abraxaslogs | We Can't Wait For Progress

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We Can't Wait For Progress

WHO: Jayce Talis and you
WHAT: A variety of moments in the life of Jayce!
WHERE: Cadens and the Horizon
WHEN: All of August, will add more prompts later on in the month

Starters Below!

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Rio is an excellent assistant in the Horizon, always happy to greet people and lead them to one of her human companions. She is friendly and a little slobbery if people aren't careful. He lost the ability to tell when people were there during the nightmare experience, but he is relieved to feel the difference now. It helps that Rio rarely disappears from his side when he's in there unless someone else has popped up to intrigue her. Viktor dreamed her up but just like this space, they share her now.

"If only. The worst that would do is give Viktor a reason to throw a piece of rolled up paper at me." Jayce and Viktor have worked together so long that they have gone through some truly terrible ideas on top of their brilliant ones. Has Jayce put something upside down or missed a really, really obvious solution? Yep. It didn't help they would go days without sleeping while in the groove of a project.

"We're trying to figure out better mining equipment for Free Cities, they have bad conditions, but the real problem is how to make something that will actually work there, and will not be costly, they won't fund it otherwise." Jayce has thought of ideas that would work, but without his access to Hextech crystals or Council funds, much of them simply aren't possible.

It's always interesting to walk through other people's spaces, see what they've done with the malleable reality of Horizon. Kell realized not that long time ago, looking at his own domain, that he took his old habit of cobbling together disparate pieces of faraway places into something of his own with him. Though this time, it's not impractical trinkets that he drags to his hideout, but images, impressions, colours, elements of scenery. Looking at Jayce's lab now, he recognizes where he had stolen the height of his workshop from. The feeling of it being both cosy and spacious.

He leans against a paper-strewn table looking at the drawings that he understands nothing from, no matter his willingness to help.

"Can't say I know anything about mining. We probably had spells for that back home, but I guess that hardly a solution here."

As little as he liked to admit, there are many more mundane things that living in a royal palace has shielded him from. He finds his gaps in his knowledge in the most unexpected places.

Jayce and Viktor did overall just fill their domain with familiar and useful places from their home, although Jayce's recreation of his blown-up apartment was a happy fix for him. Their domain was dreamed up by two separate minds and solidified as one, there is something very firm and alive about it. Rio runs over to her bed next to Viktor's chair, settling in and watching Kell with big liquid eyes.

"Free Cities doesn't like straight-up magic, they do have access to New Magic, but they wouldn't use anything like that for something so mundane." New Magic is essentially Hextech but they do not have any access to the crystals that could make it work. He supposes they could ask, if a plan is put into motion approved of, but it's unlikely.

"Mundane being their choice of words, not mine." Jayce is serious about his commitment to workers and if they can accomplish something for them, maybe it will assuage some of his guilt about never being able to do it back home. "We're going to put together a science salon, see if we can meet other inventors and pick brains for a few projects."

Not to mention, it's always good to meet people like-minded. Jayce and Viktor were usually the smartest people in a room trying to dumb it down for others. Having a group of that type would be envigorating.

"How are you, Kell? It's nice to see you."

"Makes me wonder why they are so stingy with it, but honestly, I know very little about New Magic."

It is frowned upon in the academic circles. Deemed unsafe and unstable. Kell can't agree fully on principle, but the unstable part is enough reason for worry. Even if not using, or studying it, at all sounds like an exaggeration of caution.

"Sounds like a good plan. Someone might already have come up with a solution, or at least a part it. I just hope it won't devolve into a meeting of a bunch of people yelling at each other whose idea is obviously superior."

There you have him, idealistic and supportive. If Jayce ever needed someone to poke holes in a project idea for him, Kell is this person. He doesn't necessarily believe people are unable to cooperate. He's just seen mages discussing their pet projects with venom usually reserved for war declarations, and they were academics, so should be serious people. He has a hunch that inventors are just mages of technology, so same danger applies.

"Not that lousy, but would be a lot nicer to finally meet in person."

