abraxaslogs | [open] january/february catchall

Entry tags:

[open] january/february catchall

Who: Viktor and special guests and YOU
When: January through early February
Where: Cadens, the Horizon
What: open stuff, closed stuff, dangerous and illicit magical surgery, the usual
Warnings: the usual references to terminal illness including a steep decline and medical procedures/surgery. will list additional warnings as needed.

[open and closed starters in comments! This is also a general catch-all for Viktor’s do-or-die attempt to cure himself, and the events leading up to it, and his recovery (to come later). If you want a custom starter or something specific, just hit me up. full horizon details are here for any and all wildcarding needs. For everything else, I’m on plurk at

whitticus and on discord at whitticus#8139.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"Of course, love." Jayce kisses the top of Viktor's head gently and he has to move away, if only to get said drugs. He's not leaving his sightline at least, he has it all nearby and easy for them.

He's glad that Viktor is not going to argue about them; pain relief is very necessary considering, and he has lived for so long with pain. It seems unfair, like now may be the start of time that he can be in less pain. His leg and back will always be this way, but with his illness cured, it doesn't have to be the same.

Jayce is on top of pain management and everything he'll need medically, and monitoring his health to a T. He has always been methodical, but nothing is more necessary than handling this post-op perfectly. Otherwise it would have been pointless. He measures out the correct dosage carefully, coming back to him.

"We did, V. It's not just me being optimistic. All the data is irrefutable." And he knows when it comes to Viktor, data helps more than feelings. "The Hexcore is locked up, when you make it through tonight and we have clean readings tomorrow, I'm taking care of it." It'll be enough days past the surgery to be positive of their findings.

He is wary though, not having forgotten Viktor's reaction to it either.

Viktor feels Jayce's absence the minute it's gone--he thinks he'd like nothing more than to sit in bed together, even though he knows it's probably unwise. He'll be asleep again soon, anyway. That in itself is a strange feeling, knowing he has the luxury of spending all the time he needs resting. He thinks, finally, that he might allow himself to do it.

Jayce is only away from his side for a moment, but in that time he confirms what they hadn't dared to hope for. Sure, he'll want to see the data, but he also knows he can trust what Jayce is saying. There's no reason to lie, at this point, unless he's expected to drop dead within hours, and Viktor feels a marked enough change to believe this. By the time Jayce returns to his side, Viktor is gazing up at the ceiling, eyebrows pinched together, trying to hold back silent tears.

"Sorry," he manages after a moment, pressing the corner of the bedsheet to his face. "I just didn't think--"

He'd tried to be optimistic, of course, but had never been able to chase away the doubt. The fact that they've done it, to greater success than he ever thought they could, well. It's overwhelming.

This is the second time he's seen Viktor cry, both times only in the last few weeks, and it causes his heart to clutch, feeling pained and emotional about it. The last time was in fear, but this time is in hope. He would put aside the drugs to react, but that's a few more seconds Viktor needs to be in pain, which isn't necessary.

He injects it so Viktor can have some physical relief, while the emotions still are churning. Once that is done though Jayce turns toward Viktor and cups his face in his hands, brushing tears away with his thumbs. "You never have to be sorry about feeling things with me." Jayce is a crier. He stopped feeling embarrassed about that years ago.

He leans in to kiss Viktor very gently on the lips and then on the forehead. "You're going to live, V. A very long and happy life if I have anything to say about it." Jayce smiles, pulling back to look at him again. Despite being in recovery and weak, he still looks better. Soon he'll have color in his face again, he'll be able to put on healthy weight, be closer to how he was when they first met.

By now the motion is automatic, Viktor turning his arm over so that Jayce can more easily administer the syringe into his catheter, though even as he feels immediate relief he can't seem to stop crying. It's silent, muffled, and he tries to sniffle through it when Jayce leans in to kiss him, but otherwise uncontrollable.

Maybe that's okay. Probably it was a long time coming, and of course he's not going to be blamed, given the circumstance. This is, in fact, the only place where he can make known the full extent of his feelings, and the only person he's comfortable being this vulnerable for. That means more to him than he can properly express.

