yennefer of vengerberg. (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
vixening) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
abraxaslogs2022-09-06 05:19 am
vixening) wrote in abraxaslogs2022-09-06 05:19 am
[ open ]
Who: yennefer + others
When: september
Where: castle thorne + the horizon
What: after the events of the nocwich, and the retaliation from all sides, yennefer keeps busy. ota unless specified otherwise.
Warnings: yennefer's bad moods, etc.
When: september
Where: castle thorne + the horizon
What: after the events of the nocwich, and the retaliation from all sides, yennefer keeps busy. ota unless specified otherwise.
Warnings: yennefer's bad moods, etc.
can wrap here or you can do an end tagger :D
[ Not that he is saying he will stop loving her simply because he wants to 'let it be.' She wants to stop him because of a million reasons, but Istredd thinks getting it out into the air will stop this tension. The constant fear of his about this stupid secret he tried to keep, when there really is no need. He loves her. He's always loved her. Nothing changes by speaking it outside of the fact neither of them have to lie to themselves about the truth. There is freedom in accepting what can't be changed and living with it.
He does not expect her to return the words, of course not. That isn't her. And he does know her so intimately well. They were each other's first friends and longest friends, what they shared cannot be duplicated. No one will ever be to them what they are to each other. It is that easy. Istredd always knew she would outgrow him. Their relationship had an expiration date. But maybe not forever. There would always be a possibility, as long as they both drew breath.
Some relationships simply are the way they are, eternally. And he is fine with that. Being loved is more complicated than loving. The latter feels natural, if painful.
She is lost and alone and powerless, although not entirely, there is always the magic here. But it cannot be enough compared to what they have, the chaos she used. Istredd can at least offer her an ally. A person she can count on. Someone who expects nothing out of her, except perhaps influence occasionally, in ways she probably will never mind.
Her fingers on his arms feel so solid and he soaks in the attention, brief though it may be. He moves his hands up to take hers, a point of contact, of joined support. ]
I won't fail you in this, not again. We will find a way, Yenna. I don't have much faith in anything.[ A wry smile. ] But in us, when we actually work together? I do.