"Heimerdinger, you remember him, didn't want us to put Hextech in the hands of an average citizen without safeguards in place. While he was wrong in other ways, he might not have been there." Kell saw that their mentor was cold and short-sighted, leading to the conflict that broke their relationship up. But with some experience, Jayce looks at it slightly differently. He wasn't wrong about Heimerdinger's flaws and how his inaction caused the strife they were dealing with. But after seeing what Jinx did with his Hextech, he can see that safeguards on something that powerful are necessary.

"But then it comes down to who is making these decisions for people, and if they can be trusted or if they're only interested in keeping the power for themselves. Which I don't know." Jayce thinks it is probably the latter, otherwise they would have been using their New Magic to help people instead of hoarding it. Though there are New Magic items everywhere, packaged safely, he can see how an authoritative government would prefer holding the cards. Just because he's happy in Cadens doesn't mean he is blind.

"To be fair, if you get a lot of geniuses in a room, that is probably very likely. I already know one who likes to talk about his superior technology and knowledge. In a bragging way, not in a 'you're lesser' way." It is a distinct difference, because if Tony was looking down his nose at them, Jayce wouldn't tolerate his nonsense for long. The man may have an ego but he likes brilliance in other people. He just likes to toot his own horn. Endlessly.

"It's fine, Viktor will keep them in line." Not Jayce. Viktor is much more authoritative when he wants to get things done. Jayce is a people pleaser.

He nods at that last part. He has a lot of Horizon friends, but it would be great to meet them in person. "I heard it happened a few months before we got here, a peace summit, and that was the last time everyone was able to meet. I'm not sure if we'll get that chance, although if we do, I might ask you to bring some Thorne books. Our magic info is not as good."

"Sometimes, it is necessary to keep dangerous things out of reach of people unprepared to handle them."

Things like magic, like experimental untested technology, even weapons. It's naive to assume those things will only ever be used for good causes.

"Magic can create many wonders, but it can kill and maim as well. But so can a knife, if to less extent, and yet you do not deprive people of cutlery at meals..." Kell pauses with a smirk. "Unless, you're organizing a state dinner for people who hate each other. Then, it might actually be a good idea."

Kell has many objections to how his adopted father treated him personally, but Maxim was a good king. He remembers that Jayce didn't have similar experience with the rulers of his city.

"I am not in the slightest surprised. I bet he doesn't even have to raise his voice for that."

Not that Jayce couldn't herd the bunch of unruly geniuses. He is charismatic enough to make people pay attention. There's something about Victor, though, that makes people shut up and listen. Kell doesn't know the other inventor that well, but that was always his impression.

"Sure, what are you looking for?"

There's not even a sliver of hesitation. Kell doesn't care if Thorne authorities would frown at sharing knowledge with other faction's Summoned. He wouldn't care even if they did, or if it was illegal - which, to his knowledge, is not - he'd just be more careful if that was the case.

"It's definitely a very careful line to walk. The problem with Hextech is that there isn't much of a middle ground, which New Magic has a little more of. We hadn't found a way to downplay the crystals' power, it was always at the extreme." Meaning that Hextech crystals were always powerful, always over the top. If they had managed to find a way to perhaps take slivers or smaller parts of their power, so it was manageable and not extremely dangerous, that might have been the right way to go. And he sees that in how Free Cities handles it.

"The conflict going on in the city before I came here, a dangerous killer named Jinx got her hands on Hextech. She was using it to kill people and she hadn't even used it to its full potential." Little does Jayce at this point now that this is a prophecy of sorts. Jinx does eventually use it to its full potential and the consequences have yet to be known.

"I can't deny that the fact a psychopath can use it is a big strike against sharing it without safeguards." They hadn't even considered someone could take the crystals let alone use them. Viktor had been pushing all the same for them to do it, but that's because his time was limited, he wanted to be positive the Undercity would be taken care of. Alas.

He smiles. "Viktor rarely raises his voice. Even when he's angry or frustrated at me. He emphasizes more than yells." As in he puts emphasis on certain words or makes every one of them firm and angry. Rather than raising his voice, because he doesn't need to. Viktor angry at him is one of his worst fears, and it's already happened big time.