"I still can't believe it," he offers with a breathy laugh. You're going to live is a statement that, while true, he can't exactly wrap his head around. There's an entire future unfolding in front of him, now, and it's like his brain hasn't quite formed the synapses for it yet.

What he does know is how badly he wants to kiss Jayce, so he takes his hands and encourages him to bend down again. Viktor smiles even as he blinks away tears. "What will we do with all of this time?"

If there was any reason to cry, this is one of them. The fear of death, and then the reality of life. Jayce doesn't see any reason to stop him, he needs to let this out, it's been stuffed inside of him so long. Release is the only thing that can happen. He is there with him so he doesn't have to be alone with it, like he'll never have to be alone again.

Viktor lived with the knowledge of his death coming far longer than Jayce, who only found out less than a year ago. But after months of them building a real life together, something even bigger to lose, you're going to live is a big statement. A wonderful one. He smiles and leans down at Viktor's request to kiss him again.

"We're going to go on a vacation." This he sounds as sure about as he does anything. He has his confidence back again, considering they achieved a miracle. "Once you're feeling well enough, we're going to Aquila, and we're going to enjoy the sun and beach and not think about things for a few days." Jayce has been planning their getaway for a long time, but it was never the right time. This is going to be the right time. He kisses him again.

"And when we get back, we'll go back to the drawing board with the miners, you'll finish your projects that have been put to the side, and we'll improve Libertas." Relaxation followed by the thing they love best, staying busy.

Where just days ago Viktor might have chastised Jayce for focusing on a future he wasn't sure he'd live to see, he grins broadly when he hears the plans. Of course he knows what they're going to do next, and for once he finds himself completely unconcerned about the prospect of a vacation. He could use one. They both could.

"No objections."

Viktor holds Jayce's face in his hands and looks at him for a few long moments. For as thrilled as he is about his prognosis, and the promised vacation, there's still a bittersweetness to it all.

"What we've done...this is a revelation, Jayce." The fact that it worked is a miracle--a testament to their combined intelligence and drive. Saying it out loud makes it more real. They were able to use it on him, yes, but no one else will benefit from the technology. They won't be able to refine it. Make it less invasive or explore its other uses. He understands why it needs to be destroyed, but that doesn't mean he feels any less conflicted about it. "I only wish we didn't have to lose it so soon."

That means Jayce can start talking about the future for them for real, he doesn't have to hold back because of that 'maybe' prospect between them. Watch out, Viktor, all Jayce does is think about the future when he's allowed to. Although he also has liked living in the present day by day with Viktor. A mix of both will be perfect.

His expression changes when Viktor refers to what is clearly the Hexcore, from soft and happy to a deep frown. His thick eyebrows furrow. Jayce shakes his head. "No, it has to be destroyed. Do you remember what happened in the surgery? It nearly got you killed, it was ... mind-controlling you, you were fighting us." It was the absolute worst time for Viktor to start flailing his limbs and fighting them off. It was an extra miracle that they managed to save him on top of having to pin him down and adapt at a moment's notice. It almost went very, very wrong.

"I'm glad we were able to use it to save you, but it's malicious, V. It would only corrupt you more if we kept it around." Jayce would say it was evil but he's not sure he can put human terms on a strange artificial intelligence magical technology creature. Malevolent though, it definitely seemed like. He's sure it made sense to the Hexcore at the time.

He was very unsettled by it, and it shows now, in his concern, and no small amount of distaste to it. He understands now what happened, at least in some way, why Viktor said he couldn't destroy it in the future. Jayce will burn it happily. "We'll figure out something else. There will always be other inventions."

Jayce's change of expression is impossible to ignore, and though some parts of the procedure are hazy, Viktor knows that this was bound to come up. Perhaps it's best that they clear the air now, rather than let resentment build. It's fitting, though, that Jayce is the one to destroy it. Beyond the fact that Viktor is in no shape to do much of anything, this brings his request from another timeline full circle. Now, instead of resigning Viktor to death, they're solidifying his new chance at life.

The price is just the destruction of his work.

He wants to argue--to say that they cannot assign human morality to the thing he created, therefore it cannot act maliciously--but of course he knows that Jayce is right. Viktor, perhaps, owes him an explanation, or his best attempt at one.

