slight shattering of that illusion of them having the ability to do whatever they want. It's still there, certainly, and Claude's never quite believed they weren't being watched carefully. This certainly proves that suspicion beyond all doubt and it's yet to unfold fully.

A topic for another time since there's plenty about the situation he finds suspicious from the Free Cities' actions even if Jesper's right that hiding it doesn't exactly work in their favor. Far easier to smile slightly again at the gratitude, even though: "No thanks necessary for that. I'm not one to let my friends flounder or feel they have to handle things on their own as you're finding out. Whatever you need me for in handling this, count me in."

"No, they don't know anything about us. That's a lie from the start." Jesper sounds completely confident of that, and he is. Pure logic, same as what Claude said. If they knew what everyone could do, if they knew who they were before, this entire thing would look very different. If they could control who they brought, they'd be picking the right soldiers. Jesper is convinced it's a completely randomized spell of some kind and they don't know a thing about them, except perhaps their name. The arcana is magically assigned to them.

"They're watching us but they haven't used us yet, it's baffling. We literally have people who can lift a bloody tank, and no one's come around forcibly conscripting. It makes no sense." And if they use Jesper to get into that, it's a concern, but in general he has been paranoid about this for a long time. They could try much more to get them to work for them, but they don't. He's used to powerful groups having a clear nefarious intention.

That honestly adds to all this fear because it means there is no clear answer. What they want, what they'll do. No one knows because they have yet to flex any muscle whatsoever. It is going to make him crazy until something finally makes sense, even if it's villainous, especially if it is.

"I'm the same way, but not good at accepting it, as I'm sure you've figured out." Jesper likes being the loyal one but he squirms at being the one that needs the protecting. It's not his role in the gang. He's the gun Kaz points and pulls the trigger. "I'll talk to the boss, we'll make a plan." He pauses. "Kaz, I mean. He's quiet so not a lot of people know he's around." Always scheming though. And Jesper's around him a lot, until recently.

"No, none of it makes sense." That much he can agree with, considering Claude remains convinced the powers that be do know something about them through conversations he's had with others who've been here far longer than he has. Some of that also includes what Jesper's said in their own various talks, and all of it has been fitting together into the puzzle in his mind of what's happening. Or what he thinks is happening, at least, and it's not something he feels particularly inclined to argue with anyone. In the end, they're all being kept in the dark for reasons they likely don't want to actually know.

Far easier to latch onto one tangent after another to get further away - somewhat - from the Free Cities' plans for them. There's another smile that crosses Claude's face though he somewhat hides it behind casually scratching his chin like he's in thought. "Well, that makes something else we have in common when it comes to not being good at accepting it. I meant it about it taking me a while to let people in."

That part's still a work in progress and one he'd rather not continue talking about since if he and Jesper really share that, Claude's guessing neither one of them want to hash it out in detail. There's the mention of a name following a boss and that gets his attention, though neither are things he can place about Jesper right then while thinking it over so there's a slight shake of his head. "I'm sure I've seen him around though I'm not sure if we've talked. Or if we have then it was only in passing, though that's been true for many people lately. He's someone you're close to from home, then?"

"I've been here eleven months just waiting for them to show their cards. I thought when the war began they would." It is extremely annoying to be sitting here all this time, paranoid and suspicious, with them technically doing nothing to make his fear justified. At least if they did, they all would finally know what the deal is. This unknown quantity is frustrating. Jesper likes knowing the motives of his enemies, and he does still see them as that.

"Oh. Yes. My closest friends didn't know I was a Grisha. Only Kaz." Jesper kept that very close to the vest with the people he loves, he can be very cagey about it. He started to be more open about his abilities here, and look at where that's probably led him. Besides, he has a reason he likes to be seen as the fun and cheerful guy who never seems worried. It's a good front that doesn't encourage deeper questions.

The fact he said only Kaz knew probably says a lot about where his trust lay from the start. Although he never really told him, he already knew, and he had Jesper do some things for him. "He's the leader of the gang Inej and I are in. The three of us are a unit." There are more Dregs, and Wylan and Nina exist, but it really is the three of them at the core. Kaz and his two hands, the dagger and the gun.