Jayce probably could get people to focus, he does have a strong presence, but he is more diplomatic than firm. And sometimes to herd (genius) cats, you need someone who will tell them all to shut up.

Jayce brightens at the agreement and his fondness for the younger man shows in a gentle smile, warm gaze. "Enchantments. I was asked to try and find a way to enchant the things I make, like swords as protection against certain types of fractures, and I've been doing what I can. But Free Cities is limited in its academic magic."

"That really makes things more complicated if you can't even properly scale it down."

More complicated than regular magic... though not dissimilar in some ways to his magic. Antari magic was always a power of seismic proportions. It could barely be used for small things. It was feared for a reason, even if Kell hated that reason.

"I assume that you were you able to find and stop her."

It's a statement not a question, because obviously Jayce would go on a chase himself, and obvious that he would succeed. It's what Kell would do. Why else mention it? The topic is not that interesting enough to continue though, so Kell drops it the moment Jayce goes back to magic.

"I don't know a lot about enchantments, but I can ask around, see what people would recommend, what I can get you."

Kell plans to branch out from alchemy eventually. Thornean magic is interesting on its own. No reason he can't branch out into enchantments.

"I know, I really have to figure out how if we're going to make it public. It's difficult since there are no magical experts, no one we can call, no one who can help."

Jayce assumes there is a way, but it may just be that collecting arcane magic the way he has means controlling the amount is harder. A real mage would be able to sustain the right amount of strength because it is natural to them. He will always just be mimicking a power he can't actually touch, back home. But here he has it. It may be one of the reasons he's in no hurry to go back.

He looks grim. "Not yet, but I will. She nearly killed Caitlyn, someone I love as close as a sister, my Rhy, twice now. I'm not going to let her get away with it, she's going to prison for life." Jayce plans on meeting with Silco and whatever they work out together, Jinx's capture is going to be non-negotiable.

Despite Jayce's flirtation with violence, he still would rather do this by the book. Putting Jinx away will be a good sign of law and order, in comparison to them attempting to work with Silco, which will always put a bad taste in his mouth but seems necessary. He doesn't even know the woman or anything about her, outside of her sadistic behavior.

"Thank you, I appreciate it. I'm always looking to improve my inventions and this seems like the natural next step." Jayce never really settles for good enough. "How are things over in Thorne?"

"Maybe if you could explain it enough to me, I'd be able to find someone here to consult? If you think this could get you in trouble with your city officials, I'm sure we can invent a way so that they never find out."

He's not a diplomat - that's Rhy's job - but Kell knows enough politics, and is aware enough of the strained relations between the cities, to guess that a person from one city openly reaching to consult specialists from the other city about potentially ground-breaking technology could be viewed as treason by some. Not that he'd ever suggest they shouldn't do it. Rather, they should be careful while doing it.

"Prison? That's... a very moderate reaction." And a very responsible one. Kell has none of Jayce's restraint in matters like this. Nor he exactly wants to have it. "I'd kill anyone who'd even try to hurt Rhy." In fact, he did. Multiple people. They don't really talk about it, but he did. Would have done it again without a second of hesitation. Law and order have nothing to do with it. Nobody touches his brother, and Kell is not especially law-abiding citizen. He's never been one.

Kell shrugs.

"Tense," he replies. "But when ever they ever weren't. Nocwich delegations caused quite the stir. People keep gossiping about them right up till now. All kinds of tall tales keep circulating. I don't really have an opinion on either of them, but I won't say I'm not curious. I had an impression they were particularly interested in us."

Another faction wanting to use them for advancement of their cause. What else is new.

"Oh, no, sorry, that impossible moderation is back home, not here. Cadens seems to have figured out exactly what we could not, they have controlled New Magic in various forms of power that are safe for other people to use."