"It called out to me," he begins, inviting Jayce to settle in next to him, so that he doesn't have to hover. "I don't think it wanted to control me. It was offering, a, a partnership."

A new kind of existence for himself, if only he could reach out and take it. Transcendence. On the other side of this, however, he knows it wasn't what he wanted, no matter how appealing it was at the time. The only partner he wants is right beside him.

"I wasn't strong enough to say no. If you hadn't been there--"

Well, he thinks maybe he knows what happened to the other version of him, the one that wanted to die.

Jayce loves Hextech but he'd been willing to destroy and stop making it in several situations, when it felt like the right thing to do. He has adjusted to the loss of his life's ambition here very well, but he's found other priorities, other reasons to get out of bed in the morning. Ways to feed his mind, ways to feed his soul. It was probably the crash from his pedestal that brought him here, but he hasn't been sorry about it.

"There's no partnership you can have with that thing and stay alive. I think we both might have some insight into what might have happened that you haven't lived yet." How defeated and exhausted he looked, how sad he was when he said they lost their dream. It wasn't only Jayce who had failed to do good, he was talking about himself too, and the Hexcore must be a fundamental part of it. But Viktor was alone, and he isn't here, that was always the huge difference.

He settles down next to him and very carefully puts an arm around him. Gentle, making certain not to jostle him too much, taking his hand. "V, this isn't going to be the last thing we create that could change the world. You have an entire life ahead of you to make incredible things." Jayce is very certain about that.

Viktor appreciates the care with which Jayce moves into his space. He can't quite snuggle into him without aggravating his incisions, so the strong arm around his shoulders and a gentle lean into his side is more than enough. Already he's impatient to get up and get back to work, but the haze of the painkillers makes him complacent. He stares at his and Jayce's fingers intertwined, focusing on that over anything else. This is what he has now, for as long as he wants, and it's enough.

"You're right, I know."

And in the end, he thinks he'd rather have his life than all of the advancements of the Hexcore. It's a selfish admission, but all of this has been selfish regardless, hasn't it? He'd feverishly completed the device because he needed it to live, both here and back home. Its potential greater benefits were secondary. But there will be other chances, other innovations. Viktor just has to focus on that, and the new opportunity afforded to him by the risk they took together.

"I hope you know that my extended timeline isn't going to make me any more patient." Even the prospect of a few weeks in bed has him restless. "You'll have to work very hard to entertain me, in the meantime."

"I love when you say you're right."

Jayce teases, kissing Viktor's cheek gently. He rubs his thumb over Viktor's knuckles in a caress. This is more or less an acknowledgment that the Hexcore will not be fought over. Its time is over. He is going to melt it tomorrow and probably feel a lot better after he does. They got what they needed, which was Viktor's life. Now his brilliant mind will be free to make a dozen other things as good as the Hexcore. Win-win.

"I think I've become very good at entertaining you." Jayce lifts Viktor's hand and kisses the knuckles now too, holding it to his cheek. He's alive. Weak and healing but breathing and their future is real, finally. It's hard not to feel incredibly optimistic and happy about that. So he doesn't stop himself from being flushed with that brightness.

"I know you're going to be restless the next few weeks, so I figured that was the perfect time to bring you some of the projects that were shelved. There are plenty you can do from here." Not everything needs to be physically made, sometimes the plans themselves are enough. Viktor's mind will take him so much further than most people. "We'll clear off the projects waiting shelf."

"Enjoy it while you can. As soon as I'm lucid you'll never hear it from me again."

Not at all an invitation for Jayce to get Viktor to say things while on painkillers, though he's fully aware that he's softer in this moment than he usually is, given the circumstances. Now that said painkillers are kicking in, it's quite nice to settle into the mattress and their closeness. Jacye's warm face fills his vision, and he can't help but feel warm in return.

It's a good idea, to catch up on all the projects they had to sideline due to the urgency of the Hexcore. At the very least it will keep him busy through these weeks of recovery (even if he's also going to ask Jayce to read to him). He blinks slowly, sleepily, a smile pulling at the corners of his mouth at the foresight of it all.