"He's ... I'm not going to say shy, but he has a hard time connecting with people. It's put him at a disadvantage here, and made starting over difficult." Jesper and Inej have a much easier time making friends and allies, which has always been true. But Kaz was always the leader, so in Ketterdam, he was in control. He hasn't been adapting the way he wants to. "He is one of the most loyal people you'll ever meet, but he is also cold and difficult." And Jesper is madly in love with him, naturally.

"You and me both," Claude says in regards to things being pushed into motion when the attacks started, though this is mostly muttered under his breath. Probably no need to outright state something they've agreed upon several times over, and while he doesn't (and can't) share Jesper's specific kind of anxiety of what it could mean for the other personally, there's still plenty Claude wouldn't wish to put at a stake between all of them here. The lack of anything from the Free Cities is unnerving.

That's less interesting to him for time being than hearing more about Kaz, and there's a slight eyebrow raise from Claude at the man in question being the only one who knew Jesper was a Grisha. Such a statement puts into clear focus how much trust Jesper puts into Kaz based on what Claude now knows, and he nods slightly at the mention of being a unit. Also an easy sentiment to understand, and the loss of such a thing he's been feeling since arriving and finding no familiar faces. Even now though the Singularity saw fit to bring others from Fodlan here, there's still specific ones he's missing.

"I can certainly relate to that, from the perspective of starting over after being away from those you've come to trust. Maybe a little less the cold part, though." With a grin for good measure, mostly because Claude's one to joke before things stretch on for far too serious for too long, and this conversation's certainly qualified as much. But he's also not trying to insult 1) someone he doesn't know and 2) someone important to Jesper, and there's something else to add in there.

"I remember Inej telling me a bit about him, now that I think about it, but she only called him her boss. I'd mentioned at the time if he was looking for something to do with the merchants I'd be happy to see what I could do there. It doesn't exactly take away any growing pains of the starting over part, but that offer still stands if you'd like to extend it to him as well."

Wouldn't it just be wild if they live there for years and no one ever says anything to them? It's definitely improbable, but some Summoned have been in this world for a year and a half. Some things have happened to them in that time, but nothing major since coming to the other factions. Jesper wishes he was someone who could simply shrug and go about his life not waiting for the hangman's noose, but he isn't.

"Cold is not a word I would use for you, no." He is friendly the way Jesper is friendly, much of the time. But he can see the wheels in his head turning too, the way that Kaz has. In that they may have some things very much in common, with a major difference being how to put themselves out into the world. "Where we're from, playing nice isn't an option if you want to live with power." Even Jesper with all his warmth and playfulness can be downright cold when he has to be. It would surprise people how cold he can be. "Kaz created a carefully curated persona back home."

As a gang leader, especially a young one, he had to make himself different and powerful and unique. Being cold as ice was one way to do that. Everyone feared him, and if they didn't, they learned to. He had to be that way, for a lot of reasons. "He's working on trying something new here." Or rather, letting go of Dirtyhands. It's impossible to duplicate what they had in Ketterdam.

"I would recommend, if you see him, approaching him yourself. He likes to deal with people directly." Also someone as friendly as Claude may actually get him to say more than a few sentences. It's possible. "I'm going to head back. Thank you, Claude. For covering and letting me know." If he'd been blindsided, he would be absolutely fucked.

A carefully curated persona rings all too true in Claude's ears and in a way that makes him feel slightly Perceived. Even if it's Kaz Jesper's talking about and not him specifically, and even if Claude's persona is still him within it from start to finish. It just comes with several layers of deliberately crafted walls and veneers layered over top to keep some distance and to make it easier to pivot when needed.

That doesn't match up with what he's inferring from Jesper's descriptions of his friend in the end; it's far more likely they were operating on different levels of cutthroat though he's familiar with that too. Whether and how exactly it's something that also differs remains to be seen, but based on what Jesper tells him? He's certainly going to have to keep a better eye out for Kaz to see about chatting sometime. Consider him intrigued enough for directness himself or rather, his own brand of it which may or may not be successful in the end.

Still, he pushes himself off the wall where he's been leaning with a nod. Best to not linger for too long where they are lest guards walk by and raise their own questions. "Of course, Jesper. And I meant what I said: you can always count on me for that in the future."

One last easy smile, and then it's off to finish that courier route.

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[ OPEN ] split tomorrow from today

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Maybe wrap on yours!

it's a wrap!