In a way, Jayce talking about it is more wistfulness that they accomplished what he never could. He and Viktor wanted to be able to share their work with the world, but Heimerdinger turned out to be right that they couldn't control it safely. New Magic is different. He doesn't know yet how they did it. Arcane magic was too powerful maybe, in his world, unable to be broken down the way they can here. A world full of magic is capable of so much more.

"I'm getting closer to being allowed to see their arcane crystals here. I've been rising the ranks at the academy, volunteering as a research assistant. Viktor and I have a project that has to be done and it can only work if we get something to power it. But they have to permit us."

Viktor's life has been extended through a stop-gap with Jayce's magical healing and some other helpful additions, but it is not permanent. Until they get the Hexcore done and have it work, they can't cure him. They aren't at desperation level yet, or Jayce would have just stolen it by mow.

He sighs and rubs the back of his neck. "In this case, it's important I have restraint. It may not be what I want to do, but it is what I have to do." Executing her is not an option. In a fight, maybe, but not in this case. If they are to find a way to keep peace with Zaun, he has to do things by the book. Jayce just made a very violent and costly mistake. He has to do better.

"They were particularly interested in our blood, apparently. Which I thought at first meant they were interested in studying how we are biologically different from others, like that would explain why we can go to the Horizon and not them." Which would be Jayce's genuine interest! "But it turns out they eat blood."

When there's only a tiny opening through which the magic can flow, is it really all that surprising that can't have a trickle, only a waterfall? That would be Kell's guess if Jayce asked for his opinion. Which is rather moot at this point, since what matters is what works here, not theorizing what could have worked back at Jayce's city. A place he never visited, so all his opinion are mere speculation.

"I see," he says, even if he doesn't.

Or rather, he doesn't want to, or wouldn't want to if this was about him. Clearly, there's politics involved, and the situation is more complicated than it would seem from such a short description. It's also not his place to lecture Jayce what he should or shouldn't do. As much as he wants to disagree. As much as he wants to say that what one has to do, what one is allowed or expected, has little meaning when it comes to the most important people in your life. But it won't help, so that one time, he doesn't.

"I heard that too, but thought it's just a rumour. They really eat blood? I wonder if it gives them access to magic unavailable to anyone else."

It sounds gross, but not completely devoid of sense. Tapping straight to the source of magic can and quite often does, Kell is himself the best example, give a person a closer relation and a better control over it.

Jayce feels the need to explain even if Kell didn't ask. Maybe because he will always be trying to think about this and figure out his actions and his motivations. Although he knows his motivations and what set it off, it's just difficult to get past the results.

"I ... did something, in retaliation to her attack on the bridge. I attacked one of their drug factories personally, using a Hextech weapon. People died." It is really difficult for him to admit to, in fact only a few people know about this particular shame in Jayce's actions, but he trusts Kell. And he knows he will not judge like some people might. It isn't a cut-and-dry situation. It is still hard for Jayce and it shows, in the regret in his eyes, his slumped body language.

"As the head of the council and a political figure, it was an unprecedented act of violence. I honestly don't know what they will do with me, it happened right before I got here.." Therefore why it still haunts him and he's struggling. It's been months but as anyone who has been in his nightmares know, he hasn't let go. He assumes he will be kicked from the council, he probably would be in jail if he wasn't already given permissive attitudes. The council wouldn't let their own leader be placed there.

"I planned on making a deal with the Undercity head of power to try and make peace after what I did. Before they can arrest me. I get Jinx, he gets independence. That's the plan, at least." So executing her personally is the last thing Jayce can do in this position. It's all very sensitive and imbalanced and he doesn't even know if it will work. And also, he lost his taste for violence almost right away.

Jayce didn't expect to say all of that but there is a sense of relief when he does. One less boundary between friends.

"They eat blood, yes. It's how their species survives. It's a little unsettling, but they can't change who they are, so."

Rhy always says that he, Kell, has one face for the people he cares about, and a completely different one for everyone else. That it is true does not make Kell more likely to protest whenever he hears it. But it is... true.
He's unusually expressive with Jayce, to the point he has to stop himself, because making faces at head of the council and political figure could be hurtful. As if he was making fun of things that Jayce treats very seriously. So no matter how much he despises such terms, the weight and the meaning they carry, Kell refrains from commenting.