"I think, right now, I'd like to rest."

There will be plenty of time for this, soon. There will be plenty of time for everything.

"I enjoy every minute with you, V, no matter what." Jayce knows they remain that obnoxiously in love couple and he couldn't be happier about it. Especially now that he knows how much time they have in front of them to get even more obnoxious about it.

He can tell that Viktor's starting to drive so he gently encourages him to rest his head on Jayce's chest and curl as comfortably as he can into him. He doesn't mind spending some time here being Viktor's pillow, everything else can wait. "Rest, my love. I'll be here when you wake up."

Viktor drifts off after that, safe and content in Jayce's arms. He spends the next few days in and out of consciousness, feeling a bit better every time he awakens, then allowing himself to enjoy the intervals of painkillers. He tells himself that he made it--that he deserves all the time he wants to rest and recuperate, and that work will be there when he's ready. Having Jayce so close at hand certainly helps.

By the beginning of the second week, Viktor is awake more often than not, demanding the entertainment that they both knew he would want. To Jayce's credit, he's more than prepared to stimulate him (mentally, anyway), and they spend long hours talking and working on various projects that they sidelined while completing the Hexcore. When Viktor gets tired, Jayce reads to him. Sometimes they simply sit in bed together, enjoying each others' company. For as much as Viktor would like to be recovered and back to his normal activities, this is nice, too.

Since Viktor is feeling better, the two of them are more confident about resuming operations at the shop--he doesn't need supervision at all times, allowing Jayce to work on some of their orders, at least part time. That leaves Viktor to work on his own projects, and when Jayce returns later in the afternoon, he's sitting up in bed, scrawling in his notebook, perking up as soon as he hears the door open.

"How is everything in the workshop?"

Viktor looks better with every day and it's incredible to watch. For someone who has spent a lot of time looking at him, Jayce can see all the changes, even the tiny ones. More color. More alert. He's still recovering but he can already tell he will have more energy than he has for years afterward. He was prepared with all kinds of entertainment, they did have some projects set aside that could now take precedence, and Jayce knows most people are aware now that Viktor is on the upswing.

It has made his mood completely different. Ever since they got through this, Jayce has been flying high. He smiles brightly, he is at his most charming and enthusiastic, they've sold more things from his sheer positive energy and handsomeness (typical). The Hexcore is gone and while it didn't work out the way they wanted, Jayce at this point feels confident there wasn't enough of it left to cause a problem. He burned it very well and managed to keep a tiny shard of a crystal. He would have put it on his bracelet, but then it would be public.

He was happy. Doing great. Feeling great. Until he ran into a woman with pink hair who haunted him by existing and here she is in Cadens. He knows it'll be good for Caitlyn, she's already seen her apparently, but it was a much different experience for Jayce. A reminder of something he has not left behind. Even recently with Dean he was talking about it, he isn't close to forgetting. Vi's appearance stirred up those feelings again, but the news she gave was also troubling. Or was it? He may be in a mixed state of emotion over it.

Still, he had to go back to Viktor and he is still mulling over everything as he enters the room. Is he in shock? Does he just not care? Probably the former, right? Because most people when faced with their eminent death would care more. Jayce is out of sorts when he comes in, carrying dinner for both of them. He remembered to do that before coming back.

"Um. Fine." They sold things. It's mostly working again, just different hours. He sets the food down, frowning. "So. Vi's here. The woman from the Undercity." Right to the point.

Having been ill or declining for most of his adult life, Viktor is thrilled with his recovery, as he steadily improves. The familiar pain in his chest has lessened, he's regained an appetite, and there's a certain lightness to him, as he heals. There will be some degree of pain he'll never rid himself of, but having the specter of death lifted away has put him in an understandably ecstatic mood, one he's all too happy to share, even if resting and recuperating is boring, sometimes, and gets more unbearable by the day.

Can he be blamed, then, for sounding so pleased that Jayce is home?

All of that, however, lasts only as long as Jayce enters the room and Viktor can instantly tell that something is wrong. His expression shifts instantly to concern as he sits up in his pillows, immediately wanting to go to him but not sure if he should. Luckily, Jayce makes the problem known very quickly, and his face hardens.

"The woman you raided the Shimmer plant with," Viktor corrects, because he remembers. She's not just someone from the Undercity, she actively conspired with Jayce to do the one thing Viktor begged him not to do. The two of them have made great strides in working through their mistakes from home, but that doesn't mean it won't hurt, to be reminded. "What happened?"

Edited 2023-02-14 03:55 (UTC)

"Yes, that Vi." Jayce winces like it isn't already a sore subject with him separate from Viktor, but it can always sting just a little bit more. "She said she already ran into Cait." Caitlyn who has some kind of something with her. Friendship? Connection? Jayce has yet to poke at it, he only knows that Caitlyn went into the Undercity with her, and that Vi probably saved her life on the bridge. They are close enough that Vi knew Caitlyn trusted him, and saw him as the only person to approach. It must have been today though, since Caitlyn will no doubt warn him once she gets back. He isn't worried about that.

He takes a seat, his brow furrowed, clearly troubled far past what happened between them at the factory. Every part of him feels tense so maybe it is shock. "Well we didn't get into a fight, so that at least was good." Jayce did think it was possible. They were in the inn too so that wouldn't have gone over well, but he can't deny he was angry the second he saw her. They both were. But it didn't end there.

"Jinx is her sister. When she approached the Council for help with Silco, she's the one who named her the first time, but I didn't know they had more of a connection." It was brave for Vi to come to them, knowing how little they gave a shit, and to put her sister into their sights because she felt it was right. It's extremely complicated. "They were orphaned during the civil war." Which definitely touched Jayce's bleeding heart, and reminded him how little he really paid attention to things he should have.

All of this is true as he explains, and he sounds fairly clear-headed, but there's something under his skin, something stuck in his throat.

Once again, Viktor is caught between the anger he has for the situation and an innate need to offer Jayce comfort. Whatever they spoke about, it's clearly shaken him up all over again, and for as much as Viktor still harbors disappointment about these particular actions, he does wish for Jayce to come to terms with it--to not be so haunted by the wrongs he committed. An impossible ask, maybe, but Viktor can't stand to see him grieving, even if self-inflicted. It seems unfair, that they should chase away the threat of Viktor's death only to have to deal with this, instead.

So he's sympathetic, shifting in the bed to get closer to Jayce as he sits on the mattress. Jinx being Vi's sister does explain a lot--Viktor doesn't have siblings, but he knows full well that family in the Undercity was found, more often than not. To lose it, and, presumably, lose it to Silco was likely more than Vi could bear. No wonder she wanted to do something.

It doesn't mean he has to be happy about it. Viktor can feel sympathy for her circumstances--he remembers the failed uprising--and be frustrated by her actions regardless.

Still, he can easily tell that it's not just her arrival that has Jayce on edge. There's more to be said here, Viktor just needs to pry it out. "And? What else?"

Considering the weight of what they did together, the fact they managed to struggle through to something mirroring polite conversation is a lot. Maybe it's because Jayce has changed over the past ten months. The last time they saw one another they were in dark spots, and unfortunately Vi's even more so right then. But he's had all this time. He made a new life, and while he'll never really be over what he did, he has made strides to try and do better. So maybe she saw that change and it's why she decided to open up. Maybe they're very much alike, something he already suspected, made of feelings more than logic sometimes.

Jayce doesn't know how to phrase it. It's not that Vi said it was for sure, she didn't see his body, but there was something so final about it too. Final to the point where Jayce isn't sure he wants to get into denials on this. The possibility of him being alive is real, but it's not the kind of thing to put money on.

He reaches out to take Viktor's hand, threading their fingers together. Because despite everything, the insane part of this is, it's going to be a loss for others. At this point, Jayce has no reason to think Viktor was anywhere near the Council. Why would he be? He hasn't met with Silco yet.

"She said she thinks I'm dead, V." What strange words to come out of him. "Silco died and Jinx took revenge by using our gemstone to power and shoot a weapon. Apparently one that could take out the entire council." Jayce doesn't know the exact details of how Silco died, only that he did. It doesn't ultimately matter. He told Vi he's not sure he even blames Jinx. Aren't they already enemies? Wouldn't it have been possible for him to kill her too, if he went down that path?