"They would do well remembering that you are human, and whatever your reaction was - exaggerated or not - was caused by an indiscriminate act of violence done, even if not directly to you, then to people close to you. I doubt either of them would have shown much restraint in your place."

Kell lets out a sigh. That didn't sound very genuine. Or even what he actually meant.

"I'm not trying to excuse you, Jayce. I just think you batter yourself too much over what was clearly an accident, and one that you regret."

A tendency he's overly familiar with himself. Kell has done his share of shady. Sometimes for not necessarily great reasons. He has a metaphorical closet full of regrets. While going back in time and fixing those blunders remain out of his reach, it doesn't mean he feels good about it.

"Interesting. I thought it was just a strange custom, and not a necessity. That would explain why I've never heard about them before. They might even be wonderful and peace loving people, but I doubt anyone in Thorne would be happy to have them as neighbours."

Honestly at this point Jayce would make faces at those titles as well, but that is more because coming off what happened, and everything surrounding it, he is very skeptical about politics and those in power. He learned a lesson about it, having always assumed the Council had everyone's best interests in mind, even if they were a little puffed up and snooty. And selfish at times. But being a part of them changed it and it made him more world-weary. For good or for ill.

"Well, the idea was brought to the Council, and I told them I was for it and they voted against it. And then I did it anyway. So. Yeah. I'm in trouble." Jayce doesn't know that he disagrees with whatever punishment he gets. He is punishing himself just fine, but he definitely should not be allowed a seat in power after that blatant disregard.

"She did several attacks on us at that point and stole my Hexcrystal to create her own weapons with. The drug factory in question, it's how the criminals control the Undercity populace, they get them addicted. A woman from there, who Cait trusted, told me it was a way to cut off power to Silco, the gang boss." So. There was sound reason behind it. He just wasn't doing it out of reason, he was doing it out of anger and violence. Motivations do actually matter.

"It wasn't an accident, I knew what I was doing, I just didn't consider the consequences. Most of the people in that factory were civilians just trying to make a living. Even the ones who were fighting me directly, it was self-defense." Because he attacked first, so they were protecting the factory.

"Viktor is still angry at me about it." Which obviously does not help Jayce feel like he can just write this off as a mistake and allow himself any slack on the issue. Viktor expected better of him. "I know it might not make a lot of sense to you, but it's a mess for our world." Kell has likely gone through many other more questionable things, Jayce knows that much.

Edited 2022-09-19 20:29 (UTC)

Kell's experience with those in power ... is spotty at best. He's still likely to assume good will more often than not, despite the long string of evidence to the contrary that he had personally witnessed. Somehow, he managed to hold to the conviction that bad rulers are an aberration. They are the ones who failed to live up to the ideal and expectations their high position carry. Even if he had met, on numerous occasions, many that never intended to try.

"Oh."

He'd like to say that Jayce was right to stand up to the Council... but he can't. Both, because himself just said so, and because - this time - he really was wrong. They were right, for all the wrong reasons, yet no less right. He was wrong for many very valid reasons. But wrong is wrong, and pushing it, doing it his way consequences be cursed, caused harm.

Kell's anger is not of the flashy, explosive one. His anger seethes and festers. It's able to fuel his darker instincts for long years. If it were him, he would have gone after that woman a lot more quietly, more deliberately, but hardly less ferociously. And there's no guarantee that innocent people wouldn't have been hurt in the process.

"That's probably not helping, but honestly, I doubt I'd have fared any better in your place."

And Rhy would be so mad at him, if he did anything like that.

Jayce is explaining because he does want it clear that he did the wrong thing. He was definitely pushed past the point of reason by Jinx's constant violence and her ability to use his technology to kill people. The hopelessness of losing Viktor combined with righteous anger and frustration at a system he'd believed in that turned out to be corrupt, it made a very bad stew. Mel told him he had to create weapons so they could defend themselves against it, and at the time, he would've never thought he could brandish a weapon let alone do anything like that.