"I believe her." And all that entails.

Edited 2023-02-14 21:57 (UTC)

For all of his rumination on the summoning ritual--how it takes people from the same worlds, but different moments in time--it's possible Viktor never actually considered that there might be others from their world, arriving past the last moment Jayce remembers. Now that it seems like this is the case, he doesn't know what to do. Jayce seems to be accepting of this information, but Viktor immediately finds himself distressed as he takes it all in. A weapon, yes, they were preparing for--but killing the Council? How did she do it? Is Vi sure? What did she see?

He can't bring himself to ask of those questions, grasping for Jayce's hand and then his arm, instead.

"No, that's not--" He wants to say possible, but they both know that isn't true. Still, Viktor tries to grasp at any evidence to the contrary. They can't know that Vi saw what she said she did. "She must be mistaken. Making--making assumptions, based on incomplete information."

Jayce isn't supposed to die. Viktor has never even considered such a thing. He just says it--doesn't seem to feel the same distress. Seems almost at peace with it. Viktor can't accept that.

"We don't even know if she's from the same timeline as the rest of us. You can't know this."

"No, I can't know." Jayce allows that denial. It could be true. She could be mistaken, she didn't say she saw his body. She could be from a different timeline. These are all facts, but it's not what he feels. Jinx attacking the Council after Silco's death, completely reasonable. What she's already managed to make out of the gemstones could absolutely lead to a weapon they can't fight. He made a hammer no one could fight. With Jinx's mind? She could blow up all of Piltover.

"But does it matter? Let's say it's a 50-50 shot it's true. Are those the odds I want to play with my life? No." Jayce is not talking about them intentionally going back because he never had any plans for that, although he knew Viktor felt differently. Maybe that is why he is so calm now. If the Singularity sends him back, it's out of his hands, but he feels better, in a way. He's already embraced this life as the one he wants, and now he doesn't have to wonder, if he doesn't want to.

That is why he is showing more comfort to Viktor than him. Jayce has already been here. The fact he's probably dead is just a literal nail in the coffin. "I told Vi this is a place for second chances. I have to go with the assumption this is it for me, Viktor." Jayce has been saying that about Viktor this entire time, he is going to die back home, there is no hope. Now it's done for both of them.

"You can't know." Viktor is insistent, grip moving up Jayce's arm to his shoulder, as if that's somehow going to shake Jayce out of this tacit acceptance of his own death. They've avoided speaking about it, especially recently, given the urgency to complete the Hexcore, but Viktor hasn't necessarily given up on a desire to go back home. There's too much unfinished--yes, he can improve lives here, but he will never stop dwelling on his failure to help the Undercity. He owes it to his people, to do what he can for them. Just because Jayce has seen a terrible future doesn't mean it's set in stone. They've proved that.

"Just as you can't know that we share the same future."

They already know they aren't the same versions of each other. Mismatched, given the days between them. But it's always been impossible to argue the point that going home would mean losing their memory of this place and the knowledge of his cure. Now that he is cured, it's even harder for him to counter. Would he give that up? Could he trust himself to reach the same conclusion? To complete his research? He likes to think he can, but how can he convince Jayce of that, when he seems to have resigned them both to inevitability?

He has the uncharitable thought that of course Jayce finds this easy to accept. It provides him a convenient excuse to leave his mistakes behind. Can Viktor blame him for seizing that opportunity? Maybe not, but he can't so easily resign himself. His eyebrows furrow in frustration for a moment before he leans over to his beside table, rummaging for a particular notebook which he tosses between them, letting it fall open to a random page. Jayce will be able to figure out what it is with just a glance, he's sure of that.

"I haven't given up on the summoning ritual." It's a confession, though he tries to sound more confident about it than he is. "If I am to make a life here, it will be my choice. Not theirs."

"I lived that future, Viktor," Jayce says sharply. They have been avoiding this particular argument for a long time and this is not the time he wanted to have it. He internally rebels, wanting to pacify and stop, but he is too far into the frustration now.

"You are being stubborn because you don't like to admit that there are things you can't control, but I was there, you just saw it like a recording. I experienced it. You told me to let you die, that is real." It's given him PTSD, that memory, that promise he made on the worst day of his life. Recently just talking to Dean set it off, and he thought once Viktor was cured, it would stop haunting him. Apparently, that isn't the case. "That is where I come from, my timeline, my version of things. That is what I'd go back to."

Maybe he is either in shock or to acceptance of his own fate, but he does have a whole lot of emotions, and they're simmering through him at a rapid pace. Jayce has to get up and pull away, he has to take deep breaths because he doesn't want to have this fight. He really truly does not. Except Viktor mentions the summoning ritual and the look he shoots him is both angry and pained.

"Of course, it's all about your pride, you needing to be in control. You'd pick that over your life? Over my life? Over our life together?" Jayce's jaw is tight, his eyes flashing. "We don't have a future in Piltover, Viktor!"

This was going to happen eventually, but Viktor, too, hates the circumstance. He hates that Jayce can stand up and take some distance while he's still confined to the bed. He hates that they should be basking in their achievement and celebrating the potential of their future together, but instead, he's already on to the next project, the one that's been in the back of his mind the whole time. There's a part of him that knows he has to let it go, for all of the reasons Jayce is listing, to say nothing of his own wants, but there's also a part of him that compulsively rejects the selfish normalcy he's dared to imagine for himself, and has only recently become possible. He can't quite get there. Not when there's still work to do.

"You don't understand," he whispers, though his voice is more angry than despondent, a hiss through grit teeth. "I can't just give up on my home."

Which is, as they both know, not Piltover. He tries to follow Jayce up, bracing himself on the headboard and easing off the mattress, even though it's certainly much more exertion than he should attempt. The thought of a world where Jayce dies is still unbearable to him. Unacceptable. An outrage that compels him to do something, anything, besides sit uselessly in his bed.

"It doesn't have to be like that. If they can summon from different timelines, and universes, and--and versions of people, why can't we? We're smarter than them. Who is to say we can't find a way to go back exactly like this? With our memories? Create our own timeline, and change things to be the way we want them? Please, Jayce--"

There's another possibility that he hasn't dared to voice--the fear that he might one day be unwillingly ripped away from all this, thrust back where he came from, where Jayce is distracted and wrapped up in politics and loving someone else. Viktor can't possibly choose between their life together and his obligation to the Undercity, and he knows he shouldn't have to. He wants it all. He thinks, with all of the time he now has, that he can grasp it. Let him try.

Edited (finding typos 12 hours later) 2023-02-15 16:05 (UTC)

"And you think I'm arrogant. We have proof of people who have gone and come back, they went exactly back to the same moment, they remembered nothing of this place. The people who brought us here didn't even mean to do it exactly, why would we be better at magic than they are?" Jayce looks at him and scowls. "Don't move, you'll hurt yourself." They may be arguing but it doesn't change that Jayce's first priority is Viktor's safety. That's a huge part of this. He steps over to the bed and very carefully tries to usher him back down.

"Is it our place to create a new timeline? You don't think that's selfish too, making things how you want them to be? If that's even possible, it's still a risk. One that is not worth it to me." Even if they somehow get the spell, if they can attempt to mess with the way it works, which he doesn't think is possible, there is no foolproof assurance. There is no perfect promise here.

Jayce does sit back down on the bed if it's the only way to get Viktor to do it, knowing that by putting distance between them he was basically asking for it. It's difficult, he is angry and upset, but running away from Viktor isn't the intention.

"V. You're acting like I don't love Piltover either, as if I don't know where my responsibilities lie, that I don't have unfinished business. We shared a dream." To do things better for their people, to change the world like they already had. Jayce knows there is a trade-off. "I will never see my mother again. I'll never have Hextech. I won't be able to fix what I broke or even try." They have a poor substitute here, for his most beloved creation. As if it wasn't his life's work like the Hexcore was for Viktor.

"I know where my priorities are. They're with you, with us. You'd really destroy everything we have for this?"

[open] january/february catchall

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We can probably start a new one later timing!

does a little time skip

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we can wrap on this one here or on yours!

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