"I've heard that from others too. I guess irrational emotions make fools out of a lot of us." Jayce is so pushed forward by emotions. He is the smartest person in his world, along with Viktor, but Viktor can be reasonable, and Jayce lets his heart guide him more than his head. And he learned a lesson about that.

"I think the lingering issue I'm dealing with is facing an ugly part of myself. You have to understand, I'd never been in a fight in my life really, I'd never responded with violence to anything." In that they may be different, but that's where a lot of the struggle stems from. To be a peaceful person at the core. A scientist who only builds, not destroys. "It turns out I have an anger problem that I wasn't aware of."

Kell saw his passionate plea to the Council all those years ago, and his restrained anger toward his mentor, but neither spoke of actual violence. Emotional, yes, but clear-headed, genuine, sincere. This was something else entirely. "I'm worried about how easy it was, if I'd do it again." Jayce is only worried because he does think that he will.

"I don't think emotions are the problem. I've met people almost devoid of them, and they're worse. Much worse." Cold, cruel, calculating, manipulative monsters. The only emotion they had was the joy of seeing others suffer.

"Everyone has a breaking point. It's never fun to learn you're not an exception to that."

Kell can only imagine how it must feel to see your own invention, the work of your hands, your source of pride, turned into the instrument of destruction. He never created a thing in his life. But he knows how it feels to be so angry you stop caring about holding back. To wish for the other to suffer as you have suffered.

"You say you've never been in a fight before that, and I've in far too many. I've knocked way too many teeth, and broken way too many bones in defence of my dear brother who just couldn't stay out of trouble. But I was never intentionally cruel. I never wanted to cause harm to people. Until that one day when I did."

Kell shivers at memory. It's chilling, even after so long, to remember the state he was in then. He'd love to say he wasn't himself, but no. He was very much himself. He used every skill, every talent, every drop of advantage he could to hunt down and exterminate those people. The very same people that Rhy has so graciously pardoned. Because Rhy gets to be gracious.

"It sucks to know you're capable of such things. I know I am. I wouldn't exactly call myself a good person, but I thought I was better than that. That I was above such things. Turned out I wasn't. But that's how it is."

"And I don't think you have anger problem." In fact, it's quite the opposite. Passionate, yes, but not angry. "I do think you have been pushed too far."

"Exactly. I couldn't see myself as cruel and violent and wanting to hurt anyone, but I did right then. I felt so righteous when I was fighting. It felt good. All I could feel was rage and something almost like relief." And that was such a strange thing to feel in that situation, but it's because Jayce finally let it all out. Everything he was holding inside, all his anger and frustration, all the tension and grief, he let it pour into his rage and out of him.

He looks at Kell and really does understand that the two of them were drawn to each other because of all the things they had in common, instead of all the things they did not. They were different in a lot of ways, but somehow the core of where they were at when coming here is the same.

"We made mistakes, but in a way, we both did it out of love." For Rhy and for Caitlyn. "That isn't an excuse, it just means we're people, and people are flawed." And they are trying not to do it again.

"I try to spend every day being better or being the person I want to be. It's not easy, but it does make the guilt easier to carry."

Personally, Kell doesn't think his good intentions mattered to the people he murdered in cold blood. But their intentions, the same intentions that made them almost kill his brother, mattered a lot to him. They were certain they're justified in their actions. They thought they were doing the right thing. The same way, he thought he was justified and doing the right thing when he hunted them down in retaliation.
In the end, neither of them were.

"I think that's a good strategy. Better than the one I was using for years, which is not think about it too hard... or even at all."

Kell has his doubts if being a better person, of the kind that Jayce, or his brother, are, is even in his reach. There's his own innate blood magic, and the stray bits of the black stone that he feels forever tainted him. It still makes sense to try. If trying might be just enough to stop him from doing something stupidly disastrous the next time, it's already worth it.

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We Can't Wait For Progress

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Maybe we can wind down on this one? Wrap on yours?

Yess, perfect spot to wrap it up